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Talk:So (album)/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: SNUGGUMS (talk · contribs) 05:54, 7 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]


Hello, thank you for taking this on! I'm just letting you know that my laptop screen has smashed (think on these lines :/) and so I'm currently hooked up to an old external monitor until I can take it to be repaired. I think this won't take more than 48 hours, but if I'm late replying to some comments then just know it's because of that. Cheers, —JennKR | ☎ 20:38, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
O_O that's a scary sight for technology! As long as my comments below are all addressed by September 21st, we'll have no problems at all and I'll pass the GAN. Snuggums (talk / edits) 21:05, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
And I have absolutely no idea how it has happened either, I just flipped the lid and I think that face (O_O) perfectly sums up my expression on seeing what was there. I think everything should be definitely fixed by the 21st, I'll keep you updated if not. —JennKR | ☎ 21:09, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Its fixed! I should be normally responsive now :) —JennKR | ☎ 21:39, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Yay :D Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Infobox
  • Just using "rock" would be simpler than its subgenres "pop rock" and "art rock"
  • Comment: Actually, I believe the album was released as Passion and retitled on subsequent pressings (I'll find a source to confirm this though). —JennKR | ☎ 21:39, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'll wait for you to find a source before deciding Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Retitled due to "legal barriers" according to Gabriel in the liner notes of the 2002 rerelease. I've included this in the note. —JennKR | ☎ 22:41, 18 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • It would help to have specific release dates for the singles
  • Comment: I've consulted lots of sources looking for these but the months are the closest I can get. —JennKR | ☎ 21:39, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • In that case, the song articles need to be changed as well for potential WP:OR Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Lead
  • Information on the title and Gabriel's taste for titles is trivial
  • Not Done—Gabriel was notorious for not titling his albums, leaving his fans to make up nicknames which effectively became the official title (which Gabriel, his label and journalists would use). The fact that he was almost forced to do so by his label is significant to its release and significant in explaining why this album is titled quite strangely. —JennKR | ☎ 21:58, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment: Just to add, I've expanded on, and clarified, its significance. —JennKR | ☎ 22:05, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "commercially accessible"..... awkward word choice
  • Done—removed "commercially". —JennKR | ☎ 23:57, 17 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • include what critics particularly praised about the album
  • Done
  • Some details on commercial aspects on the other singles would be nice, even if not as prominent as "SledgeHammer"
  • Not Done—as (excl. "Sledgehammer") they were generally moderately succesful or succesful in one territory and I think listing them is as much mention as they need. —JennKR | ☎ 00:10, 18 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Background
  • Much of this seems to be on Gabriel's career with Genesis and his previous solo albums, I would instead include information that pertains specifically to this album as what's in here now seems better off in his main article.
  • Done There isn't a great deal to say about the early 80s, but I've refocused the content on this. —JennKR | ☎ 22:51, 17 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Better..... but honestly the first paragraph is purely fluff that has nothing to do with this album. I'm tempted to say that the second paragraph should be merged into the next section as "background and recording".
  • Noted. I'm going to look over this with some biographies at hand tomorrow, and see if I can find more pertinent material. —JennKR | ☎ 00:07, 18 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Sounds good, that first paragraph just needs to be removed/replaced completely. Snuggums (talk / edits) 00:48, 18 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • UPDATE: I've removed that first paragraph myself, looks so much better without it :). Let's get going Jenn! Snuggums (talk / edits) 04:14, 19 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Aside from these releases, Gabriel founded the World Music, Arts and Dance Festival (WOMAD), releasing a WOMAD album featuring himself, Robert Fripp, Pete Townshend and other world music artists"..... needs a citation
Composition
Side One
  • "Gabriel's voice is prominent on the track"..... reads awkwardly
  • "most significant political statement"..... prominent would be more neutral
Side two
  • "Its lyrics, that satirise the yuppie culture of the 1980s, as well as materialism and consumerism, are the result of Gabriel's self-examination, after he considered whether he may have desired fame after all"..... let's remove "as well as" after "1980s", remove "that" after "lyrics", add an "and" after "consumerism"
Release
  • See note about regarding album title info
  • Comment: See earlier response. —JennKR | ☎ 21:58, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Shouldn't singles and promotion have their own sections?
  • Not Done—don't think that would be beneficial (and plus the artwork and titling are not really part of promotion). —JennKR | ☎ 00:07, 18 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Critical reception
  • Unlink Jon Pareles and The New York Times
  • Include Lynn Van Matre as the reviewer's name from Chicago Tribune
References
  • Shouldn't the "notes" have their own section?
  • I don't think that's required. —JennKR | ☎ 21:07, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • FN6: Link Stephen Thomas Erlewine, unlink AllMusic
  • FN20: YouTube is generally discouraged as a source- it can lead to copyright issues in some cases, other instances are often user-generated
  • WP:VIDEOREF: There are channels on YouTube for videos uploaded by agencies and organizations that are generally considered reliable sources. I would argue a Google Talk constitutes this, especially as it has been uploaded by Google.
  • Certainly reliable when it's from an official channel, though I was worried about potential copyright per WP:YOUTUBE and WP:NOYT. While this could be an exception, it's generally better to have non-YouTube links, particularly when high-quality secondary sources are available. Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:07, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • NOTE: This is my final concern. If this is an exception to WP:NOYT and WP:YOUTUBE, I'll accept it. Otherwise, we'll have to find something else. 2 days remain. Snuggums (talk / edits) 04:17, 19 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment: @SNUGGUMS: I believe this would qualify as the exception WP:YOUTUBE and WP:NOYT describe. —JennKR | ☎ 11:48, 19 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • FN's 49 and 64: Unlink Rolling Stone
  • FN82: reliable?
  • I'm guessing this is Ultimate Classic Rock (and not Amazon)? I think you're right to question this and I'll find an alternative. —JennKR | ☎ 21:07, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • FN83: Remove "Inc." from "Amazon.com, Inc"
  • FN84: Should read "Erlewine, Stephen Thomas" rather than "Stephen Thomas, Erlewine"
  • FN85: Same as FN83
  • FN86: page number(s)?
  • I didn't insert this ref nor have access to it. —JennKR | ☎ 21:07, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • If you ever do gain access, this will help (particularly if taking this to FAC) Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • This is automatically put in by a template, so I'm assuming it should be there. —JennKR | ☎ 21:07, 14 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Done—all of the above, except where noted. —JennKR | ☎ 21:58, 15 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
GA Result
  • On hold for seven days
  • UPDATE: JennKR I've struck everything that's been addressed. We're almost there! Snuggums (talk / edits) 02:02, 16 September 2014 (UTC)[reply]
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