Template:Did you know nominations/Caroline Birley

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The following discussion is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by PFHLai (talk) 02:13, 1 March 2012 (UTC)

Caroline Birley[edit]

  • ... that Caroline Birley's lifelong love of geology started with stones she collected as a child on family holidays?

Created/expanded by Daemonic Kangaroo (talk). Self nom at 06:09, 30 January 2012 (UTC)

  • Hook verified online, article ready, prose confirmed at 5110 by DYKcheck! Rcej (Robert)talk 10:34, 2 February 2012 (UTC)

Close paraphrasing concerns. Compare for example "In her will, she left the majority of her Mineralogical and Geological collections to the Natural History Museum in London, with instructions that the keepers should select the material they wanted from her collections and then pass the rest to the Manchester Museum. She also wished that her material should be labelled as belonging to the "Caroline Birley Collection"" in the article with "In 1895 she made out a will, leaving the majority of her Mineralogical and Geological collections to the Natural History Museum in London. She instructed that the keepers should select the material they wanted from her collections and then pass the rest to The Manchester University Museum...She also requested that the material was labelled as belonging to the Caroline Birley Collection." Nikkimaria (talk) 16:15, 5 February 2012 (UTC)

  • I have re-written the offending section - I hope this addresses your concerns. -- Daemonic Kangaroo (talk) 21:00, 6 February 2012 (UTC)
  • Thank you for your willingness to address concerns. However, that was an example only of paraphrasing that seems too close to the source. Furthermore, I'm not sure your edits solved the problem - "with the request that her material should be labelled as belonging to the "Caroline Birley Collection"" is still quite close to "also requested that the material was labelled as belonging to the Caroline Birley Collection". Nikkimaria (talk) 13:19, 7 February 2012 (UTC)
Can you suggest an alternative way of wording which imparts the same information. Some positive, rather than negative assitance, would be helpful. -- Daemonic Kangaroo (talk) 13:22, 7 February 2012 (UTC)
For that particular instance, you could instead write "Her will left most of her geological specimens, designated as the "Caroline Birnley Collection", to the London Natural History Museum, with any material not wanted there being given to the Manchester Museum". I'm sure you could think of better constructions. Nikkimaria (talk) 15:55, 7 February 2012 (UTC)

What's going on with this one? Have the close-paraphrasing issues been satisfied? Froggerlaura (talk) 22:43, 26 February 2012 (UTC)

I think we're good to go now - now distanced from first two big inlines. Casliber (talk · contribs) 20:05, 29 February 2012 (UTC)