Talk:Dior (song)/GA1
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:16, 5 February 2021 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Taking this on to help you get closer to having a GT in the future! --K. Peake 07:16, 5 February 2021 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- Infobox looks good!
- The opening sentence should mention the song being from his debut mixtape, Meet the Woo (2019)
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "alongside producer 808Melo." → "alongside the sole producer 808Melo."
- Remove the initial release sentence since the exact date is not notable
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "The song was released as the second single from the album" → "It was released as the second single from the mixtape"
- "It also appeared as a bonus track" → "The song also appeared as a bonus track" with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
- "second mixtape Meet the Woo 2 and posthumous debut studio album" → "second mixtape, Meet the Woo 2, and posthumous debut studio album,"
- Mention that it was released on the above in February and June 2020, respectively
Partly done you should only mention the months --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "A remix of "Dior" featuring" → "A remix of the song that features"
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "of Meet the Woo 2 on" → "of the mixtape on" since it is the last mixtape to be mentioned here
Not done It will confuse the reader which mixtape the remix was on.
- "with girls and buying" → "with girls and getting" because part of it only mentions him "receiving" the clothes
- ""Dior" became his" → "the song became his"
- "in the US and number 33 in the UK." → "in the United States and number 33 in the United Kingdom."
- "where it peaked at" → "where it reached" to avoid repetitive wording
- "in the United States by" → "in the US by" per MOS:US
- Remove "for the song" since accompanying music video indicates that
- "and a group of men and women dancing in a parking lot and hanging out in a" → "with a group of men and women dancing in a parking lot and a"
- The live performance should be the sentence after music video
- Target VevoDSCVR to Vevo
- "It has received a" → "The song has received a" and this should be the sentence after reception in the second para
Partly done you forgot to move it --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
Background and release
[edit]- Wikilink 808Melo
- "knew that the song would" → "instantly knew the song would"
- "He first thought it was an interesting track," → "He initially thought the song was interesting,"
- "listened to the song and had" → "listened and had"
- Target hook to Hook (music)
- "next single off of his debut mixtape." → "next single from Meet the Woo." with the target, as we know that is the debut mixtape
Partly done why is this wikilinked? --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "decided to have Pop Smoke" → "decided to have him"
- Remove wikilink on Meet the Woo
Remove wikilink on Meet the Woo 2Remove wikilink on Shoot for the Stars, Aim for the Moon- [7][8][9][10][11] is too many refs at the end of the sentence; move a number of them to their appropriate areas
Music and lyrics
[edit]- "stated that the song "throws" → "stated that the song sees Pop Smoke "throwing"
- "the song had" → "the song has"
- "Pop Smoke's voice felt" → "Pop Smoke's voice feels"
- "commented that Pop Smoke operated" → "commented that the rapper operates"
- Wikilink FaceTime
- Target Pitchfork to Pitchfork (website)
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "wrote that "Dior" had a" → "wrote that "Dior" has a"
- "of flirting with girls and" → "of flirting and" since that is what the source actually says
- Wikilink Dior
Critical reception
[edit]- Retitle to Reception, giving a separate para at the end for the award to split from reviews
- "felt the song had a" → "felt the song has a"
- "with Sarah Osei of Highsnobiety calling" → "while Sarah Osei of Highsnobiety called"
- "music critic Michael Saponara who labeled" → "music critic Michael Saponara, who labeled" with the target
- "and said it was an "instant" → "and an "instant"
- "that it embodied" → "that it embodies"
- "described it as a" → "described "Dior" as a"
- Wikilink Big Apple
- "thought that the song was" → "thought that the song is"
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- "San Francisco Chronicle critic" → "The San Francisco Chronicle critic"
- Wikilink The New York Times
Commercial performance
[edit]- "It made it Pop Smoke's" → "It became Pop Smoke's"
- "The song then rose" → "The former then rose"
- "number 22 on the chart." → "number 22 on the Hot 100."
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Remove usage of US before Rhythmic since you don't need it twice in one sentence
- "after selling 1,000,000 units, making it Pop Smoke's first song to go platinum" → "for pushing 1,000,000 certified units, making it Pop Smoke's first song to achieve the certification"
- "of over 2,000,000 units." → "of 2,000,000 units in the US."
- "The song was certified silver" → "The song was later certified silver"
- "on the ARIA Chart" → "on the ARIA Singles Chart" with the target
Music Video
[edit]- Remove capitalization of video
- "on September 3, 2019" → "on September 3, 2019,"
- The Twitter teaser is not sourced
- [52] should be solely at the end of the sentence
- The cameo part is not sourced
- Target to Canarsie to Canarsie, Brooklyn
- A lot of the following sentences are not backed up by [52] and [54]
- "and cuts to black." → "before cutting to black."
