Wikipedia:Peer review/Streator, Illinois/archive1

Streator, Illinois[edit]

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A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style; it can be found on the automated peer review page for October 2008.

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… The Streator, Illinois article has been improved greatly yet is currently assessed as a stub-class article. I do not feel qualified to change the current assessment, as I am currently the primary editor of this page, and would like a review and reassessment by those qualified to do so. Thanks, Ljmajer (talk) 08:06, 23 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Finetooth comments: This is a good start on what could become an excellent article. It's certainly way beyond stub class, and it would be fine for you to upgrade it at least to start class. The photos look good, and your section logic looks generally reasonable. I have several suggestions for further improvement.

The two long lists toward the end of the article grab my attention. Insofar as possible, it would be better to blend the list material into the narrative sections higher up in the article. I would suggest moving the architecture items into the "Arts and culture" section, where you discuss the Majestic Theater. I'd move the Streator Public Library from "Education" "into "Arts and culture" as well. You'd then have all the NHRP buildings in one place. The armory and St. Stephens (as architecture) could go there too, and you could then delete the empty "Architecture" section. Include all of these things as prose rather than as bulleted lists. Done-- The section with the list of famous names is a bit tougher, but you could start by eliminating people like Ralph Plumb who already appear in other sections. The goal would be to work the other important people into the text sections as part of the general narrative and to eliminate or greatly reduce the "Notable residents" list.

Moved most writers, authors into main "Arts" section. Removed Ralph Plumb from notable list and expanded his biography in the History section. Moved local legislator into Government section. Three notables remain in the list including Clyde Tombaugh. I'll try to figure out what to do with him later. - ljmajer

The "Economy" section suffers from a problem similar to the long-list sections. It's a quasi-list rather than a flowing prose narrative. You might try re-writing this section chronologically in a way that lets us see how the economy developed over time and how one thing led to another. Done -- We get no sense of what happened to the coal industry, for example. Who bought the coal? Was it displaced by low-sulfur coal from elsewhere? Is coal still being mined near Streator? Were the coal miners able to shift to other kinds of work in Streator? Was agriculture important to Streator's economy when coal was king? And so on. In other words, the list needs to be connected in some way; otherwise, the coal, beer bottles, and heavy-duty sewer cleaning equipment seem disconnected.

The "History" section could be expanded. It says nothing about early inhabitants. Who lived near Streator prior to the 19th century? Any Clovis sites thereabouts? Former Indian villages? Done -- Any explorers, missionaries, surveyors, or geologists who preceded the coal miners?

The "Geography" section could be expanded to include more geology. What kind of coal? How old is the coal? What geologic conditions led to its deposition? How extensive are the coal beds? In addition, a bit more about current geography would be useful. You might, for example, tell us which highways connect Streator to which more well-known cities and how far away they are.

If possible, the citations should include author, title, publisher, date of publication, URL, and access date. What's possible and what's needed depends on what kind of work you are citing. The "cite" family of templates is quite handy for getting the right information in the right order and serving as a reminder of what's needed. Please see WP:CIT. Done

* I see minor Manual of Style issues such as missing metric conversions, missing no-break codes (WP:NBSP), and repetition of "Streator" in the section heads. A copyedit to catch these low-level things would be a good idea. Done

You can get more ideas about city articles by looking at ones that have attained featured status. You'll find these listed at WP:FA. The suggestions at WP:USCITY are also quite helpful.

I hope you find these suggestions helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article, especially one from the PR backlog. That is where I found this one. Finetooth (talk) 18:41, 31 October 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you Finetooth for your thorough assessement of this article. I am beginning some revisions, and will finish others as I find information to add. As I do not live in the town, I don't have access to local resources for a more detailed history. I have rerouted the notable artists and writers into the beginning of the arts section and fleshed out the Col. Plumb info in the history. You're correct, as there are a couple of notables that will need to remain in the list for now.

I moved all architecture into the Museum section and eliminated the section. It reads much better now.

Thanks again for your efforts. They are much appreciated. --Ljmajer (talk) 10:56, 2 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

You are most welcome. Finetooth (talk) 17:02, 2 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I will use the above assessment from Finetooth, as a guide for my updates. Changes will be checked, and highlighted in bold. --Ljmajer (talk) 19:30, 8 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]