Talk:Alright, Still/GA1
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GA Review
[edit]- "They worked in a small studio in the basement of an office building." Do you have sources where this office building is located?
- Specified that it's in Manchester. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:49, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- "they gave her" I think the word gave is unspecific?
- Specified that it was the label PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:49, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- "The demos attracted thousands of listeners, and 500 limited edition 7" vinyl singles of "LDN" were rush-released, reselling for as much as £40." Could you please add context to LDN? It just popped up.
- Added context. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:49, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- "knew who she was" Hmm. Seems odd, or just unclear?
- Reworded. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:49, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- "The album's title is used in a line from "Knock 'Em Out":" A little context for "Knock 'Em Out"?
- "She stated that she liked Albert Einstein's aphorism "Nothing changes until something moves." Also this, I don’t get the relationship with the preceding sentences. Maybe Im too slow to pick up.
- I see what you mean. I added some context to connect it to the title. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:49, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- I think it would be better to add the publication’s writer who wrote the review.
- "the icing on the cake is that brutally barbed tongue." I don’t get its relationship with the preceding quotation
- It's that her "brutally barbed tongue" is another good thing about the album, in addition to its "uniquely acidic brand of pop". PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 04:29, 7 September 2008 (UTC)
"The Guardian stated that "if the album is rough round the edges, that amateurism serves to bring the listener in", noting that it gave the album a more personal touch." I think you need to rephrase. Something’s wrong. The connection of the quotation and the main text (because of the presence of "if").- "In late July 2006, it debuted at number two on the UK Albums Chart, behind Razorlight's self-titled album." I think its fine to remove Razorlight stuff, unless it is significant.
- "according to British record labels trade association the BPI" I think it would be better to identify BPI as such in its first appearance in that section.
- I can't find BPI in the article, in this revision or the one you reviewed. I only see it identified as the British Phonographic Industry. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:54, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- "The album had moderate international performance" Moderate it POV. Readers have different interpretations of moderate.
- "At the 2008 Grammy Awards, the album was nominated for Best Alternative Music Album but lost to The White Stripes' Icky Thump.[29] Ronson's production on "Littlest Things" helped him win a Grammy Award for Producer of the Year, Non-Classical." I think it does not belong to the section Commercial performance. Maybe in the preceding section but rename it to reception only.
- "It debuted at number seventeen on the United World Chart but was unable to reach a higher position." UWC is not reliable.
- I think the release history section is not significant, and the fact that it’s not sourced.
- Wikipedia:WikiProject Albums#Release history recommends using one so that all the dates don't get put in the infobox. The information is cited to the Alright, Still releases themselves (since they are published primary sources). PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 23:52, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
I'll put the article on hold for seven days to give ample time in addressing my comments above before it could be passed as GA. Thank you and happy editing. --Efe (talk) 02:47, 2 September 2008 (UTC)
- I think there are still unaddressed comments? Please check. --Efe (talk) 11:33, 11 September 2008 (UTC)
- Sorry, I thought I had gotten all of them. I think they've all been addressed now. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 05:43, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
- This one: "The album had moderate international performance" Moderate it POV. Readers have different interpretations of moderate." When you're done, I'll reread the article and pass it when it meets criteria. Happy editing! --Efe (talk) 12:51, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
- I had already changed that in the article. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 13:24, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
- This one: "The album had moderate international performance" Moderate it POV. Readers have different interpretations of moderate." When you're done, I'll reread the article and pass it when it meets criteria. Happy editing! --Efe (talk) 12:51, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
- Sorry, I thought I had gotten all of them. I think they've all been addressed now. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 05:43, 12 September 2008 (UTC)
- More comments
I have reread the article and looks good, although there are some stuffs to do before I pass this. Mostly are minor lapses and clarity. After being addressed, I will pass this to GA. Happy editing.
- Why its “‘‘‘reselling’’’ for as much as £40.”?
- I don't know what this question is supposed to mean. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 22:08, 15 September 2008 (UTC)
- Why its reselling? --Efe (talk) 06:34, 17 September 2008 (UTC)
- I don't know what this question is supposed to mean. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 22:08, 15 September 2008 (UTC)
- “The album garnered publicity on the Internet as Allen posted to her MySpace account” Its not actually the album but the demos that garnered publicity. Also, can you please clarify that it gained publicity prior to the album’s release?
- Reworded. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 22:08, 15 September 2008 (UTC)
- “the demos written and recorded with production duo Future Cut.” It is not actually stated in the main text that these demos are works of Future Cut, although it is mentioned that the duo worked with Allen.
- Reworded. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 22:08, 15 September 2008 (UTC)
- “The success of her songs” I did not read a little info about the song’s performance, only the rush-released. But was it considered a success?
- I changed that to popularity since the rush release was a limited edition, and it is really referring to the amount of attention it received on MySpace. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 21:32, 14 September 2008 (UTC)
- “In her songs, Allen develops various personas.” Wrong tense?
- It should be present tense since it's in the context of the fiction and not the context of the production. PiracyFundsTerrorism (talk) 21:30, 14 September 2008 (UTC)
--Efe (talk) 06:37, 14 September 2008 (UTC)
No more issues to deal with. Meets the criteria. Congratulations and good luck in bringing this to FA status. --Efe (talk) 06:44, 17 September 2008 (UTC)