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Talk:Girl (Destiny's Child song)/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Prism (talk · contribs) 17:50, 22 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]


Checklist

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GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

  1. Is it reasonably well written?
    A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:
    The prose has some issues, which are pointed out below.
    B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
  2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
    A. Has an appropriate reference section:
    B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:
    C. No original research:
    Per this Wiki essay, I reccomend adding a source to the music video plot (preferably using Cite AV Media, but I'll leave that up to you since using templates for refs aren't part of the GA criteria)
  3. Is it broad in its coverage?
    A. Major aspects:
    B. Focused:
  4. Is it neutral?
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. Is it stable?
    No edit wars, etc:
  6. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
    A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
    B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
  7. Overall:
    Pass or Fail:

Comments

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Lead

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  • I do like the fact that you opted for a different structure on the lead (well, at least of the first sentences). However, it doesn't work very well as the second sentence goes on and on forever. You could end it on "and Douthit", and the next sentence could be "Columbia Records released it as the third single from the group's fourth studio album Destiny Fulfilled (2004) on January 16, 2005."
  • Even though the lead states that Williams helped write the song, "written for Rowland" is a bit misleading. While I do get it, it may be confusing for readers; maybe "Sampling "Ocean of Thoughts and Dreams" by The Dramatics, the soul song was written about an abusive relationship Rowland went through during the time of writing."
  • "was considered a minor single" this is already implied
  • "former country" → former
  • "An accompanying" → A

Background and release

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  • "plea" is the word used on the Digital Spy article
  • Remove further from "Rowland further elaborated"
  • " as subsequent singles, "Cater 2 U" and "Stand Up for Love" were both released in the US only." Wouldn't this be better in a note (such as the ones used in Beyoncé (album))? And it also needs sourcing
  • "The single itself" (What format? Itself is redundant also)

Composition

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  • "tries to convince them" of what?
  • The part following the semi-colon could stand alone as a sentence

Critical reception

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  • Remove "While reviewing Destiny Fulfilled," "shortly" and "In a review of that same album,"

Music video

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  • "In the following scene, he is naked except for a pair of boxers" Describe his reaction as well

Live performances

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  • "and later "I'll Take You There" (1972) was" what?

References

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I think that everything is  Done. My love is love (talk) 18:59, 22 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Yeah; I'm now promoting it to GA. You know what? Your GAN of "Girl" actually made me want to go to the attic and search for my old CD of Destiny Fulfilled! I'm now replaying this song over and over. pedro | talk 19:47, 22 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]