Talk:Keelin Winters/GA1
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Reviewer: Kaiser matias (talk · contribs) 03:17, 9 May 2017 (UTC)
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- ..."last played for Seattle Reign FC of the NWSL..." Shouldn't it be "the Seattle Reign FC", or is that a style used for soccer clubs I'm unaware of?
- "She was a member of the senior national team's player pool and was allocated by U.S. Soccer during the NWSL Player Allocation." So does this mean she was with the senior team, or not? It's unclear.
- "She played collegiate soccer for the University of Portland and was named West Coast Conference (WCC) Player of the Year in 2010." This is at the end of a paragraph regarding her international experience; wouldn't it be more appropriate to move it to the first paragraph, just for uniformity?
- In the early life section, isn't it reasonable to link to Brian Winters, considering he has a page and is notable enough to mention his own career?
- "She has five siblings." Any idea about them, like brothers or sisters?
- "She was also named National Team of the Week on two separate occasions." She was named the team itself, or to the team?
- "In 2010, she was named West Coast Conference (WCC) Player of the Year." Is there anyway to either add this to a preceding paragraph or expand on it so it's not just a one-line paragraph?
- "During the 2011 WPS season, she recorded three goals and two assists during the regular season." In how many games?
- "The team finished second in the Western Conference with a 10–3–1 record." Clarify if that record is win-loss-tie or win-tie-loss. I see that this is noted later in the section, but this and a few other cases don't have that note attached to it.
- "...during the 2012/2013 season with eight starts." Earlier in the article a season is listed as "2006–2007," whereas this case is different. Keep consistency throughout, using just one of these styles.
- "...lone game-winning goal.." If it's the lone goal, isn't it by definition the game-winner?
- The image in the "Seattle Reign FC, 2013–2016" section should have a note on what player is Winters (either the left or right player).
- "Winters had previously announced her retirement following the end of the season." This is a really weird sentence. It would be better to go with something like: "Winters retired at the end of the season; she had previously announced her intentions to do so," or something along those lines.
- Is there any reason for a lack of a statistics section in the article? Most soccer articles have it, so I'd assume this would to.
- It would mostly be a duplication of what's already in the infobox. For other GAs for players who have scored international goals (like Megan Rapinoe, for example, there are more details to include - but not in this case. Hmlarson (talk) 05:52, 9 May 2017 (UTC)
- In general the article could really use some copyediting, as the writing is rather mechanical and stiff. It would really serve to help the article to make it flow better.
- References: 1, 2, 7, 13, 18, 19, 21, 47 are all deadlinks.
- External links: The "Seattle Sounders Women player profile" is a deadlink.
That's about it for now. Kaiser matias (talk) 03:17, 9 May 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking a look and providing feedback Kaiser matias. When you have a chance, can you let me know if any other changes needed? Hmlarson (talk) 21:13, 10 May 2017 (UTC)
- Yeah I saw you went through the article. I plan to look it over once again when I have a proper amount of time; don't want to rush through it of course. Should be done in a day or so. Kaiser matias (talk) 02:10, 11 May 2017 (UTC)
- And took a look. Much improved now. Kaiser matias (talk) 12:07, 11 May 2017 (UTC)
- Yeah I saw you went through the article. I plan to look it over once again when I have a proper amount of time; don't want to rush through it of course. Should be done in a day or so. Kaiser matias (talk) 02:10, 11 May 2017 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking a look and providing feedback Kaiser matias. When you have a chance, can you let me know if any other changes needed? Hmlarson (talk) 21:13, 10 May 2017 (UTC)