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Talk:Eric Lock/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: MisterBee1966 (talk · contribs) 16:11, 3 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Comments by MisterBee1966

[edit]
Lead
  • "Lock had his first taste of flying as a teenage but showed little further interest in flying until 1939" I find this a bit too colloquial! Maybe start with where and when he was born.
  • "He joined the RAF": first use of RAF should not be abbreviated
  • "offensive sweeps": is this a well known term for a offensive fighter patrols? Maybe link to combat air patrol?
  • nickname "Sawn Off Lockie": is not cited
Battle of Britain
  • link first use of Luftwaffe
  • "Lock flew as Red 2" is that a position or his aircraft?
  • "Lock followed it down. He quickly realised his mistake but it was too late." Why was it a mistake. Too colloquail I think
Last battles and death
  • "well-known RAF aces" well known to whom? Could be seen as POV
List of victories
  • (JG 54 — or Fighter Wing 54) and others: strike the or

Ok done. Dapi89 (talk) 22:13, 7 December 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Early life and career
  • last sentence, 2nd paragraph not referenced
Last battles and death
  • 2nd paragraph not referenced
Channel Front
  • 1st paragraph not referenced