Talk:Eusèbe Jaojoby/GA1
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Reviewer: GreatOrangePumpkin (talk · contribs) 11:50, 11 January 2012 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- "He is the most enduringly popular of the originators of the salegy style that emerged in the 1970s." - Too POVy, how about "He is often cited as one of the originators of salegy, a style that emerged in the 1970s."
- "at home" Is this true?
- "He is widely referred to as the "King of Salegy".[2]" merge this with the second-last sentence
- I would add the {{Infobox Musician}}
- "or experimenting with
the performance ofMalagasy musical styles using electric guitar, bass and drum kit.[2]"
- "or experimenting with
- "Although no
oneperson can be credited with creating the modern salegy genre, " or remove instead "person"
- "Although no
- "Desiring more freedom to write songs and further develop the syncretic modern salegy style led Jaojoby to leave Los Matadores in 1975 for The Players, another regional band that was less well-established but more willing to take risks." incomplete sentence? I hardly understand this.
- "before disbanding in 1979" do you know why?
- "Jaojoby was approached by a stranger " is he still a stranger?
- "Donat to contribute several recordings to the first
eversalegy compilation album"
- "Donat to contribute several recordings to the first
- "leading a newspaper to declare him the "King of Salegy"." do you know which?
- "
deeply divisive2001 presidential elections.[2]" not important to his biography
- "
- "semi-live conditions on the island of Reunion.[1]" - what is "semi-live"?
- "prestigious and historic" - Remove this
- It is important to explain why this concert is different from all the others he's done in France. The Olympia is kind of the French equivalent of Carnegie Hall. Lemurbaby (talk) 04:24, 15 January 2012 (UTC)
- "The antsa is a group style common " what is a "group style"?
- "syncopated " link this
- "accordion" ditto
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- How reliable are
- Ref 1
- How reliable are
- a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- Ref 4
- Ref 5
- Ref 9
- Ref 13
- Ref 16
- Ref 18
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- See above
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail:
- Thank you for offering to review this article, Great Orange Pumpkin! Jaojoby is a very important figure in Malagasy music (which is itself incredibly rich and interesting), so I hope you'll enjoy working with me on this review. I'm committed to making whatever changes need to be made for the article to meet GA level. This is the first "musician article" I've written. I modeled it on other GA and FA musician articles but look forward to your feedback where it needs further improvement to meet the standards for articles of this type. Cheers, Lemurbaby (talk) 04:28, 14 January 2012 (UTC)