Wikipedia:WikiProject Olympics/Peer review/Archive 1

2010

Winter Olympic Games

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.

Winter Olympic Games (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

I would like to get editor's opinions on this article as it navigates toward FAC. One question I have is regarding the summary of each Olympics in the History section. It significantly increases the length of the article but I'm just not sure how to comprehensively cover the subject of the Winter Olympics without a brief summary of each Games. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated as would any other input you have on any aspect of the article. I'm trying to get it up to FA standards so please be critical. Thanks. H1nkles (talk) 19:07, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Sillyfolkboy

I think a summary style could serve you well, putting the bulk of the material into History of the Winter Olympic Games. Much of the content is interesting (the journey to Lake Placid, United Sates, was a long and expensive one for most competitors, and there was little money for sports in the midst of the Great Depression./Sonja Henie defended her Olympic title) but ultimately, non-essential in a brief overview of the competition's history. I see that Summer Olympic Games has precisely the same problem. However, the Winter's history is generally good, perhaps even a possible GA article in its own right with a little work. Other possible little touches: A couple more images where possible. Change "Demonstration events" to "Demonstration sports" to fit with other content. FIFA World Cup has a "selection of hosts" section, perhaps one would help here? Or is it covered in the main Olympic Games article already? Is there not a more exciting picture of the 2006 torch? The current one does the job, but it seems a little bland to me. Sillyfolkboy (talk) (edits)^{Join WikiProject Athletics!} 04:24, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Thank you Sillyfolkboy, for your input. I'm wondering what would replace the history if it is removed. I agree with your assessment that is non-essential. I'll think on replacement ideas. Thanks! H1nkles (talk) 16:55, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Reywas92

For such a major article, I do not think it is too long at all. I believe the historical info, while trimmable, should not be split. More review to come later. Reywas92^Talk 18:28, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Parutakupiu

Please, don't mind if I add my comments in successive stages. I'm doing a review by sections, so it's easier for me. Parutakupiu (talk) 17:19, 12 August 2009 (UTC)

I appreciate any review you can give. If you could weigh in on the debate above regarding the history section that would be appreciated. The outcome of the debate could fundamentally change this article. If it passes FA, it would then impact the Summer Olympics article, which gets about double the page views that the Winter Olympics page gets. Thanks again. H1nkles (talk) 14:58, 19 August 2009 (UTC)

Regarding that point, I think that the current situation is the best compromise between length and comprehensiveness. Of course, one can juggle with some paragraphs back and forth between sub-sections, and trim some text here and there to make it even more objective and concise. Apart from this, I think that the section content is very good: you say what's important about every Games and you provide sources (apart from one or two things). I hope this helps you. Parutakupiu (talk) 22:50, 28 August 2009 (UTC)

Lead

• Use {{about}} to display both "For" links in a single line.
• "The Winter Olympic Games is a winter multi-sport event..." → "The Winter Olympic Games are a winter multi-sport event..."
• "...such as Alpine skiing,..." → Lowercase "Alpine".
• When it states that some sports have been competed since 1924, you repeat many of those in the previous sentence. Since your giving examples, you could remove alpine skiing and bobsledding, leaving just those you repeat in the following sentence. Then in this sentence, you can say something like "These sports, along with Nordic combined, ski jumping, and speed skating..."
• "Other athletic events have been added as the Games have progressed. Some, and some of these events them,..."
• "Others, like speed skiing, bandy, and skijöring have been were demonstration sports..."
• "Fewer countries participate in the Winter Olympics than the Summer Olympics." → This one looks isolated; try to move it to the end of the previous paragraph.". Also "...than as compared to participation in the Summer Olympics."
• "At that time the Winter Games split from the Summer Games." → They were fused? Better explain more clearly.
• "The rise of television as a global medium for communication has greatly enhanced..." → Redundant.
• "...performance-enhancing drugs by Winter Olympic athletes Olympians" → Mind the hyphen.
• Why not mention the other two-time host countries? It's only three more.
• France and Norway are not linked when mentioning Chamonix and Lillehammer, so why are Canada and Russia?
• "The Games will then be hosted by Sochi, Russia, in 2014. This will be, making it the first time that Russia had hosted a Russian city to host the Winter Olympic Games."

