Wikipedia:WikiProject Video games/Peer review/From Dust

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From Dust[edit]

Areas of interest:

  • Article structure and sections;
  • Paragraph structure: appropriate opening/closing sentences; appropriate content;
  • Paragraph length;
  • Sentence construction and prose;
  • Quality of editing generally, and the extent to which it needs copy-editing;
  • Quality of referencing (not the sources themselves);

I promise cookies to those who offer suggestions. Thank you. Mephtalk 23:09, 28 May 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Teancum

  • The three images are excessive and the last two are too large for WP:NFCC. The first image is plenty to demonstrate the game's elements.
  • WP:LEADCITE states that anything in the lead that's in the body needn't be sourced, and since there shouldn't be anything in the lead that's not in the body or infobox these should be moved out of the lead. Additionally five sources for one point is excessive. If you can't source a sentence with one or two things need to be broken up.
  • There is no gameplay section whatsoever. This makes it difficult to piece together how the game plays without reading the whole article and making broad assumptions based on what's there.
  • There is one disambig link
  • The Previews section should be renamed Pre-Release and made a subsection of a new Reception section per WP:VG/GL
  • Direct quotes should use " and not '
  • Aside from the first paragraph in the Previews section everything seems to be adequately sourced

That's really all I have time to look over. Sorry I didn't really get to the points you wanted, but I have less time for Wikipedia these days.--Teancum (talk) 15:29, 27 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

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