Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Marmalade Boy chapters/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was not promoted 21:59, 24 May 2008 [1].

List of Marmalade Boy chapters[edit]

I am nominating this list as I believe it meets all of the FLC criteria. Everything is well sourced with reliable references, the lead is comprehensive and provides the relevant details normally found in a chapter list with an appropriate image in the upper right corner. The list itself is well-formatted, comprehensive, and complete. The individual volume summaries are of a reasonable length to be summaries of 200 page books, with all but two under 300 words. It has been informally peer reviewed and all suggestions implemented, so I believe it is now ready. Collectonian (talk) 03:55, 27 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from The Rambling Man (talk · contribs)
  • I think Marmalade Boy should be in bold in the lead, but not linked. Then linked immediately following the lead...
  • Was the 76 episode anime based on the 39 chapters? Worth noting either way.
  • "the eighth on" - would be clearer to say "the last on"...
  • "anime only" I would suggest this be hyphenated.
  • "In North America," then "The series premiered ..." - did it premier in Canada and the US simultaneously? Which channel(s) showed it?
  • "...first manga properties..." - odd turn of phrase...
  • " is read form right to left," typo.
  • "oing to divorce and switching partners" - just "and switch partners" works better.
  • "Miki opposes the decision and tries to change their parents minds." - her parents' minds?
  • "Matsuuras son" I think an apostrophe is needed here too.
  • "but he is okay with it " - a little too familiar for encyclopaedic synopsis.
  • "he doesn't act any different," - he does not act differently.
  • Why is "date" in quotes?
  • "she doesn't intend " does not, avoid contractions.
  • tennisinvitation is not a single word!
  • "to do a lot of practicing" - just "practice a lot for.." would be a bit neater.
  • "While the family is on a weekend vacation " which family?

That's a start. I think most of these would have been picked up a peer review which, incidentally, now has an active collaboration from a number of editors to ensure PRs don't go beyond three days without comment. The Rambling Man (talk) 15:29, 28 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Good to know on the peer review. I gave up on taking lists there because it often lacked feedback. :P I did have it copyedited, but then I had to do some edits after to cut down the plot. I've addressed everything but the first item, I believe. For that one, I think the way it is now is consistent with other featured chapter lists (re: List of Naruto manga volumes and List of Naruto chapters (Part I) for example). :) For the last, its the whole family, Miki and Yuu's (they live in one big house now and consider themselves one huge family). Not sure how to put it except to put entire. Collectonian (talk) 15:48, 28 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Cool, yeah I appreciate that almost none of the lists added to WP:PR were reviewed, but User:Ruhrfisch (and I, amongst others) have been determined to keep the PR backlog down to three days. It seems (so far) to be working, but more help is always useful! The Rambling Man (talk) 15:54, 28 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I should get back to doing PRs, when I get over my wikibonking. :) Did you notice anything else? I think I addressed all the issues noted. Collectonian (talk) 03:33, 5 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Oppose from Dweller (talk · contribs)

With words like "wikibonking" (=?) on this page, how could I resist commenting...? Some minor issues in the Lead, but the plot synopses need a lot of work. I've given detailed feedback on just the first one, below. But I suggest you deal with the issue I've bolded first, as it may make others redundant:

  • MOSNUM suggests that you replace spelled out numbers >10 with figures
  • I'm ignorant about this topic, but while I understand word, the combination "anime-only characters" is meaningless to me
  • "Sound effects" cannot be the right term for something in print. And the wikilink makes the misusage even more misleading
  • The plot synopses are vastly overlong, to my mind, for a "list".
  • "news that they are going to switch partners with the Matsuuras" is this wife-swapping?!?
  • "Miki opposes the decision and tries to change their parents minds" Miki is singular, so "their" is wrong. Parents needs an apostrophe after the s.
  • "approval so" comma between them
  • "Recess" is an ambiguous word, not used in some English speaking countries in this context, so wikilink it
  • "part ways" is a cute archaism that's sadly better off being modernised
  • Ginta technically cannot be "jealous", only "envious". (I'm very pedantic about misuse of "jealous" - you can only be jealous regarding something you possess, not something you desire)
  • "spies" is another archaism
  • "middle school" needs a link

Sorry for opposing --Dweller (talk) 09:58, 13 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yay for feedback, even if its an oppose ;) I'll see if someone can re-copyedit, and I've fixed the specific items above. The length, however, are perfectly within the guidelines for summarizing 200 page volumes, with each at or below 300 words (which is also about what is average for episode summaries). "Wife-swapping"...not sure if that would be the right word. They are basically divorcing and remarrying, rather than it being a temporary thing. Its hard to convey briefly. :P I reworded in an attempt to better explain. Sound effects is what it is called in the industry, in the novels, in reviews about manga, and in the source used for the statement. They are sounds written in word form, like writing "bang" or "zoom." I don't get one item: how can Ginta not wanting Yuu taking Miki from him be envy rather than jealous? To me, that's pure, old fashioned jealousy (and what another character tells him he has no right to be).Collectonian (talk) 14:44, 13 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Length+sound effects-OK. Ah, I'm just pedantic about that word. Jealousy and envy are not the same thing. Someone is jealous of their wife (they don't want others to sleep with her). His next door neighbour is envious of his good fortune. Not many people differentiate between the two these days (gosh I sound old). Ignore me... most people use them interchangeably, though it irks me! Drop me a line when copyedit is done. --Dweller (talk) 21:09, 13 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support I made a couple of minor edits. I decreased the width of the table header to 98%, so that it'd look normal on IE7.--Crzycheetah 23:03, 23 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • The title is descriptive and should not be boldface per WP:LEAD.--Crzycheetah 23:22, 23 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      • The title is the article's subject, so it should be bolded. This is how it is done in all other FL chapter (and episode) lists. -- Collectonian (talk · contribs) 23:28, 23 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]
        • The title describes what the page contains. Plus, in the first sentence that title is split up and you have some unbolded words between the bolded ones, which is strange to look at. It doesn't matter what other FLs have; this rule at WP:LEAD has been disregarded for too long now. Besides this bolding stuff, you have the redundant word "complete' and you're linking a bolded word, which is again against WP:LEAD.--Crzycheetah 23:36, 23 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I would like to withdraw this FLC. Please close. -- Collectonian (talk · contribs) 07:36, 24 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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