Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/The Office (U.S. season 2)/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured list nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The list was not promoted 19:54, 2 May 2008.

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The Office (U.S. season 2)

Self-nom, I created this article, based off of the articles on seasons 1 and 3 (both are FLs). I think it meets all of the criteria and am ready to nom. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 20:45, 17 April 2008 (UTC)

• Complaints Comments Looks like a worthy candidate, my comments are all fairly trivial.
  • Use of the words premiered, concluded and consisted in succession doesn't read all too well - how about "... premiered on date and concluded on date, consisting of 22 episodes"? STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 18:54, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • DVD stands for digital versatile disc - thus making "digital versatile disc discs" a repetition. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 18:56, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • "several directors who are freelanced" - "several freelance directors"? STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 18:57, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • I'm inclined to think Production should be renamed Crew - the only sentence that draws away from the crew is on the filming locations. Not sure where that'd go, though. Lead? STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 18:58, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • "The show is known for its generally large cast size" - not sure how the cast can be "generally large". STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:01, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • "The Office received three nominations for Primetime Emmy Awards" - "... three Primetime Emmy Award nominations" reads better considering the rest of the rather long sentence. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:03, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • "Entertainment Weekly said that the show has" - I didn't know magazines could give reviews! State the journalist's name :) STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:04, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • When there's more than one writer in the episode list, use & instead of "and" between names. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:05, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • Any reason why "Games of the First Dunder-Mifflin Olympiad" is in italics not quotes? STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:12, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • It's mentioned "Casino Night" is 40 mins, but it's never mentioned how long a normal episode runs. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:13, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • Every citation should use Template:Cite news or Template:Cite web.
  • Victor Nelli Jr. is redlinked within the article but not in the list of episodes. Either do or don't. STORMTRACKER 94 ^{Go Irish!} 19:17, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
• Otherwise, looks good. —97198 talk 12:57, 18 April 2008 (UTC)
  • Sorry it took me so long to get back to you, I've been away touring the various middles of nowhere for a week - sigh. You asked about the Cite web and Cite news templates - I asked they be used for a number of reasons: (a) the refs would be displayed differently to how they are now, in the correct format; (b) maintains a consistently-formatted list of refs so that they all use more or less the same format; and (c) the templates display the ref fittingly according to what information is entered in the template (or which parameters are filled), e.g. a ref without a credited author would display differently to a ref with an author's name entered in the template, but each still in the correct format. And you'll most probably find them easier to work with the more you implement them. And, on a different note, I see the article title's changed... —97198 talk 03:47, 27 April 2008 (UTC)

Comments from Milk’s Favorite Cookie ^(Talk)

• Is this a reliable source? Anyways, the page doesn't exist anymore so I would recommend finding another one.
• Fill in the {{citeweb}} templates better. For example, I see an author on this reference, but it's not filled in.
• Same with this
• ...and this
• Season two of The Office aired on Tuesdays in the United States at 9:30 p.m from September 20, 2005 to December 6, 2005. The timeslot changed to Thursdays at 9:00 p.m. from January 5, 2006 to May 11, 2006. - Are you sure it's true? (Add a ref)
• The DVD contained all 22 episodes, as well as commentaries from creators, writers, actors, and directors on some of the episodes, and it also contained deleted scenes from all of the episodes. The DVD was released by Universal Studios Home Entertainment. Too many "The DVD..."

That's it from me. Milk’s Favorite Cookie ^(Talk) 18:53, 23 April 2008 (UTC)

• Due to a possibly conflict of interest, I'm not going to vote in this, but I just wanted to note that the title change doesn't reflect the rest of the season articles, and is a bit cumbersome. Mastrchf (^t/_c) 13:32, 27 April 2008 (UTC)

• Oppose-- the prose of the plot summaries is rather bad. A few examples, that I can see right away. These aren't inclusive of all the prose problems with the article; get somebody unfamiliar with the text to review the entire thing.

• "Michael hosts "The Dundies" (a play on the name of Dunder Mifflin)" -- the stuff in the brackets is unnecessary IMHO, how is it relevant to the plot?
• "as many of the awards pertain of vulgarities"--I don't understand (and I've seen the episode). Reword.
• "an obviously intoxicated"--unencyclopedic term.
• "about a problem at corporate"--that term as used to indicate the Corporate headquarters is specific to the show isn't it? It doesn't make sense to somebody who hasn't ever seen The Office.
• "A fire stars in the middle of the day in the office, leading to the employees to evacuate into the adjacent parking lot."--just bad. Reword.
• "to simply Assistant Regional Manager. "--why "simply"?
• Some terms need linking throughout--sexual harassment, Halloween...
• "Michael later embarrasses himself."--how does he embarrass himself?
• "Jim worries that while reading his e-mail, Michael would discover that he is hosting a party at his house, one that Michael is not invited to."--unnecessary complicated, simplify please.
• "procure a better gift, the rest of the members of the office all attempt to procure" why ":procure"?
• "Dwight discovers pieces of a joint"--colloquial; add a link too.
• "Oscar and Angela argue over a poster to Toby"--how do two people argue to somebody else?

• As you can see, every episode needs to be reconsidered and improved upon. I'll review the Crew, Cast and Reception sections after you're done here. Again, please don't only address the problems I've listed here but go through (or find somebody to) the entire plot summary section. indopug (talk) 07:55, 29 April 2008 (UTC)

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.