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Stephanie Brown Trafton

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Stephanie Brown Trafton (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

I am submitting this for peer review because... it's been around for about a year without garnering any significant notice from the Olympics WP. Aside from a picture, I'm kinda curious what more could be done with the article. It's frequently difficult to know what articles about comparatively obscure people need to do in order to get FA status. This is never going to be a massively long article, but I honestly don't know what more, beyond a picture, that it needs to be FA. And, yes, I know it hasn't received any rating at all from the Olympics WP, so asking for FA review is somewhat presumptuous. But I don't know what else can be written about her that's genuinely noteworthy, so why not ask what it needs for FA status? CzechOut ☎ | ✍ 03:46, 17 August 2009 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

1956 Winter Olympics

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1956 Winter Olympics (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

I am submitting this for peer review because I am attempting to get this article to FAC sometime this month. This will be an important FAC as it will set the template for how the rest of the YEAR at Summer/Winter Olympics articles are going to be formatted. I am currently working on creating sub articles for all the events as there are still a ton of red links in the calendar. FA reviewers won't like that. So any help with copy editing, prose, grammar, content, or the like would be much appreciated. User:H1nkles _{citius altius fortius} 16:06, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

• Don't have time right now to read the whole article for spelling etc but here are a few things i've noticed...

1. The major comment I'd make, which applies to large sections of the article, is that there are a lot of very short one clause sentences so the whole thing doesn't flow very well (try reading the Organizing section out loud and hopefully you'll see what I mean).
2. I think organizing section needs a different title, Organization possibly or perhaps something like Preparation(s)
3. Venues section - I assume The Italia Jump was for ski jumping but it doesn't state that
4. Start of events section - 4 sports... two new events, should probably use either figures or words not a mixture
5. Is it possible to the map with Cortina marked on it that can be found at Cortina d'Ampezzo?

Hope some of those suggestions help, I'll take a more detailed look when I get time. Basement12 (T.C) 17:11, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for your input, your first comment is especially helpful as this was not something I had seen, since I'm so close to the article. I'll definitely try and expand the sentences so they aren't so stuccato and so the flow of the article is enhanced. User:H1nkles _{citius altius fortius} 23:44, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

Parutakupiu

Hey there, H1nkles. Months ago, when you requested a peer review for this article, I began drafting an expansion with sourcing based mostly on the official report. I did not finish this but since you came up with this project-specific peer review, instead of making comments I suggest you check my sandbox and compare my additions and changes with what you already have. Take whatever you feel it could be an improvement to the article. Cheers! Parutakupiu (talk) 22:56, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

Thank you my friend, you work is wonderful. I've taken some and added it to the article. I'll continue to work through your version of the article and gleen what I can. I'll be sure to give you credit when I post it for FAC. Thank you. User:H1nkles _{citius altius fortius} 23:42, 8 March 2010 (UTC)

You're welcome! Pity I didn't go further, but I think that job is in good hands ;). Parutakupiu (talk) 00:00, 9 March 2010 (UTC)

Archive

Thank you for your review, I am closing it down and archiving it here. It will also be in the article history section. User:H1nkles _{citius altius fortius} 22:37, 11 March 2010 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

The Whistler Sliding Centre

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.

