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Talk:Peniel E. Joseph

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Crossing over into puff

[edit]

In addition to being a frequent national commentator on issues of race, democracy, civil rights, Joseph wrote the award-winning books ...

These breathless, full-sentence modifiers (subordinated into the passive voice) are not a good look in an encyclopedia. Smaller violations are often tolerated, but the combined effect here of this sentence and the surrounding text is creeping into puff territory.

Additionally, the entire lead provides no outbound links to any page concerning the black power movement, or appropriate sub-genre. — MaxEnt 19:43, 6 February 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Puff? No--it's all factual and relevant. Rjensen (talk) 12:52, 14 January 2023 (UTC)[reply]