Talk:Pokey Allen/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Kaiser matias (talk · contribs) 02:09, 8 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:

In the lead, clarify the football; either say "American and Canadian football," or just "gridiron football."
- Done ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 15:55, 30 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Lead could also be expanded, perhaps noting played briefly and then served as an assistant and DC for several years before noting his specific head coaching positions.
- Done I've gone a bit vague, just saying he held assistant and position coaching positions. (The defensive coordinator is also considered an assistant coach.) ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 15:55, 30 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]
"As a quarterback and cornerback in his senior season in 1964..." This is the only mention of what position he played during college. Was it the same for his first few years as well, or did he play a different position? Needs to be clarified.

Did he stay as a QB and CB in the CFL? I'm not the most familiar with football, but would think he would have only done one, so it should be clarified.
- Mostly as a defensive back, although he did spend some time as a backup QB apparently. I see no evidence he was used as a QB in games, so I'll focus on his defensive role. Done ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 17:53, 2 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Note after British Columbia Lions the abbreviation "BC Lions," as its both used in the infobox, the more common name of the team (at least in Canada), and BC is used later in the article. As a BC native, feel I should say its funny to see the team referred like that, as it is never done; always just the BC Lions.
- You're right, that's never done; I replaced British Columbia Lions with BC Lions instead. Done ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 17:54, 2 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]
"He retired from his playing career before the 1968 season began." Can just say "He retired prior to the 1968 season."
- Done ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 17:54, 2 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]
"Allen coached the Vikings..." Clarify the Vikings is the name for Portland State. Easy way to do that would be in the previous sentence: "he became the coach for the Portland State University Vikings" or something like that.
- Done ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 17:55, 2 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Is there any information about his life outside of football? Like family or anything like that? Would be prudent to add if so.

That's about all I can see with the article. Once addressed I'll go through it again and see, but should be good then. Kaiser matias (talk) 02:09, 8 July 2017 (UTC)[reply]

I have two more comments to address, both of which will require a bit of research. I'll have to respond to those in about a week and a half, since I have some life-impacting exams approaching. ~ Rob₁₃^Talk 17:56, 2 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Not a problem, life-impacting exams are far more important. And considering I just took a month to address my own GAC, I can't exactly hold you to a time-limit. Just send me a message when you get it done, there's no rush, and I'd rather it be done slow and well, than fast and poorly. Kaiser matias (talk) 11:56, 5 August 2017 (UTC)[reply]

It's been two months since anything has gone on here, and while I'm reluctant to fail it, if there's no active effort to improve it then it's just taking up a spot on the GAC list. If they get addressed it can be re-added, and more than likely passed quickly. Kaiser matias (talk) 09:29, 10 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]