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Talk:Hubert Maga/GA1

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GA Review

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Second opinion

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I agree with the comments made by Ling.Nut. There are a few issues that stand out for me:

  • The prose needs some serious attention. A few examples:

If you are using an established format that does not require the author of a chapter to be cited, please let me know.

FA Musings When I was looking at this article, I simply typed in "Hubert Maga" and searched Google books. It was an eye-opening experience. This article currently takes entirely for granted chunks of background knowledge that are crucial to the reader's understanding of the political context: esp., the country being divided into three de facto tribal zones (what tribes each region?), tribalism, the number of coups, etc. If you read all the article and think carefully about the events, you can perceive most of this... but it shouldn't require such inductive reasoning. Please rewrite it extensively before taking it into FAC, or I will surely reappear in my role as Cranky Old SOB and scream bloody murder. :-) Give the reader a clear understanding of the background. No no no this is not a threat. I'm trying to let you know this so you can work on it. Ling.Nut (talkWP:3IAR) 10:52, 15 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, I'll try to expand on the background. I don't think anything on the coups are particularly relevant to Maga other than what I have already stated. Is the material in the "Background" section at 1963 Dahomeyan coup d'etat what you are envisioning? ~EDDY (talk/contribs/editor review)~ 00:42, 20 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Recap

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Ling.Nut has asked me to take over this review, which I've agreed to do. I think the best way to bring this to a conclusion is to take a final thorough look through the article and list what still remains to be done, which I'll do over the next day or so. In the meantime, can you address Ling's point about Dahomey's political background and tribalism?

--Malleus Fatuorum 14:41, 15 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Note that there is a more recent revised 1995 third edition of Decalo's work on Dahomey/Benin, which may be useful for this article. See WP:Good article reassessment/Jean-Baptiste Hachème/1. Geometry guy 23:38, 16 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'm concerned about the missing political background, and in particular the tribalism present in Dahomey during Maga's time. I'm unconvinced that this addition to the lead: "He arose on a political scene where one's power was dictated by what region in Dahomey they lived" does the topic justice. I think we need to have a short background section describing what the tribal divisions in the country were, and greater clarity surrounding the tribal allegiances of each of the main protagonists in this story. What tribes are there anyway? What proportion of the general population belongs to each?
  • It appears to be significant that Maga converted to Christianity, but I get no idea of what that significance was from this article.

I'm reluctantly going to have to close this nomination now, as not listed. The article has improved substantially during this extended review, but it still does not meet the good article criteria, specifically falling short in its coverage (3a) and prose quality (1a). If you disagree with this assessment then you can nominate the article at WP:GAR for a community review. --Malleus Fatuorum 23:40, 22 January 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.