Talk:What's My Name? (Rihanna song)/GA1

GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: — Legolas ^(talk2me) 07:04, 1 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments[edit]

Infobox

Needs a Border = yes parameter
Remove the internal wikilink to release history per WP:IBX.
Why wikilink Drake in the Drake chronology? Its WP:OVERLINK.

Lead

song performed by Barbadian recording artist Rihanna, taken from her fifth studio album --> The performance factor does not make a nice introduction. Establish the fact that it is a song by Rihanna. So change it to "song by Barbadian recording artist Rihanna, from her fifth studio album.."
on October 29, 2010 through Def Jam Recordings (Universal Music). --> on October 29, 2010, through Def Jam Recordings. You don't need to mention Universal Music.
impacted on mainstream and rhythmic radio stations --> remove "on"
Music critics praised the song as some of Rihanna's best vocal work to date, for the romantic nature of the song, as well as its sexual tones. --> Music critics praised the song as one of Rihanna's best vocal work to date; they also complimented the romantic nature of the song and its sexual tones.
There were some negative criticism towards Drake's lyrics, however, which included a sexual innuendo about the square root of 69. --> However, there was some negative criticism towards Drake's lyrics which included a sexual innuendo about the square root of 69.
The song also topped the charts in the United Kingdom, Hungary, Brazil and Israel and reached the top five in Canada, Ireland, New Zealand, Norway and Slovakia. --> Looks messy, do an alphabetical rearrangement of the countries.
An accompanying music video, directed by Philip Andelman, incorporates a romantic encounter between Rihanna and Drake in a grocery store along with romantic scenes between the pair and Rihanna walking through Manhattan's Lower East Side. --> An accompanying music video, directed by Philip Andelman, portrays a romantic encounter between Rihanna and Drake in a grocery store along with romantic scenes between the pair and Rihanna walking through Manhattan's Lower East Side.
was also promoted with live performances --> Remove also
, though the latter performance resulted in an investigation from the country's media regulator, Ofcom, for the raunchy nature of Rihanna's outfit. --> Make it a new sentence, removing though.

Background

File:Rihanna - What's My Name (Feat. Drake).ogg rationale does not exactly state what part of the song it is describing, what exact composition, nor does the embedded sample in the article. Thereby it fails WP:NFCC#8. Either tighten the rationale or you have to remove it.
Why is About.com in small letters?
noted that prior to Rihanna's vocals, there is a build up from with "dreamy drum machine rhythms". --> Wrong usage. "noted that before Rihanna's vocals start, there is an internal build up of "dreamy drum machine rhythms". "
In the interview --> Remove, repeated instance
She said "Drake is the hottest rapper out right now and we've always been trying to work together. He's the only person I thought could really understand the melody of the song, and the minute he heard it he said, 'I know exactly what I'm going to do. I love it.' And he did it like three days later." --> In order to stop the section from being a WP:QUOTEFARM, you need to paraphrase this.

Critical

but instead focused on the steamy nature of the song. --> but instead focused on the steamy nature of the composition.
Don't italicize About.com, its an online source.
Same for Pitchfork
"On "What's My Name", Rihanna doesn't --> "On 'What's My Name', Rihanna doesn't... Remember when you write a song name inside a quote, the song should be in single quotes.

Chart

and had steadily risen --> and steadily rose to a peak of number two.
It became the second consecutive single to reach number one from Loud, although it reached the top spot before the first single, "Only Girl (In the World)" --> This is just wrong, WMN reached #1 much before OGITW.
Maintain consistency between "number one" and "number-one".
The US section does not talk about the double-platinum certification of WMN, why?
debuted at number eighteen on the UK Singles Chart on November 21, 2010. --> Needs source
Notably, on December 5, 2010 the song reached a new peak of number eight, and during the same week, Rihanna posted two other top-ten singles with "Only Girl (In the World)" at number seven and "Who's That Chick" (by David Guetta featuring Rihanna) at number nine. Rihanna became the fourth artist in UK chart history to make this achievement. --> Seems to WP:PEACOCK statements, please try to rewrite them as they don't flow well.
who posted number one singles from 1959–1963. --> who posted number one singles from 1959–63.
and in comes a week when "What's My Name?" and Loud, respectively, remain at the top of the UK R&B Chart and UK Albums Chart. --> Please remove, gross example of WP:UNDUE
Consistency between United Kingdom, UK and Britain. Use any one.

Music video

File:Rihanna-Whats-My-Name-ft.-Drake.png, fails WP:NFCC#8, remove. Come to think of it, no instance from the music video has anything worthy of having an image.
As of May, 2011 the video gain more than 169 million views. --> Remove, we don't add fan manipulated content.
Some of the performers walking with instruments and seen later in the video performing with Rihanna while she sings were Seth Faulk, NYC sideman and drummer in The Nightmare River Band, who carried and later played the maple snare drum; LeeAnet Noble, of the hit show "STOMP" NYC, who carried and later played the djembe; and William B Johnson, of "Bring in Da Noise, Bring in Da Funk!," who played buckets. --> These are specific and needs sources

Live

of the "What's My Name?" for --> remove the
Please note that after dates, you need to place a comma. Note this throughout the article.
I see a continuous usage of common terms ("first time", "second time") etc throughout the rest of the performances. We don't need to know how many times Drake appears in the performances. And there's hardly any description of the performances, making the swection a classic case of WP:DIRECTORY.

Tracklisting

Looks fine

Credits

The list should be arranged the opposite way around. "Personnel name – credits" that is the way.

Charts

You have already mentioned Brazil Hot 100, no need to mention Brazil Pop Songs, its UNDUE.
Galgalatz is WP:BADCHARTS. Remove
The charts need to use the !scope="row"| parameter in the rows.

See also

Make a {{col-2}} for the #1 lists.

REferences

Ref 8, correct theSpin reference
MTV and online media are not to be italicized.
Printed media like Billboard etc should be italicized.
Sometimes you are using Billboard, sometimes Billboard.com --> Both being wrong. Also please add the publishers for the references.
Chart Stats cannot be used in GA quality artiucles
I'm sorry, but each and every reference needs to be reformatted, its highly disappointing.

Category

Categories need to be updated for the certifications and the number-one charts.

Overall,a good effort, but lots to do for attaining status as GA. On hold for 7 days as improvements take place. — Legolas ^(talk2me) 07:14, 4 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

What is the status of the work done? Please let me know. — Legolas ^(talk2me) 07:18, 9 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Hey I made most of the given tasks. I have to done just the references and I can't find an external link for the people in the video. I will deal with the issues. Don't fail the GA article nomination. Tomica1111 (talk)

Please tell me how much more time you need. You have already crossed the seven-day time period. — Legolas ^(talk2me) 14:15, 12 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I think I am done. You can check the article again and tell me if there is something else to be done.Tomica1111 (talk)

Just requires en-dash in the credits section. But fine, I can do that for you and the article is passed as a GA now. — Legolas ^(talk2me) 08:45, 15 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]