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Template:Did you know nominations/Mattie Edwards Hewitt

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The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by PFHLai (talk) 22:15, 21 May 2016 (UTC)

Mattie Edwards Hewitt

[edit]
Mattie Edwards Hewitt
Mattie Edwards Hewitt
  • ... that Mattie Edwards Hewitt's (pictured) photographic career was a "transition from an amateur in the 19th century to 20th century professional", when there was substantial innovation in photographic equipment?

Created by Nvvchar (talk). Self-nominated at 11:33, 14 May 2016 (UTC).

  • New and long enough, mostly neutral, inline cites, no copyvios or close paraphrasing detected. My only concern with neutrality is the second to last sentence. Could you attribute that quote to a specific person/work rather than writing it in Wikipedia's voice?
The first hook is too long, and I don't know that it really makes sense. Wouldn't every photographer's career in this period be such a transition? I don't see how it's distinct to this photographer. The second hook is fairly boring. Boring hooks often get through because there's no better alternative, but I was surprised to see you had left some incredibly interesting stuff on the table here. The love letters with Johnston are fascinating, especially given historical disagreement over whether they represent a suppressed subculture. Alternatively, including a lyrical quote such as "drops of light reflecting from shiny-leaved willows" in the hook would serve to make it more "hook-y". What are your thoughts on both potential types of alternative hook? ~ RobTalk 16:40, 18 May 2016 (UTC)
  • Thanks BU Rob13 for the review. I have now given attribution to the quote and reworded the last two sentences. I suggest the following Alt2 hook ... that Mattie Edwards Hewitt's photographs documenting the estate for the Paris Exhibition of 1930 were described as shining like "drops of light reflecting from shiny-leaved willows"?Nvvchar. 12:09, 19 May 2016 (UTC)
  • ALT2 good to go! ~ RobTalk 12:20, 19 May 2016 (UTC)
  • No, what the source actually says is "Her images glimmer with drops of light reflecting from shiny-leaved willows", - a description of the images rather than a complement to her photography. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 08:08, 21 May 2016 (UTC)
  • @Cwmhiraeth: I took the hook on good faith because I didn't have access to the offline source, but in any event, I think that quote verifies the hook. The hook doesn't address her skills as a photographer; it just says her photographs have been described that way. Is that not accurate? ~ RobTalk 09:06, 21 May 2016 (UTC)
  • Nevermind, I understand what you're saying. I'd recommend just copy-editing ALT2 to say were described as "glimmering with drops of light reflecting from shiny-leaved willows". I'll update the article accordingly now. ~ RobTalk 09:09, 21 May 2016 (UTC)
  • Good to go. ~ RobTalk 10:19, 21 May 2016 (UTC)