The Whistler Sliding Centre (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

I am submitting this for peer review because this has undergone a general peer review back in April 2010, then underwent a Good Article nomination process before being accepted on 22 June 2010. Am pushing this toward WP:FAC on this is done. Please do so ASAP. Chris (talk) 19:33, 26 June 2010 (UTC)

Parutakupiu — I'm going to do this gradually, as I go along the article, if you don't mind. Parutakupiu (talk) 23:37, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

• Lead
  • According to WP:LEAD, you should not boldface the French version of the name, but italicize it. Also, use {{lang-fr}} for laying out the translation;
    •  Done - fixed per request. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Comma after "Canada" in "...Whistler, British Columbia, Canada...";
    •  Done - sentence adjusted. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "...located in the... located 125 km..." — repetition;
    •  Done - sentence adjusted. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Design work started on the track..." — Is "on the track" necessary?
    •  Done - On the track removed. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Unlink "Bobsledders" (bobsleigh is already linked above), "Homologation" (not necessary and appears dictionary-ish), and "luger" (same as with "Bobsledders"...);
    •  Done - unlinked per request. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Why isn't the women's singles event linked like the other two luge events?
    •  Done - women's singles added. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Skeleton competitions at the 2010 Winter Olympics...";
    •  Done - strikethrough part removed. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "A 20 page report..." — 20-page;
    •  Done - dash added. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "...with the report being released and to the public..."
    •  Done - adjusted. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... construction award..." — Pluralize "award";
    •  Done - pluralized. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
• Infobox
  • Where in the source says that the track's nickname is À"The Beast" (proper noun)?
    •  Done - removed. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • On the fullname parameter apply the same as above;
    •  Done - removed. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "...ammonia refrigeration piped..." — Piped? Is this correct?
    •  Done - piped changed to piping. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • In the field dimensions parameter, move the "(All from [2])" to the end;
    •  Done - reference moved per request. Chris (talk) 20:37, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

• Awarding and construction (2004–07)
  • "At the 115th IOC meeting..." — Replace meeting with "Session" and mention the year (2003);
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:39, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... was chosen for to host the 2010 Winter Olympics...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:39, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Comma after "South Korea";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:39, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "...who which designed..."
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:39, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

• First testing and homologation (2007–08)
  • Unlink "Canadian" and link instead the runners names (you only linked them in the lede text);
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Luge tests occured in late February 2008 and among the luge participants...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Unlink "Germany" and "homologation", but link "Austria" which hasn't been linked before;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Lueders of Canada..."
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Add a period before ref #17;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "A total of 2155 runs (...) took place at the track with a total of 15 crashes occurring at the track";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... took place on 25–27 September 2008, prior to before the International Training Week...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

• 2008–09 Luge World Cup, including training
  • "... took place at the track on 7–15 November 2008 at the track to get sliders familiarized with it the track.". Also, invert the refs following this sentence;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... though with several injuries occurred occurring..." and "... injuring who injured his shoulder.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • No relevance in stating FIL's president nationality;
    •  Done - nationality removed. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... track's speed was too fast high..." or just"... track was too fast...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "The ITW was for luge... but the 73 crashes were in all 3 sports?
    •  Done - crashes luge only. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Of From the 2482 runs executed during the International Training Week...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • According to source's quotes, it should be: "Italy's Zöggeler stated that "The track can be tackled." and that he does not "... see big problems for the athletes.";
  •  Done - adjusted. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... slowed lowered to 135 or 136 km/h..."
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... 2008-09 World Cup season..." — En-dash (–);
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Germany's Loch..." — We know by now that Loch is German;
    •  Done - Germany removed. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "...the men's singles luge speeds reached 100 km/h (62 mph) by the time you reach at the women's singles and men's doubles start house...";
    •  Done - adjusted. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "four week" → four-week;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • According to source's quotes, it should be: "FIL President Fendt stated that "... [my] technical delegate told me this week that the ... [2010 Winter Olympics] ... Games could start tomorrow and the track would be ready." and he appreciated I appreciate "... the whole Whistler Sliding Centre.";
    •  Done - adjusted. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "135 athletes..." — Don't start sentences with numbers. Spell out (quirky) or find a way to start with words other than "A total of...";
    •  Done - adjusted. Chris (talk) 21:11, 24 July 2010 (UTC)

