Talk:Peter Vincenti/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sarastro1 (talk) 20:14, 2 December 2010 (UTC)

GA review (see here for criteria)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

• There are multiple sourcing issues with this article. I have checked a large number of references and almost all of them do not reflect the text they are cited in support of. Others partially do so but not nearly enough. Here are some examples:
  • "Born in Saint Peter, Jersey, Vincenti was a product of the Jersey Football Association's centre of excellence": The ref does not mention any of this information. However, the ref for the following sentence mentions the Centre of Excellence.
  • "helping St. Peter challenge for the Jersey Football Combination Division One title." Ref 6 does not support this, it merely mentions his place in a squad.
  • "This subsequently led to Vincenti winning Jersey Footballer of the Year in 2007." Not covered by ref 3.
  • "His impressive club form led to interest from Millwall, and Vincenti was offered a trial with the London based club in July 2007.": Ref does not mention impressive club form at all.
  • "However, although Vincenti was a regular in the club's reserve team he failed to make a single first–team appearance for Millwall during his short tenure at the club – making the substitute's bench once in a game against Swindon Town." There is a ref for one reserve game, but this is not enough to ref "a regular in the club's reserve team".
  • "He made his debut for the club in a 5–0 victory against Droylsden, a game in which Vincenti assisted the third goal." Nothing about debut, no mention of assist.
  • "He continued to feature regularly for Stevenage towards the latter stages of the club's stuttering 2007–08 campaign, playing a total of twelve times, and scoring his first goal for the club in a 3–1 win over Crawley Town in March 2008." No reference to first goal in refs, nor to him featuring at the end of the season rather than at any other point, and "stuttering campaign" suggests POV as it is not in source.
  • "Vincenti was transfer–listed at the end of the season following manager Graham Westley's reappointment in May 2008" Source does not mention transfer listing.
  • "However, Stevenage started the 2008–09 season in bad form, losing three out of the first four opening games, conceding 13 goals in the process." No mention of any of this in source.
  • "As a result, Vincenti started in the club's fifth game of the season, a 1–1 draw with Crawley Town, where Vincenti played a defensive midfield holding role." No ref to role, unless you are referring to his position in the line up.
  • "Vincenti's return to the first–team coincided with an upturn in form for the Hertfordshire outfit, and he was taken off the transfer list by Westley in September 2008." No ref.
  • "He scored the only goal of the game against Stevenage's local rivals Woking in November 2008, striking the ball first time from 30–yards that went in off the crossbar." Source says 25 yards and makes no mention of crossbar.
  • "He also scored Stevenage's second goal against Lewes in a 2–0 win at The Dripping Pan, coming on as a substitute in the 89th minute and scoring with his first touch in injury–time." No mention of first touch in source.
  • "The following game, he came on as an 74th minute substitute against Kettering Town, and played upfront, scoring the winner ten minutes later." No mention of his position in the source.
• I could go on, but I think you get the point. This is only as far as the first paragraph of the Stevenage section. I haven't checked all of the rest, but a couple that I did check were showing the same problems. Even if the rest were perfect, these so far would be a huge problem. I seem to remember from reviewing Mark Roberts that you had added some stuff that you knew/had seen yourself. If that is the case here, it needs sorting as we need reliable sources. Unfortunately (unlike Mark Roberts) if all the unsourced stuff was taken out, this would be a very different article. And the fact that so much information has no reference makes this OR.

A couple of other points:

• The article is well written but a bit listy: he did this and then he did this and later he did this.
• "Style of play": all the quotes need attributing in the text.
• Some jargon, which may make the article impenetrable to the non-specialist. e.g. upfront, striking the ball first time, first touch. Maybe link terms such as loan, free transfer.
• Substitute is a DABlink.
• Not sure Findmypast is a reliable source.
• Several dead links in sources.

I'm afraid I have to fail this, which is a pity as its a nice article. But it does not meet WP:V and WP:NOR and as I said, fixing this would make a very different article. As such, this one cannot be a GA. If you can fix it up, let me know and I'll have another look. If you are unhappy with this review, you could apply for a reassessment or relist the article at GAN. --Sarastro1 (talk) 20:48, 2 December 2010 (UTC)