User talk:Xla*1378/Sherilyn Williams-Stroud

Feedback[edit]

Hi Xla*1378. This is a nice start, but it needs some work. I have linked to the "Editing biographies" brochure that should be helpful for you to look over.

The lead section should begin with "Sherilyn Williams-Stroud is...". The first sentence should succinctly state who they are and what do. Have a look at some other biographies on Wikipedia to get a sense of what this should look like.
Your initial paragraph is too long.
Avoid sentences that are low of precise information. For example, a sentences like: After a long career in developing knowledge of such diverse topics in geoscience... doesn't say much, and could probably be omitted entirely. Similarly Williams-Stroud is an active member of several professional organizations both "several" and "active" are very vague, and membership in professional societies is a baseline expectation for academics. Holding a leadership position in a major society is noteworthy, and that's the kind of thing you should mention.
Only capitalize proper nouns (geology isn't a proper noun); that's true of section headers as well (so "Early life", not "Early Life").
Leave out the list of positions held - you can discuss them in the body of a paragraph, but just a list of positions held shouldn't be in a Wikipedia article. Leave of the list of publications, but you can add a small number of representative or especially noteworthy ones, especially ones that reliable sources have said are noteworthy.
Don't use LinkedIn as a source. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 21:14, 11 February 2021 (UTC)[reply]