User talk:Caroline Liberty/sandbox

Anna's Peer Review

When I clicked on the "Friends of New London" link, nothing comes up.(in the intro section) The lead looks very long when I first looked at it but it is generally good information. I went back to review the article, but the lead was not there anymore, if I remember it was good but after reading the entire article, I would add more about well known figures and their relation the New London. In the colonial history section, William Callaway was also involved with my article, Liberty Hall. It is great to see how buildings and people are connected through history. In the John Hook Case paragraph, I would rephrase the first half of the sentence so the reader knows what courthouse. Was there any more information on Thomas Jefferson or any dates/time range that he spent in the area? The '19th Century' section is well organized and has a lot of great specific information. (minor edits) 'Education History' minor edits. This section was done very well I think and the overall article did a great job with giving names of specific people and the dates to certain events. This is not a finished article, but just as a reminder while you edit, I would keep in mind to rephrase sentences to make the article flow better as a whole. 'Mead's Tavern' will the first paragraph be edited, deleted or kept? There is repeated information thats specific in 'Bedford Alum Springs Hotel' as in '19th Century' would you keep it or do a more general summery of the hotel in the '19th century' section. All of your points are very neutral and the information is in a clear structure that is easy to understand and follow. Do you have more than two sources? Or will they be added as you edit? They are both reliable sources but it may appeal to readers and my be seen as more accurate if there were more sources since there is a lot of information for New London. Annaanelson3 (talk) 22:42, 19 February 2019 (UTC)

Caroline's response to peer review and feedback

I took the peer review and feedback into great consideration and did my best to fix, edit, and adjust accordingly to what was written. I changed information about the restoration and excavations going on at Mead's Tavern and the Bedford Alum Springs Hotel. I also added more sources in and fix information that was being repeated in different places of the article. I added information about the investigation into finding the location of the arsenal and fixed the Military History header. I cleaned up the article and supplied new, relevant information and fixed grammar and citation errors. I also added three embedded links and two pictures. Future edits to the page could include updates to what Liberty has done with Mead's Tavern and the hotel as well as adding more pictures and information for the sections with less information, such as the W.W. Driskill store. Caroline Liberty (talk) 03:35, 4 March 2019 (UTC)

Instructor feedback on article draft

You have some great material here and lots of good writing. This is a lot to cover and you’ve done a great job with the whole thing. I’ve added lots of comments here. That’s not a bad thing, but rather gives you some things to think about. Some are corrections and others are more or less questions or suggestions. I know you’re planning to add them on the live page, but I can’t give you any feedback on references or sources since I can’t see what you’re using or how you are formatting them.

Excellent lead! One writing correction is needed in the third sentence.

The Colonial History paragraph has an editing comment at the end.

Be consistent. Is it the John Hook case or the Johnny Hook trial? This paragraph needs further editing and a little more explanation. What was the outcome? Why is this important enough to include?

Jefferson only inherited Poplar Forest in 1773 so it is unlikely he spent time in New London during the Colonial era. If you do not have anything substantial to connect him to New London, you will want to omit this. You might add something in the lead that identifies Bedford County as the site of Jefferson’s retreat home.

19th century – I recommend against linking the word “petition.” It’s not a specialized term. Check to see if you can include the Lorenzo Dow’s revival as an event in the 19th century...check the exact date. I believe Dr. Schultz mentioned it in his recorded lecture and it's probably on the New London Chronology page (which you should definitely link to somewhere).

Consider moving the 19th-century info about the hotel to the hotel section and just mention it briefly here. You can link to the later section to direct readers there.

There is a typed url in the 4th paragraph of this section.

Consider sharing the New London Academy information with your classmates and then just link to their page. Of course, you’ll mention it, but you should say when it was founded.

In the arsenal section, you can say that local historians expect to find evidence of the arsenal’s original location on the site of the Bedford Alum Springs Hotel.

Mead’s Tavern. I would suggest omitting the details about ongoing investigations. Instead, just say that archeological and architectural studies are still in progress.

Hotel Note Callaway’s role (decide whether to use Callaway or Calloway) in founding New London. For the arsenal location, we have evidence that points to the hotel property as the location, but expect to confirm that through additional research and archeological study.

Give some dates for the property exchanges in the second paragraph. Check the date for the current building. I was pretty sure it’s 1913.

Omit the last two sentences and just say that there are plans for architectural and archeological research.

Holt Ashwell Holt owned the property. Give an idea of dates. “enslaved wife and two sons” The house wasn’t empty (right, Ashley? :-) ), but it was unoccupied.

i can't wait to see the final product. I know it's going to be good!!dddonald (talk) 00:17, 1 March 2019 (UTC)