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More detailed introduction

[edit]

Hi to any editors watching this (very new) page. I'd like to proposed a longer introduction for this article, to address the tag on the page. As you can see from the connected contributor template above, I do have a financial conflict of interest with this topic as I am working as a consultant to the NFLPA, for whom (and with whose input) I prepared the original draft of this article. Due to that, I won't make any edits to the article, preferring instead that editors review my suggestions and make what edits seem appropriate.

Based on Becky Sayles' feedback regarding the introduction, I've put together a longer version and share it below for editors to take a look. If this seems like an improvement on the current introduction, I hope someone will add this to the article.

Proposed expanded intro

The National Football League collective bargaining agreement is a labor agreement which reflects the results of collective bargaining negotiations between the National Football League Players Association (NFLPA) and National Football League (NFL) team owners. The labor agreement classifies distribution of league revenues, sets health and safety standards and establishes benefits, including pensions and medical benefits, for all players in the NFL. The first collective bargaining agreement was reached in 1968 after player members of the NFLPA voted to go on strike to increase salaries, pensions and benefits for all players in the league. Later negotiations of the collective bargaining agreement called for injury grievances, a guaranteed percentage of revenues for players, an expansion of free agency and other issues impacting the business of the NFL. The NFLPA and team owners have negotiated seven different agreements since 1968.

Most recently, in 2011, players and team owners reached a collective bargaining agreement after a player lockout and court-ordered mediation. The currently active agreement was ratified in 2011 and extends through the 2020 season, and includes changes to league revenue distribution, increases in player benefits and health and safety improvements including major limits on offseason, preseason and regular season practice activities.
Markup

The '''National Football League collective bargaining agreement''' is a [[labour law|labor agreement]] which reflects the results of collective bargaining negotiations between the [[National Football League Players Association]] (NFLPA) and [[National Football League]] (NFL) team owners. The labor agreement classifies distribution of league revenues, sets health and safety standards and establishes benefits, including pensions and medical benefits, for all players in the NFL. The first collective bargaining agreement was reached in 1968 after player members of the NFLPA voted to go on strike to increase salaries, pensions and benefits for all players in the league. Later negotiations of the collective bargaining agreement called for injury grievances, a guaranteed percentage of revenues for players, an expansion of [[free agent|free agency]] and other issues impacting the business of the NFL. The NFLPA and team owners have negotiated seven different agreements since 1968.

Most recently, in 2011, players and team owners reached a collective bargaining agreement after a player [[2011 NFL lockout|lockout]] and court-ordered mediation. The currently active agreement was ratified in 2011 and extends through the 2020 season, and includes changes to league revenue distribution, increases in player benefits and health and safety improvements including major limits on offseason, preseason and regular season practice activities.

Thanks in advance for taking a look. The above is a proposed wording, so I'm open to any adjustments that might be needed. Let me know if you have any questions. 16912 Rhiannon (Talk · COI) 21:06, 30 January 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I see absolutely no issues with this introduction. Sorry you had to wait so long for someone to notice it! Toa Nidhiki05 19:16, 4 March 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks so much! 16912 Rhiannon (Talk · COI) 14:55, 10 March 2015 (UTC)[reply]