Talk:Back to Black/GA1
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Reviewer: HĐ (talk · contribs) 06:45, 23 May 2019 (UTC)
One of my all-time favorites! I'll try to review this in the upcoming week, HĐ (talk) 06:45, 23 May 2019 (UTC)
Sorry for the delay; below are my comments
- Lede
- Did Winehouse "hire" the producers? I believe it's the job of the record label; Winehouse could collaborate with or call them to produce with her, I'm not sure she had the authority to "hire" them
Done - Fixed it, and the "hired" part on the Recording and Production section was removed as well.. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:51, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- "Mixing was done by" → I prefer active voice to passive voice
Done - Fixed it. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:30, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- I would say "the second best-selling album of the 21st century so far", given that this century has not ended yet
Done - Fixed it. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:24, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- What do you mean by "rare" tracks? Are they unreleased songs?
Done - Deleted the word. AppleWormBoy (talk) 13:21, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Background
- I prefer the quote (where Winehouse expressed her dissatisfaction) to be paraphrased
Done - Fixed it. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:57, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Recording
- Is Amy, My Daughter a documentary? If so, please specify that
Done - Added that it was a memoir. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:32, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Why is there {{sic}} in the title of "Me and Mr Jones"?
Not done - Usually, when there's an abbreviation, it ends with a period (i.e., Mr., Mrs., Jr., Sr., etc). And in the original liner notes of the album, the title had the "Mr." abbreviation without the period. So, that's why I added in the {{sic}} bracket to indicate the word being used erroneously. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:30, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- That should not be it; the title is distinct and not meant to reflect correct usage of the English language (No one would write "Dirrty [sic]" or "Bangerz [sic]"). — HĐ (talk) 08:10, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Any comment on this issue? HĐ (talk) 02:38, 3 June 2019 (UTC)
- Reverted back for you, then. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:13, 3 June 2019 (UTC)
- Was there any reason why Winehouse teamed up with Ronson? Or they just met up one day in NYC?
Done - I expanded the info on their 2006 meeting in New York - AppleWormBoy (talk) 13:08, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- "The majority of the songs produced by Ronson were done" → I suggest replacing "done" with "completed"
Done - Fixed it. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:32, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Music and lyrics
- I don't like the short quote that appears in the middle of the paragraph; I would like to see the quote paraphrased
Done - Fixed it. AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:52, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- That's quite a lot of info for "Rehab". I feel like you can cut out some bits of info which do not necessarily belong here, for they can appear in the "Rehab" article instead
Done - Removed the part on the Amy film and transferred the info to the Rehab article. AppleWormBoy (talk) 13:17, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Now the first paragraph is clunky... I'd like to see it separated into two smaller paragraphs. HĐ (talk) 08:12, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
Done Separated the paragraph into two. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:36, 3 June 2019 (UTC)
- Is Hello Beautiful an appropriate and reliable source? I have no knowledge on this site
Not done - The site usually focuses on well-sourced news of female African-American celebrities with several op-eds (such as with Winehouse's song "Wake Up Alone"), and it is owned by a media corporation here in the States called Urban One, Inc. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:45, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
Will try to finish the review within this weekend. So far the article appears very well-written and comprehensive, HĐ (talk) 09:04, 1 June 2019 (UTC)
- Release
- Where is the info regarding the release of the standard edition?
Done - Found a source for the release date. AppleWormBoy (talk) 10:58, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Touring
- No sources found for performances in late 2006
- This section is mostly unsourced; please find sources for performances like Lollapalooza or Virgin Festival
Done - Found the corresponding book source for this section. Hopefully it suffices for you. [1] - AppleWormBoy (talk) 10:19, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Nope, the book is blatant copyright violation (if you scroll down for more content; it is a copy-paste of the Wikipedia entry Amy Winehouse). Maybe you can go to the original article on Wikipedia to find better sources directly cited in it
Done Found individual sources. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:34, 3 June 2019 (UTC)
- Critical reception
- This is blatant WP:QUOTEFARM; please paraphrase and rewrite this section
Done - Transferred the retrospective review from Wolk to the Legacy section, and deleted/paraphrased some reviews to de-bloat the section. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 11:32, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- I'd recommend grouping the rankings in an order, either ascending or descending (eg. the album was ranked at number one by ABC, number two by DEF, number four by..., eight by...) instead of random rankings like what is written right now
Done - Fixed it with sources. - AppleWormBoy (talk) 11:22, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- "This is the second time Winehouse has been nominated for the Mercury Prize;" → tense
Done - Alternated it with this improved sentence (hopefully): "This was the second time that Winehouse was nominated for the Mercury Prize" - AppleWormBoy (talk) 09:58, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Chart performance
- Chart trajectory is often advised against; I'd recommend keeping what is essential to the album's success. For example, regarding the UK success, I'd keep: debut position, first-week sales, total sales as of [date], any notable records (nth best-selling album of [year/century], certifications [latest]), and reappearance on the chart following Winehouse's death. This section is now bloated and filled with excessive information
Done - Hopefully I've de-bloated enough excessive information in this section (i.e., deleted the deluxe album information). AppleWormBoy (talk) 11:58, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Legacy
- "fearless and experimental female musicians" → how does this album show that Winehouse was "fearless"?
Done - Deleted the word; now it's just experimental. AppleWormBoy (talk) 10:19, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Overall
- The article is well written and meticulously sourced (except where I pointed out). Once all of my concerns are addressed, this article is suitable for a GA icon, HĐ (talk) 08:26, 2 June 2019 (UTC)
- Since all of my concerns have been addressed, I'm happy to pass this GA review. Keep up with your great work, HĐ (talk) 08:55, 4 June 2019 (UTC)
- Thanks so much! :) - AppleWormBoy (talk) 12:00, 4 June 2019 (UTC)
- ^ Rombach, Jean-Pierre (25 January 2012). Amy Winehouse. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform. p. 7. ISBN 9781470134266. Retrieved 2 June 2019.