Talk:Joseph A. Lopez/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 19:44, 18 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]


Comments

  • "1781 – 1841" unspaced.
  • " lasted only several months" reads curiously to me, maybe replace several with "a matter of"?
  • " to St. Inigoes, Maryland, he garnered a" seems to be missing something like "where".
  • "sent to St. Inigoes, Maryland, he garnered a reputation" in what capacity?
  • Do we know how many children there were in total?
    • The sources says at least four, but seems to suggest there were more than that. I don't have an exact number. Ergo Sum 14:25, 19 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Huarte enrolled her daughters in the Georgetown Visitation Academy, which two of the daugheters" probably no need to repeat (and mis-spell!) daughter in this context.
  • You have "Georgetown College" as a pipe twice but with different links, that's confusing.
  • Lead has "first pres of college" and prose has "first pres of university". In the UK these are different things, so perhaps we can align the nomenclature here?
  • "The only notable event that occurred..." this is somewhat POV.
    • Fair. That's how the source puts it, but I've rephrased. Ergo Sum 14:28, 19 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • "His presidency lasted only several months, before he became ill,[4] and was succeeded " same comment re: "only several", and the lead suggested he resigned, but that doesn't seem to be mentioned here?
    • I've rephrased again. I've kept resignation though, because he resigned due to illness. Ergo Sum 14:29, 19 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  • No need to link coffin.

Short article, well constructed, just a few brief notes above, so I'll put it on hold while we go through them. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 08:00, 19 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.