Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Wood stork/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Sarastro1 via FACBot (talk) 21:49, 15 February 2018 [1].

Wood stork[edit]

Nominator(s): RileyBugz会話投稿記録 18:30, 13 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about the wood stork, a stork found in the Americas. Hope you find the article and its subject interesting! RileyBugz会話投稿記録 18:30, 13 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Images are appropriately licensed. Nikkimaria (talk) 01:07, 14 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

From FunkMonk[edit]

  • Before reviewing, I defintiely think the image selection could be improved. For example, we should always show the eggs[2], and there are other interesting images available of juveniles/nests[3][4][5][6], a mating pair[7], and a foraging individual.[8] This is also a nicer photo of a flying individual than the one currently shown:[9] FunkMonk (talk) 00:21, 15 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
I added a picture of a foraging individual (not the one you suggested, as I don't think it shows the wings very well), the one of the eggs, the mating, the flying individual, the photo with a wood stork shading its nest, and one of the juveniles. As always, thanks for your comments on the images in the article. I do wish I had polished the image selection up a bit before sending this to FAC. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:19, 19 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Great improvement. Perhaps Nikkimaria wants to take a look at the new images, though their sources looked good to me. FunkMonk (talk) 11:58, 20 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
They're a little odd - as US federal government works I'd expect them to be PD, not CC BY. Either way they're fine to include, though. Nikkimaria (talk) 14:14, 20 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Any reason why synonyms aren't listed in the taxobnox?
Nope. Added (although there only seems to be the one). RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Seems a bis strange that aggressiveness needs its own, tiny section, when it is pretty much just about nesting behaviour.
Removed/merged. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:30, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The intro seems too detailed and long for an article of this size.
I tried to cut it down a bit on this. I removed some excessive detail and made sentences more concise where I could. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 02:20, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the jabiru-guacu" Which is what? If this bird, simpkly state "wherein it is referred to as the jabiru-guacu" or some such.
Added after I introduced T. loculator. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "by Mark Catesby under the name of wood pelican" From when?
1731; added. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "North American fossils from that time are of an extinct larger relative, M. wetmorei." What's the difference between the two?
Size and the curvature of the mandible. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It also has been given the name of the "American wood stork", because it is found in the Americas" Doesn't this imply that there are wood storks elsewhere?
Sort of; the yellow-billed stork is sometimes called the wood stork or wood ibis. Should I add a hatnote about it? RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
I at least think it should be explained somehow. FunkMonk (talk) 17:02, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
I added a hatnote about it. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Give the source of the cladogram in its caption.
Added. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The clade that it is basal to is the clade that has the yellow-billed stork being basal to the milky stork and the painted stork" This is a clunky sentence. For example, you cna start it with "it is basal to the clade that contains the yellow-billed stork, which is itself basal to..."
Reworked. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • You could state what this phylogeny is based on in the text, and when it was published. DNA work?
Added. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:22, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Wood stork copulation" Why not copulating?
Changed. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Two wood chicks" Wood stork chicks, surely?
Good catch. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • You mention a decline in the population, due to what?
Added why. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Not a big deal, but I would maybe move the flight section to the beginning of behaviour, as it is a pretty important, constant aspect of the bird's life?
I think it might be a bit better to keep it where it is. This is because I mention certain things, like how fast it flies to foraging areas, that are better understood with prior knowledge (in this case, how far away foraging areas are) mentioned before. I will, although, move the flight section above the excretion/thermoregulation section. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "about 200 kilograms (440 lb) is needed" Are needed?
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "it used about 35%" It is used?
It should be "is" instead of "it". RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The water that it forages in during the dry season average about" Averages?
Corrected. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the water usually is about 10 centimetres (3.9 in)." Add "deep".
Added. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "with a central area green area" Wrong?
Corrected. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The one metre (3.3 ft) nest" You could specify it is the diameter, otherwise it is vague what s meant.
Specified. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • I think the sentences about predation should come first in the third paragraph of the intro. Doesn't make sense to have it between text about man-made threats.
This is how I think about the structure of the third paragraph: overall status, and then individual threats, with predation being a subsection of that. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:06, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support - looks quite good to me now. FunkMonk (talk) 06:12, 28 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Support Comments from Jim[edit]

Good article, a few nitpicks Jimfbleak - talk to me? 15:01, 15 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

