Talk:Sebastian Kurz/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Shushugah (talk · contribs) 22:00, 1 January 2022 (UTC)
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Initial review
[edit]Immediately while reading the lede, I was unclear if I was reading the lede or already beginning the article. It's too long and does not adequately summarize the most important points, for example it continues with his personal life, and yet immediately after is another section on his personal life. I believe the lede can be shortened to 1-2 paragraphs maximum. It's only all the way in the bottom, that I even learn where Thiel is currently working (With Thiel Capital, something that likely should be in the lede).
Some sections like Sebastian Kurz#Cabinet composition could be removed entirely, as they don't relate to Sebastian Kurz as a person, but merely his administration.
References
[edit]With 300 references, and less than 20 of them in English, it will take some time to properly verify the references especially on more contentious points. So far though, looking at the newspapers sourced, it's primarily reliable and secondary German/Austrian newspapers. The number of citations per claim is sometimes more than 4-5, which makes it unclear if they're all necessary or just padding.
In some cases, unreliable sources from BILD are used along with 3-4 other sources, for example in Kurz' stepping down in 2021 and should be removed per Wikipedia:Reliable_sources/Perennial_sources#Bild, but with 4-5 other sources, it makes it unclear what specific claim each source is making. For example the latest claim about Kurz joining Peter Thiel is a simple claim, with a mixture of English and German references. In this case, a single reference from Reuters would have been sufficient.
This is not a pass yet, but with some work and tightening up layout/sourcing/focus it will be a good article. ~ 🦝 Shushugah (he/him • talk) 22:00, 1 January 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you for taking the time to review this. Note that I'm still "actively" (trying) to improve the wording and grammar of some sections. I had hoped that I would be done with that before the review began so that the article would be mostly stable but unfortunately... I was too lazy.
- Kurz working for Thiel Capital barely received any news coverage. It is not just common but convention for former chancellors or other high-ranking Austrian politicians to be invited by companies to serve on their board or in some managerial position. So I don't really think it's worth a mention in the lead (for now at least).
- It's true that the cabinet composition sections in their current shape are rather suboptimal and in need of change. Regardless, cabinet compositions are immensely important as the office of the chancellor is powerless and the incumbent must exercise their de facto powers through the ministers. Hence, the chancellor as a person, is dependent on their ministers. Furthermore, his cabinets were historically exceptional in multiple ways, which personally defined him in the eye of the public too. Anyways, I'm gonna try to improve them nevertheless and highlight their significance in his political career. Colonestarrice (talk) 23:26, 1 January 2022 (UTC)
- After taking a look at Peter Thiel (which I didn't know before), giving the fact that Kurz is working for him a mention in the lead does seem wise. Colonestarrice (talk) 23:35, 1 January 2022 (UTC)
Removed all Bild sources. Colonestarrice (talk) 23:45, 1 January 2022 (UTC)
Lead trimmed, his new job is now mentioned in the lead, and all post-politics section refs except for Reuters have been removed. Colonestarrice (talk) 00:09, 2 January 2022 (UTC)
Cabinet composition sections reworked; their significance in his political career is now clearer and I removed the ministers not nominated by Kurz. Colonestarrice (talk) 00:41, 2 January 2022 (UTC)
- Colonestarrice nice work! It's really moving forward! I fixed some obvious typos/formatting inconsistencies myself and I'll wait a few more days, but I think this article is on the right track! There are numerous places where German sources could be replaced by existing English sources still.
I still think it focuses too much on broad Austrian politics at times, when a shorter/summary style of Sebastian Kurz' actions/connections to a topic would help, e.g see last edit I made. In some cases/topics, a positions section would be useful to adequately summarize his views/actions over the years, for example on Islam(aphobia), integration, security etc.. keep up the good work! I think within a week this will be GA ready. ~ 🦝 Shushugah (he/him • talk) 15:43, 2 January 2022 (UTC)
- Colonestarrice congratulations on the good article status and thank you for incorporating my feedback and continuously improving the article! ~ 🦝 Shushugah (he/him • talk) 15:44, 3 January 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you! I was just about the implement your last requests. I think having a section that summarizes his Islam-related policies and views is a very good idea. Anyways, thanks a lot. Colonestarrice (talk) 15:57, 3 January 2022 (UTC)