- Remove wikilink on Meet the Woo and italicise the title
- Remove the YouTube views sentence, as that is unsourced
- "A secondary video shot by GoddyGoddy (director of "Welcome to the Party")" → "A secondary video, shot by GoddyGoddy (director of "Welcome to the Party"),"
- Target NSFW to Not safe for work
- Wikilink YouTube
- Remove wikilink on Dior
- Target Manhattan to Manhattan, New York
Remixes and other versions
[edit]- Move this to being the section directly after In popular culture
- "of "Dior" including" → "of "Dior", including"
- Only the Lil Wayne and Jose Guapo freestyle are backed up
- Only the Kwesi Arthur, Skeng and Perm, and Skillibeng remixes are backed up
- "cover "Billie Jin (Dior Remix)"," → "cover, titled "Billie Jin (Dior Remix)","
- The number one position on Spotify's chart is not backed up
- "the single had attracted the attention of UMG/Virgin UK," → "the remix had attracted the attention of UMG/Virgin UK," with the targets
- "was included in" → "was included on"
- Remove wikilink on Meet the Woo 2 and italicise the title
- The second sentence is unsourced
- "were deemed as a fitting addition to the originals'" → "are a fitting addition to the original's"
- [66] should be at the end of the above sentence as well
- "third-best song of 2020 by" → "third-best song of 2020 up to July by"
Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
Live performances
[edit]- Wikilink MTV
- Italicise TRL and target to Total Request Live
- Target VevoDSCVR to Vevo
- Target hologram to Holography
Legacy
[edit]- This should be part of the below section instead as the second para, since popular culture is largely the same as legacy in this context
- "of Canarsie, Brooklyn in" → "of Canarsie in" since you have already introduced where it is
- [14] should be cited instead of [21] for the BLM part, as that is the accurate Variety ref
Not done I was clearly referring to the Variety ref --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Target police brutality and racism to their US articles
- Wikilink George Floyd and solely target "protests" to the page about them
- "is "juxtaposed" against" → "was "juxtaposed" against" since the events have been and gone
- "Alphonse Pierre of Pitchfork mentioned that the song didn't" → "Pierre mentioned that the song does not" since the songs still exist
- "remarked it had" → "remarked the song had"
- GQ should be italicised
- Move the Grammy information to the Reception section
In popular culture
[edit]- The 500k videos part is not sourced, plus change to 500,000 for numerical consistency
- The baritone growl part is not sourced
- "In the 2020 BET Hip Hop Awards," → "In the 2020 BET Hip Hop Awards," with the wikilink
- 808 Melo → 808Melo, with no wikilink
Personnel
[edit]- Retitle to Credits and personnel
- Use
{{spaced ndash}}
so there is the right space between credits and personnel
Charts
[edit]Weekly charts
[edit]Not done --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Target IFPI to IFPI Greece
Year-end charts
[edit]- See MOS:TABLECAPTION
Certifications
[edit]- See MOS:TABLECAPTION
- Italy certification should be in-between France and New Zealand
References
[edit]- Copyvio score looks pretty good at 23.7%
- Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool
- Target Pitchfork to Pitchfork (website) on ref 7
- Ref 21 should cite this URL instead and target Pitchfork to Pitchfork (website)
- Target Billboard to Billboard (magazine) on refs 40, 103, 107 and 108
- Are you sure ref 53 is a reliable source, as Vimeo's reliability is not verified and the author is not a reputable one?
- Refs 55 and 56 are duplicates of the above one
- Cite Okayafrica as publisher instead for ref 59 and target to OkayAfrica
- Cite GRM Daily as publisher instead for ref 60
- Cite Yahoo! as publisher instead for ref 63
- Cite The Ringer as publisher instead for ref 67
- Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 69
- Cite the URL that leads directly to Pop Smoke's Global 200 chart history for ref 91
- Cite hitparade.ch as publisher instead for ref 105
Final comments and verdict
[edit]On hold until all of the issues are fixed, but honestly the main problem was original research for this one. --K. Peake 14:38, 5 February 2021 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake sorry about the delay. It was very hard trying to edit with my parents around... And sorry for the original research. A newbie editor added all those unreliable sources and redundant info. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 04:31, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- The Ultimate Boss It is fine about the delay and the OR, you missed a few things sadly which I have pointed out above. --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake, Done. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 07:00, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- The Ultimate Boss You missed the opening sentence fix and moving the Variety ref like I said. --K. Peake 07:46, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- ✓ Pass since it is only two changes so I implemented them which is acceptable in the context of the user indicating at a lack of interest in editing this site. --K. Peake 07:57, 9 February 2021 (UTC)
- The Ultimate Boss You missed the opening sentence fix and moving the Variety ref like I said. --K. Peake 07:46, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake, Done. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 07:00, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- The Ultimate Boss It is fine about the delay and the OR, you missed a few things sadly which I have pointed out above. --K. Peake 06:08, 8 February 2021 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake sorry about the delay. It was very hard trying to edit with my parents around... And sorry for the original research. A newbie editor added all those unreliable sources and redundant info. The Ultimate Boss (talk) 04:31, 8 February 2021 (UTC)