  • It was originally described by Carl Linnaeus in 1758.—not sure why this stand-alone fact needs to go in the intro
The reason why I think this is good to include is because it can tell you some things about the bird. First, it can tell you that it wasn't differentiated on the basis of phylogeny. Second, it tells you where the birds were probably described (as only certain parts of the Americas had been explored before 1758). Third, it tells you the obvious, that it was described by Linnaeus in 1758. So, it tells you at least three things. Also, since this is one sentence of two sentences on taxonomy, I think it deserves to be included. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 02:20, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Not totally convinced, but your call Jimfbleak - talk to me? 07:47, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Of the extant members of its genus, the wood stork is basal, being the first off-shoot from the genus' common ancestor. —again, this technical stuff seems likely to scare off the casual reader. I agree with FunkMonk on this
Removed the sentence. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 02:20, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • It prefers those surrounded by water or over water—those what?
I actually just merged the sentence with another one. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 02:20, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • ''They fledge after 60 to 65 days after hatching—"after" repeated
Removed one instance. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 02:20, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • You don't give the etymology of the genus name even though it's on your linked Nellis page
Did that. I managed to compress the etymology of the specific and generic names in the same sentence. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:45, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • because it is found in America—I'd prefer in the Americas, otherwise it will be confused with the US
Changed. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:45, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Regional names include—what regions? US? Caribbean?
Not specified. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:45, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • it is found to northern Argentina— add "south to…"
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:45, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Para 2 of "Breeding", "greenery" is overworked
Hopefully it's fine now. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:30, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • anywhere between November and August—any time
Done, although I said "anytime". RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:30, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • 62%, meaning that about 62%...—avoid repeating figure
Removed the repetition. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:30, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Both of these methods are non-visual.—" perhaps Both these hunting methods are non-visual.?
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:19, 19 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The temperature at which this takes place is slightly above the threshold for which panting takes places, the latter of which takes place—repetitive takes place
Reworked. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:19, 19 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Where it occurs, the crested caracara—now split. Is this C. cheriway, C. plancus or both?
At least C. cheriway. The paper gives the specific name as plancus, but the study was done in Venezuela, where C. cheriway occurs. Thus, it is before they were split, so where that statement would include C. plancus is unknown. Other caracaras are occasionally nest predators, so I just changed the sentence to start by saying "Racoons and caracaras, especially northern crested caracaras..." RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:19, 19 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • link levee, thermoregulation at first occurence
Done RileyBugz会話投稿記録 22:19, 19 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Query need for a separate "Aggression" section, as above
I removed it, as I saw no need for it. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:30, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm happy with the rest of the responses, so changed to support above, good luck Jimfbleak - talk to me? 06:57, 20 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Comment: Shouldn't the article be written in US English since the species is not found in any other English-speaking nation? LittleJerry (talk) 18:43, 15 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

  • Bahamas, Belize, Cayman Islands, Guyana, Trinidad and Tobago and the Turks and Caicos Islands presumably don't count? Jimfbleak - talk to me? 19:20, 15 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Sources review[edit]

  • Ref 3: The source is largely illegible, but the language does not appear to be English
Latin. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:01, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 4: appears to be lacking a publisher
It was published by Catesby. He does seem to be a member of the Royal Society, and this book seems to be accepted as accurate in terms of natural history (considering when it was published, of course). So, I think that it is ok to keep it even if it is self-published. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:01, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 21: What language is the source written in? Also, check the page range (given as 96–10)
Spanish. It seems that I (or somebody) forgot to add the final digit. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 20:01, 16 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Otherwise, all sources are consistently presented and are of the appropriate quality and reliability. Brianboulton (talk) 23:06, 15 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]


Support from Cas Liber[edit]

Taking a look now...

  • Three consecutive sentences in lead start with "It..." - needs some rejigging.
I merged a sentence, and made that one not start with "it". RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The head and neck are not feathered and dark grey in colour. scans oddly with the negative, how about, "The head and neck are bare of feathers and dark grey in colour.", or "The bare head and neck are dark grey." "In colour" is redundant as well. I'd also switch this sentence to after the one on plumage.
Done the first one, but not the second. This is because I prefer to go from top to bottom in terms of body morphology. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 19:15, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • All of the plumage is white - well...it's not, so how about just, "The plumage is white"...
I didn't say that. I said "the plumage is mostly white". RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The habitat of the wood stork can vary, but it must be tropical and with fluctuating water levels. - tropical refers to climate and not habitat...and you've mentioned that it is subtropical as well above. I'd remove the reference to tropical here.
Fixed. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • The one metre (3.3 ft) nest is found in trees, usually surrounded by water or over water, and especially mangroves and those of the genus Taxodium. - they don't nest in mangroves? this sentence parses oddly.
Sorry; must be the order. Switched around. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • These are incubated for around 30 days, and hatch altricial. - the eggs are not altricial but young are...if the lead is long I'd leave this sentence out altogether.
Corrected. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • M. americana and T. loculator are synonymous - link synonymous here
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録
  • Singularise the male and female sentences on mean wieght.
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'd leave the second estimate of mean weight sourced to a 1962 book.
What do you mean? RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry, I meant leave it out. But not a deal-breaker. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:56, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
I'd prefer to keep it in, as there is nothing besides that statement that deals with the average weight as a whole. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 00:03, 28 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • ''This stork is able to adapt to a variety of tropical wetland habitats - again, need to reconcile this with "subtropical" mentioned elsewhere...
Added "and subtropical"
  • Link primaries and secondaries.
Done. RileyBugz会話投稿記録 01:48, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The latter part of the article reads well - I will take another look at the lead and description sections later. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 08:30, 21 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good comprehensiveness and prose-wise. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 20:57, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Closing comment: The duplinks need to be checked as we seem to have quite a few and I can't really see that we need them all. This tool will highlight any duplication. I don't think this needs to hold up promotion, but someone should take a look. Sarastro (talk) 21:48, 15 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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