Talk:Rosetta Lawson/GA1
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Reviewer: PCN02WPS (talk · contribs) 22:55, 18 April 2022 (UTC)
I'll be reviewing this nomination, comments are below and the article is on hold. PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 22:55, 18 April 2022 (UTC)
Overall
[edit]- Since the subject of the article is American, I believe dates should be in mdy format. (I've done this myself with a script since there were some irregularities in the referencing dates as well.)
Lead/infobox
[edit]- No problems.
Family and education
[edit]- a comma is needed after "King George County, Virginia" per MOS:GEOCOMMA
- "when she was 5," → "when she was five," per MOS:SPELL09
- "Washington, DC" → "Washington, D.C." (occurs twice in the first paragraph of this section, once in the second paragraph, and twice in the second paragraph of the "Advocacy" section
- A comma is needed after "D.C." in all instances where it is not the end of the sentence per GEOCOMMA
- "Lawson would go on to" → "Lawson went on to"
- "chiropractic" can be made lowercase
- "a lawyer, educator, and activist" → comma after "activist"
- comma after "Nanjemoy, Maryland" per GEOCOMMA
- "Jessie Lawson died on 8 November 1927." → since his full name is given two sentences earlier, you can get away with just "Jessie" here
Activism
[edit]- comma needed after "and in 1896"
- "The club was a civic organization created with the initial purpose..." → simplify to "The civic organization was created with the initial purpose..." to avoid any redundancy
- "in response to a letter written by the president of the Missouri Press Association that challenged the respectability of African American women" → add missing word
- "The NACWC is still active..." → sentence needs to start with
{{As of|2022}}
to read As of 2022[update], the NACWC is still active..." - "and works to uplift the African American community and promote racial harmony." → reads as being a touch promotional and praising the organization
- "Lawson would establish" → "Lawson established"
- Since the abbreviation "YWCA" is used in the sentence following the first mention of the organization with its full name and link, the abbreviation should be given right after the link, as in "Young Women's Christian Association (YWCA)"
- a comma is needed after "Plainsfield, New Jersey" per GEOCOMMA
- "They later founded the Inter-Denominational Bible College, with her husband, Jessie Lawson, as its president." → plural/singular pronouns conflict here, perhaps remove "her husband" or reword the beginning of the sentence?
Death and legacy
[edit]- Page 2 of the source gives the title as "Diverse Histories of American Sociology", in typical title case.
- Is there any more about her legacy that can be found? If not, that's fine, but a little more would be great.
References
[edit]- Ref No. 2 gives a 404 error.
- The title of Ref No. 8 should just be "Our Mission", with the "website" field reading "National Association of Colored Women's Clubs".
- Ref No. 11 does not need the address/city/zip of the Library of Congress
- Ref No. 13 should be formatted as a "cite news" as the source is a newspaper (The San Francisco Call, Volume 86, Number 48), publication date July 18, 1899.
- Add links to websites: No. 4 (Gale Research), 6 (The Washington Times), 8 (National Association of Colored Women's Clubs), 9 (Evening Star), 10 (Evening Star), 11 (Library of Congress), 12 (The Washington Post), 15 (The New York Age), and 17 (Evening Star).
Nomination comments
[edit]- Thanks, I'll take care of this over the next few days. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 23:17, 18 April 2022 (UTC)
- @ScottishFinnishRadish Sounds good, no rush! PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 01:06, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- I took care of everything on the list, except the issue with ref 2. I'm not sure exactly how best to write up this ref. The ref already links to the archived content at https://web.archive.org/web/20100528093903/http://www.loc.gov/teachers/classroommaterials/connections/traveling-culture/history.html Should I just use cite web and use that URL as the basis? Thanks for your time. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 11:54, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- I think I got that cite fixed up as well. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 13:25, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- Oh, I also looked for more on her legacy when writing the article. Notable Black American women notes that she basically fell off the radar in her later years, so it doesn't seem like she remained active enough to have a lot of legacy stuff. The renaming of the WCTU chapter happened during her active period, so that's not really legacy. I'd love to find more, but I wasn't able to dig anything up. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 12:05, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- Everything looks good (I made a couple of minor fixes myself, didn't want to hold this up just for a few commas), and the legacy section isn't an issue - not much you can do when there aren't any sources. This was an interesting read and a very well-written article, so I'm happy to give this a pass. Well done! PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 15:21, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you kindly. I appreciate the review. I can't believe I missed a stray DC when I was going through making fixes. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 15:23, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- Everything looks good (I made a couple of minor fixes myself, didn't want to hold this up just for a few commas), and the legacy section isn't an issue - not much you can do when there aren't any sources. This was an interesting read and a very well-written article, so I'm happy to give this a pass. Well done! PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 15:21, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- I took care of everything on the list, except the issue with ref 2. I'm not sure exactly how best to write up this ref. The ref already links to the archived content at https://web.archive.org/web/20100528093903/http://www.loc.gov/teachers/classroommaterials/connections/traveling-culture/history.html Should I just use cite web and use that URL as the basis? Thanks for your time. ScottishFinnishRadish (talk) 11:54, 19 April 2022 (UTC)
- @ScottishFinnishRadish Sounds good, no rush! PCN02WPS (talk | contribs) 01:06, 19 April 2022 (UTC)