• 2008–09 Bobsleigh and Skeleton World Cup and training
  • "... took place on 25–31 January 2009...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • It looks weird linking "World" to the bosbsleigh World Cup event and "Cup" to the skeleton event... Find another way or don't link at all;
    •  Done - Bobsleigh and skeleton World Cup moved to respective words at start of the sentence. Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "250 competitors from 24 countries took part in the World Cup event." — Don't start sentences with numbers... and which event?
    •  Done - Adjusted and spelled out per request. Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "two week" → two-week;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Link "2002 Winter Olympics" and "1988 Winter Olympics";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "3000 spectators...", "235 athletes..." — Same as above;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... tested itself..." — themselves (refers to "medical services");
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... is fast, technical, demanding, and interesting." — Add a period after this and before ref #25;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:25, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• 2009–10 World Cups, including training
  • "A second International Training Week for luge took place at the Centre on 9–15 November 2009 in preparation for the 2010 Games, with the participation of 156 athletes from 27 nations taking place."
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:33, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Venzeula's" — Typo;
    •  Done - spelling checked. Chris (talk) 17:33, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... not providing a safe sliding environment. This was, especially after speeds were 10 mph (16 km/h) faster higher than expected.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:33, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... prior to before the 2010 Games";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:33, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "For the 2009-10 season..." — replace hyphen with en-dash;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:33, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Public opening and post-Olympic usage
  • "The Centre's official website opened was launched...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... ran from 3 July...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • According to WP:$, "C$ 5" should be "5 Canadian dollars" (note   linking the value and unit) for the first time. In further instances, you can just use "C$" but without space between it and the value;
    •  Done - changed per request. Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... being admitted free." — having free entry/admission?
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "World cup competition..." — Capitalize "cup";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... took place on [dates]...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... along with Altenberg, Germany at the..." — Comma after Germany;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... withdrew their its bid...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "At an During a meeting of the FIL Commission meeting..." — Also remove "(near Salzburg)" as it's not essential;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Post-Olympic usage will be ^part responsibility of the Whistler 2010 Sports Legacies..." — Sounds better this way;
    •  Done - per request. Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... promote healthy lifestyles, promote and tourism...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... offer revenue for the maintenance of the three facilities to maintain them.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:40, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Nodar Kumaritashvili
  • First thing: typo in section title;
    •  Done - corrected Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Lowercase "Opening Ceremonies" and make it singular, it's one ceremony;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Unlink "luger" in "Georgian luger...", there are enough links to Luge;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... suffered a crash coming out of turn 16, during a training run coming out of Turn 16.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Kumaritashvili died later that day from the injuries sustained in that crash later that day.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... Kumaritashvili's death with suspending training suspended for the rest of that day.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Two refs #49 at the end of the same sentence;
    •  Done - one ref 49 (now 48) removed. Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... Turn 16..." — lowercase;
    • - Turn number is usually uppercase from most other sports that mention them. Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • ""..does not help good starters like myself"." — Missed a period to complete the ellipsis (...);
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... and that you were one was still hitting 80 mph...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... on the crash, but also stated that however "...any fatality is unnacceptable"";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Canada's Alex Gough commented on the 14th in the wake of Kumaritashvili's death two days earlier (two days after Kumaritashvili's death...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 17:58, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Luge
  • "... to see if she was okay..." — Not the best encyclopedic language... How about "... to know about her condition..."?
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "prior to" → before. Please check all further instances like this;
    • Working on this. Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • ... Turn 16..." — Again, lowercase. Be consistent and check further instances like this;
    • See comment in previous section on this. Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... causing both of them to go airborne momentarily. Neither luger suffered any injury.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "12,000 spectators attended each of the five days of luge competition." → Each of the five days of luge competition was attended by a sold-out crowd of 12,000 spectators;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • On the last sentence, you can give the full name of the winners and link them to their articles;
    •  Done even though Loch, Hüfner, and Andreas Linger have been linked earlier in the article. Chris (talk) 18:04, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Skeleton
  • It's been quite a while, since you last read about Jon Montgomery, so I suppose you can give his full name and link to his article;
    • Full name given on Montgomery, but it was not linked to fact this has been done earlier in the article. Chris (talk) 18:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Remove "on the 15th", as it is stated at the beginning when practice runs started;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Montgomery and Hollingsworth had the fastest times on the 16th with the last training runs taking place on 17th at 09:00 PST. On the 17th, both Hollingsworth and Montgomery had the fastest runs again." — All this can be reduced to: "Montgomery and Hollingsworth had the fastest times on the 16th and on the 17th, the last day of training runs.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... before the start of the second run.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • In the last sentence, place the refs after the period;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:09, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Bobsleigh
  • "Three crashes occurred during the 18 February 2010 two-man training session on 18 February."
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... who both withdrew from the two man event" → "with both withdrawing". Remove the parentheses that follow and adjust refs accordingly;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • There's an article on Shauna Rohbock you can link "Rohbock" to...
