"finally encounters it however" Remove the last word.
"leading Finn to wanting to discover" Doesn't sound right.
"who stow away" You mean stows?
"but Finn and Susan are able to fight them." Did they "fight" the jellyfish or tried to get them off Jake?
"After Jake complains" I'd replace the first word.
"Later Finn, Alva and her pet bear encounter" I would restructure this part.
"She approaches Dr. Gross if they can live off the island." Doesn't sound right.
"But now that Finn" Not the best word to start a sentence.
"for parts unknown" How about 'for unknown reasons'?
In regards to the entire "Plot" section, I have fixed the above errors and copy-edited the section. Here are the changes--Gen. Quon(Talk) 18:51, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]
I'm not really sure what you mean here.--Gen. Quon(Talk) 18:51, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Mistake on my part.
"and so the robot returns to Finn" Remove and.
"and so she approaches" Remove and.
"Dr. Gross, however, convinces her" However isn't needed.
"Kara stops Frieda from leaving and drags her away crying." Was she controlled at that time?
"Flashbacks detail how Minerva, a nurse, met Finn's father Martin Mertins when he was hospitalized after it was mistakenly believed he was attempting to leave the island with a group of escapees." So that moment caused the flashbacks to happen?
"Now that Finn is here with her, however, she expresses" Doesn't sound right.
"on December 9, Cartoon Network" If the art crew released the statement on their Tumblr, I don't think it'd be on CN's behalf.
Rewritten to clearly express it was released via the crew Tumblr.--Gen. Quon(Talk) 18:51, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]
The Blumenfeld quote is too long, I recommend removing some things, and keeping what's important.
I have trimmed it by a sentence or two.--Gen. Quon(Talk) 18:51, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Per [1], you're going to have to make it shorter, or paraphrase what you kept.
Some references link to social networking sites, but since I was able to confirm that they are associated with Cartoon Network and AT staff, I'll accept it in good faith.
Good work on the article. When you resolve or provide explanations to my concerns, I'll look it over. -- 1989 15:58, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]
@1989: Thank you for the review. I have responded to and/or complied with your requests. How does it look now?--Gen. Quon(Talk) 18:51, 11 June 2017 (UTC)[reply]