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Talk:Archibald Cary Smith/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 18:37, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Criteria

[edit]

1. Prose  Pass

2. Verifiability  Pass

3. Depth of Coverage  Pass

4. Neutral  Pass

5. Stable  Pass

6. Illustrations  Pass

7. Miscellaneous  Pass

Comments

[edit]

1.

  • "55 year" - hyphenate (appears in lead and body)
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:52, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Any way to expand the lead a little?
 Done Increased 50%. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:49, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Smith's paternal grandfather was an ironmaster and had gone to sea as a sailor, so inspired Smith of sailing." - The second clause of this "so inspired ..." doesn't connect cleanly to the rest, can this be rephrased?
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:04, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It was an 18-foot sloop which became famous that defeated all rivals for years." - Also needs rephrasing, the clauses don't run together well
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:14, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Link Chester, Pennsvylania and Delaware River
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:59, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "old rule-o-thumb method" - Do you mean "rule-of-thumb"?
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 19:59, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He designed the Sound steamers" - I'm assuming that since Sound is capitalized, it has some specific meaning. That meaning isn't clear from the text.
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:38, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "This was Meteor III.[28]" - I don't think this is necessary, since the entire paragraph is about the Meteor III, so an ending specifying it isn't necessary.
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:48, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

2.

  • "The method has since been taught at Cornell University, the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, the Naval Academy at Annapolis, and the Webb Academy at New York" - I think it would be better to get a source newer than 1902 to talk about where it is taught - the sentence makes it sound like a current method, but a 118-year old source doesn't do much to confirm anything; teaching and construction methods have changed much in the last century
 Done - rewording accordingly to reflect that systematic calculated drawing was a new method taught at those institutions. It is best referenced at Outing1902 on page 228. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:58, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add OCLCs where applicable
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:02, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • America-scoop looks to be a self-published personal website. Does the author have the credentials that would render this reliable?
 Done -minus Removed --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:49, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

3.

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7.

Placing on hold. Hog Farm (talk) 18:53, 26 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Hog Farm: - All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 15:22, 27 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]