Talk:Emil Fischer (American football executive)

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Good articleEmil Fischer (American football executive) has been listed as one of the Sports and recreation good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Good topic starEmil Fischer (American football executive) is part of the Green Bay Packers presidents series, a good topic. This is identified as among the best series of articles produced by the Wikipedia community. If you can update or improve it, please do so.
Article milestones
DateProcessResult
August 6, 2019Good article nomineeListed
April 1, 2024Good topic candidatePromoted
Current status: Good article

GA Review[edit]

This review is transcluded from Talk:Emil R. Fischer/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 20:34, 4 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Comments

  • "Emil Fischer was born on August 15, 1887 in Plymouth, Wisconsin[1] and moved to Green Bay, Wisconsin in 1908.[2]" commas after 1887, Wisconsin and Wisconsin.
  • I agree with the first one, disagree with the last two. A comma isn't need when connecting two clauses with "and". And the last one just doesn't sound right. No natural pause when I speak it out loud. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 14:54, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • Well Wisconsin is a disambiguator, so I disagree with your disagreement. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 14:59, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • I always win.... Srsly, all good and thanks for the link, I can never remember that. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 19:14, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He got his start in" was this because someone let him get his start or could it be "He started in..."?
  • "travelling " in USEng, isn't that "traveling"?
  • "around the country trying to get large cheese companies to open up plants in the city" reads odd to me "the city" when one is travelling around the country...
  • "began establishing himself as a successful businessman in Green Bay in the 1920s" could just tighten that to "established himself"
  • " supporter of the team " this in a new section probably needs clarification, just " supporter of the Green Bay Packers" would be fine.
  • " in 1926[6] and to the executive committee in 1935.[4] " I don't think it would do any harm to move [6] to the end of the sentence, it's aesthetically jarring where it's currently placed.
  • Be consistent with relinking, e.g. you relink Green Bay Packers Inc., but not NFL.
  • " the Packers training facility " shouldn't that be " the Packers' training facility "?
  • " the Packers articles of incorporation" similarly.
  • " died on January 2, 1958 at" comma after 1958.

All trivial stuff really, so I'll put it on hold pending discussions. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 09:50, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the review The Rambling Man, all fixed or responded to. Hope you enjoyed The Ashes! « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 14:54, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I'll take one final pass later and let you know (or just tweak the sub-trivial things I find). The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 19:14, 5 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good, literally, so I'll promoted. Nice work. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 09:34, 6 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks The Rambling Man, appreciate the review. « Gonzo fan2007 (talk) @ 16:15, 6 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]
You're welcome. Happy to take any other requests, depending on my workload. The Rambling Man (REJOICE!) 16:43, 6 August 2019 (UTC)[reply]