User:Kecander/sandbox

The Patriotic War Against Rats

The Patriotic War Against Rats
Part of War on Rats
Location Combat Outposts Kitchen and Heater Result Decisive Commonwealth Victory
Belligerents
Commonwealth of Freedoms and Stuff	Jabhat al-Nusrats
Commanders and leaders
Supreme Commander Kevin "Muh Freedoms" Anderson Field Marshal Kat Trap	Abu Bakr al-Ratdadi †
Strength
Entire population of the Commonwealth of Freedoms and Stuff	7+ Rats
Casualties and losses
1 box of Tim Tams	6 rats trap'd, 1 rat stomp'd, 1 POW (escaped, potentially among dead)
Most activity has happened in Combat Outpost Heater.

The Patriotic War Against Rats is a war that lasted from May 27, 2016 to May 31, 2016 between Jabhat al-Nusrat ("Nusrats") and the Commonwealth of Freedoms and Stuff ("Commonwealth"). The conflict began with a direct attack by Nusrats against the Tim Tams owned by the Commonwealth. The invading rat was caught in a plastic bag within the Tim Tams and was immediately stomped to death. Nusrats launched daily raids with most of the fighting occurring at the Battle of Combat Outpost Heater. Deficiencies in the defenses of the Commonwealth allowed the Nusrats to consistently infiltrate the apartment. Despite the filling of holes in the heater, Nusrats were constantly launching kamikaze attacks. The war turned into a war of attrition and the Nusrats were eventually wiped out.

Background

Various groups of rats have laid siege to Ashby Ave. The Commonwealth had fought a rat that was hella big and ended with him getting stomped in the kitchen. Real crazy shit dawg. It was like a year ago and there hasn't been any noticable entry since then. The Commonwealth closed off the holes used by the other rats and that ended the first War on Rats. There was relative calm for a long stretch. Jabhat al-Nusra leader Abu Bakr al-Ratdadi arrived at the borders of the Commonwealth and demanded some delicious chocolates, leading to the Battle for Monkey Crate.

Battle for Monkey Crate

After returning home from work on Friday May 27th, Kevin "Muh Freedoms" Anderson noticed a small creature was in the apartment. The small creature was a rat from Jabhat al-Nusrat and was intent on eating dank shit from Australia. The little bastard went directly for the Tim Tams in the Monkey Crate and got stuck in the plastic bag containing the Tim Tams. Muh Freedoms threw the Monkey Crate onto the ground outside. The bag containing the Tim Tams was recovered while the nusrat was still in it. Muh Freedoms then stomped out the invading rat and became the Supreme Commander of the Commonwealth of Freedoms and Stuff. As a result of the battle, a draft was started and all males from the Commonwealth were sent to the front lines immediately. On May 31st, all Commonwealth females joined the fight because like equality n shit I think.

Siege of Combat Outpost Kitchen

Jabhat al-Nusrats sent a search and rescue operation in the evening of Saturday May 28th to no avail. In the following Morning, a rat was cornered in the oven corner of Combat Outpost Kitchen. Muh Freedoms confirmed the cornering by barricading the only entrance/exit. The rat was able to successfully escape the siege but the search parties sent for the rat started the Battle of Combat Outpost Heater. The siege of the kitchen lasted until Tuesday May 31st with no casualties in the kitchen.

Battle of Combat Outpost Heater

When the Siege of Combat Outpost Kitchen began, the decision was made to use expanding foam to fill up all holes used by rats. The rats tried to break through to relieve the siege by assaulting Combat Outpost Heater. On the evening of Sunday May 29th, the first rat hit the trap. Originally assumed to be the rat at combat outpost kitchen, this nusrat turned out not to be the one. The morning of Monday May 30th, one of the scout rats set off a trap and was instantly killed. He was disposed of and another indoor trap was laid. An assault team was dispatched by Jabhat al-Nusrats and clashed with the Commonwealth. The next rat was hit by a trap at the same location. The traps used at Combat Outpost Kitchen were transported to the heater and used against any further invaders due to a shortage of traps. And then another rat got whomped at, goddamn son. The assault on Monday May 31st began an ended in the morning. Field Marshal Kat trap entered the battle while Muh Freedoms stacked fat papers. Two rats were killed less than an hour an a half apart, stretching supply lines very thin for the Commonwealth. There was only one trap remaining at one point.

Results

Freedom no longer being free.