    •  Done - Rohbock spelled out, but not linked since she was so in the First testing and homologation subsection. Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • You need to find a replacing source for ref #72 which has gone dead;
    •  Done - Link fixed. Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... were rescheduled to 16:00 PST for run three and 17:35 PST for run four due to unseasonable warm weather." — Also, give the equivalent time in UTC;
    •  Done - UTC equivalent found. Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... a sled from Australia crashed out and did not finish, while a sled from Great Britain...";
    •  Done
  • "Germany's Lange..." — Who is he? Was he mentioned before? Can't recall... Link him, anyway;
    • Lange spelled out but not linked. He was mentioned in the First testing homologation subsection earlier. Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Reactions from bobsledders about the track during the two-man event about the track...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... to have all drivers to have performing a minimum of 40 runs...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Ref #76 is also dead, so I won't comment on quotes supported by this source;
    •  Done - new link found and piped in. Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Periods are missing after some quotes, please check;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... the Germany-2 sled of Cathleen Martini and Romy Logsch were was in fourth place...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... under their own power." → by themselves;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Prior to Before this incident, Martini had never crashed before in her career.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... during the event.[89] This was also, despite no crashes during four-man training had taken place prior to the 24th before that day.[89] The Dutch team supported van Calker's decision on this.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... defending world champion Holcomb posted the fastest track times in the both runs, while defending Olympic champion Lange had the fastest start times in both runs.";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... at these games..." — Capitalize "games" (it's the Olympics);
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... crashed out on the track...", "... crashed out in the first run on the track..." and "Second run track crashes...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 18:56, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Construction
  • Don't transcribe content word by word from their sources. The first sentence is verbatim, re-write it with your own words;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... or Kwekwayex Kwelh7aynexw.[96] while the Lil'oet call the area..." — Less short sentences;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "C$ 55 million" and "C$ 105 million (€ 68 million)" — No space between value and unit. By the way, why conversion to Euros?
    •  Done - Value and unit combined. Euro was listed in the article of reference. Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "The track is made of 350 t (340 LT; 390 ST)..." — What units are all these? Spell them out, and if they're unusual, link them;
    •  Done - units are in tonnage. Abbreviations removed for tonnage and links added to the tonnage. Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... thickness of 6 in (15 cm).[7][17][9]" — Order refs;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "350 track footings were used ..." — Number starting a sentence... Also "40% of those footings..." → Forty percent;
    •  Done - adjusted per request. Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... refrigeration piping were used to...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... between turns one and two, and turns six and seven) and three spectator underpasses (between turns eight and nine, turns 11 and 12, and turns 15 and 16)" — Consistency overrules the spelling out numbers lower than 10, so you can write "turns 1 and 2, and turns 6 and 7...", etc.;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "It seated 11,650 spectators during the 2010 Games";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:13, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Sustainability
  • Overlinking here! No need to link "sustainability", "site", "ski", "vegetation", "energy", "weather", "refrigeration" and "heat". They're all very common words with no special importance to the article so that they're linked;
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:16, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... to cover parts of the track. and the The track itself is painted white to maintain track ice tempeartures low temperatures...";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:16, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "... were was composted..." — refers to "wood waste";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:16, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Awards
  • Unlink "Concrete";
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:20, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • I suppose "Public Works" is an organization/enterprise? It links to the common expression "public works" though...
    •  Done - Public Works unlinked. Chris (talk) 19:20, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • "Less than two years earlier..." — Earlier or before?
    •  Done - first part of sentence removed. Chris (talk) 19:20, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Don't make "LEED (Canada)" an external link within the body text;
    •  Done - removed. Chris (talk) 19:20, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Statistics
  • I'd probably move the first two tables to the previous section, because in my opinion they also characterize technical data about the track (physical data and turn names). If you were to do this, then I'd rename this section to "Track records" since it would only include the remaining text and the records table.
    •  Done - Statistics changed to track data for first section. second section renamed Track records. Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • On the "Physical statistics" table, instead of placing ref #2 repeatedly after each discipline, why not only once and after the table's header?
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • On the "Turns" table:
    • "Turn Number" and remove the dots after each turn number;
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
    • I'd place all refs in a specific column at the rightmost end, so that they don't bulk up the "Name" column cells;
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
    • Unlink "bobsledder" and "Labyrinth";
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • On the "Track records" table:
    • "Event" is more precise as the first column's header, while on the third column "Athlete(s)" is enough;
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
    • I'd proceed in the same way as above, regarding the refs;
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
    • Why "Bobsleigh two-man" and not "Bobsleigh – two-man" as you did with the luge events? Or the opposite... Be as consistent as possible;
      •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
    • Place the flag templates before the name of individual competitors as well;
      •  Done - for two-man, two-woman, and four-man bobsleigh events along with doubles luge, flagathlete put in for all respective teams since they are of the same nation. Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • You could make a table for "speed records" instead of just writing it down in a bulk of text. It becomes more appealing and visible to the reader. If this was to be called "Track speed records", then the table above should be "Track time records";
    • Scrapped. There is some issue for the luge events that needs resolution that neither the FIL nor the Whistler 2010 Sports Legacies Group have stated. Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Finally, that last part about the hosted championships looks a bit lost... Scrap it.
    •  Done Chris (talk) 19:59, 25 July 2010 (UTC)

