User:Buchanan-Hermit/quotes

March 24, 2007

"Dawn, listen to me. Listen. I love you. I will always love you. This is the work I have to do. Tell Giles-- tell Giles I've figured it out and that I'm okay. Give my love to my friends. You'll have to take care of them now; you'll have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me." —Buffy Summers from the season 5 finale of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

March 8, 2007

"Dad, I'm so sorry I broke all your ribs and busted your spleen and punctured your lung. I-I don't know if you can hear me right now, but...I hope you know...I love you, Dad." —Peter Griffin from Family Guy.

February 2, 2007

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." —Ronald Reagan, from a sound check from the 1984 US election.

December 27, 2006

"Well, if I eat it, and if it makes me grow larger, I can reach the key; and if makes me grow smaller, I can creep under the door: so either way I'll get into the garden, and I don't care which happens!" —Alice from Alice in Wonderland.

December 1, 2006

"If fun were people, I would be China." —Emma Nelson from Degrassi: The Next Generation

October 30, 2006

"Hannah Montana is a goddess! I worship at her feet! For your information, someday I am going to be Mr. Hannah Montana. I am going to watch her every second of every day -- protect her from any obsessed fans. And every night, I'm going to shampoo and condition that BEAUTIFUL blonde hair." —Oliver Oken from Hannah Montana

October 5, 2006

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." —Marianne Williamson from A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course In Miracles

September 6, 2006

"The day I dropped out of college, I remember lying on my bed. My mother came into my room, and she'd been crying. She stared at me for a long time and then she said, 'You only have one shot at life, Georgia. This is no dress rehearsal.' And I said, 'You know what, Mom? Maybe I don't even want to be in the play.' A month later I was killed. I wonder sometimes if someone was listening." —George Lass from Dead Like Me.

August 20, 2006

"Meet John Ashcroft. In 2000, he was running for re-election as Senator from Missouri against a man who died the month before the election. The voters preferred the dead guy, so George W. Bush made him his Attorney General. He was sworn in on a stack of Bibles, 'cause when you can't beat a dead guy, you need all the help you can get." —Michael Moore, from Fahrenheit 9/11.

August 13, 2006

"My English teacher has no face. She has uncombed stringy hair that droops on her shoulders. The hair is black from her part to her ears and then neon orange to the frizzy ends. I can't decide if she had pissed off her hairdresser or is morphing into a monarch butterfly. I call her Hairwoman." —Melinda Sordino, from Speak.

July 13, 2006

"You probably don't think that I can force this towel down your throat. But trust me, I can. All the way. Except I'd hold onto this one little bit at the end. When your stomach starts to digest it, I pull it out. Taking your stomach lining with it. For most people it would take about a week to die. It's very painful." —Jack Bauer, from 24.

June 23, 2006

"As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular." —Oscar Wilde, from The Critic as Artist.

June 14, 2006

"To read makes our speaking English good." —Xander, from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

June 11, 2006

"It won't last; brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Englishmen and Scots. Or Welshmen and Scots. Or Japanese and Scots. Or Scots and other Scots. Damn Scots, they ruined Scotland!" —Groundskeeper Willie, from The Simpsons.

June 7, 2006

"Regard your soldiers as your children, and they will follow you into the deepest valleys. Look on them as your own beloved sons and they will stand by you even unto death." —From The Art of War by Sun Tzu.

June 4, 2006

"Welcome to Duloc, such a perfect town / Here we have some rules, let us lay them down / Don't make waves, stay in line / And we'll get along fine / Duloc is a perfect place / Please do not walk on the grass / Shine your shoes, wipe your... face. / Duloc is, Duloc is, Duloc is a perfect... place!" —From Shrek.

June 1, 2006

"This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom of the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels." —Roger Ebert, in his review of Freddy Got Fingered.

May 28, 2006

"At your age, you're going to have a lot of urges. You're going to want to take off your clothes, and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you WILL get Chlamydia... and die." —Coach Carr, from Mean Girls.

May 27, 2006

"My mother always talked to me a lot about the sky. She liked to watch the clouds in the day, and the stars at night... especially the stars. We would play a game sometimes, a game called, what's beyond the sky. We would imagine darkness, or a blinding light, or something else that we didn't know how to name. But of course, that was just a game. There's nothing beyond the sky. The sky just is, and it goes on and on, and we'll play all of our games beneath it." —Allie Keys, from Taken.

May 26, 2006

"I would not fear a pack of lions led by a sheep, but I would always fear a flock of sheep led by a lion." —Alexander the Great.

May 22, 2006

"Oh, my dear boy, we're not going to punish you for a little thing like that! It was an accident! We don't send people to Azkaban just for blowing up their aunts!" —Cornelius Fudge, from J. K. Rowling's Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.

May 18, 2006

"The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which." —From George Orwell's Animal Farm.

May 17, 2006

"Is this a dagger which I see before me, / The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee; / I have thee not, and yet I see thee still. / Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible / To feeling as to sight? or art thou but / A dagger of the mind, a false creation, / Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain? / I see thee yet, in form as palpable / As this which now I draw." —Macbeth in William Shakespeare's Macbeth.

May 15, 2006

"I'd question your integrity, but you're a journalist." —Lex Luthor in Smallville.

May 14, 2006

"I can not do everything, but I can do something. I must not fail to do the something that I can do." —Helen Keller

May 13, 1006

"I was just a boy when the infidels came to my village in their Black Hawk helicopters. The infidels fired at the oil fields and they lit up like the eyes of Allah. Burning oil rained down from the sky and cooked everything it touched. I could only hide myself and cry as my goats were consumed by the firey black liquid death. In the midst of the chaos, I could swear that I heard my goats... screaming for help. As quickly as they'd come, the infidels were gone. It was on that day... I put a jihad on them.... And if you don't believe it, then you better kill me now... cause I'll put a jihad on you too." —Gary, from Team America: World Police.

May 11, 2006

"I'm afraid of time. I mean, I'm afraid of not having enough time. Not enough time to understand people, how they really are, or to be understood myself. I'm afraid of the quick judgments and mistaks everybody makes. You can't fix them without time. I'm afraid of seeing snapshots instead of movies." —Bailey, from The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

May 10, 2006

"Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes." —Frieda Norris

May 9, 2006

"You will make all kinds of mistakes: but as long as you are generous and true and also fierce you cannot hurt the world or even seriously distress her." —Winston Churchill

May 8, 2006

"Of the thirty-six ways of avoiding disaster, running away is best." —Anonymous