• Images
  • The image in the infobox can be resized to 300px (maximum recommended by MoS); this way you even reduce the infobox's height;
    •  Done - Expanded to 300px. Chris (talk) 12:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
  • The image layout in the History section (and others) is very unbalanced, with two images cluttering the top and none along the last four sub-sections. I understand you added each image besides its corresponding text section, but you don't need to do that. Spread them evenly through the whole section.
    •  Done - Moved and adjusted accordingly.
      • I made an attempt to distribute the images more evenly and alternated their position (right-left-right) within the same sub-section, to take the most of the available space. Tell me what do you think? Parutakupiu (talk)
  • If you can, avoid placing images in positions that might make them cross into other (sub-)sections. If not possible, right-align those images so that the following section's title is not pushed to the right.
    •  Done - Moved to the right side of the article. Chris (talk) 12:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
  • Montgomery's image caption could be more related to the section where it's placed... Perhaps say that (don't quote me) the 2010 Olympic men's skeleton champion was among the first track testing participants... Something like this, because the current caption makes the image belong more in the Olympic results section...
    •  Done - Moved to the Skeleton subsection of the 2010 Winter Olympics section. Chris (talk) 12:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
      • Actually, I changed it back, because it was cluttering an already image-rich 2010 Winter Olympics section, while the History section was nearly empty. Adjusted its caption as suggested. Parutakupiu (talk)
  • Nodar's image is not free. Unless you can find a freely-licensed version, I'd say: remove it.
    •  Done - Removed. Chris (talk) 12:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)
  • As per WP:CAPTION, you can't add period to the end of image captions which are sentence fragments... These include captions from every image bar the Hufner one.
    •  Done - Captions reworded except Hüfner's per request. Chris (talk) 12:49, 28 July 2010 (UTC)

• Final comment: this article is quite heavy (>80 Kb) due to the massive amount of textual info. FAC reviewers are likely to point it out and ask you "trim" some of the content, so be prepared. Good luck on your nomination and I hope you are successful because this article deserves to be recognized. Parutakupiu (talk)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.