User talk:Emsandell/sandbox

Review

Emsandell, good start. You need to fill in some of the details and edit for clarity and concision; you can then proceed to moving the draft into the mainspace. Other things to do once you do that include: categories and image art. -Reagle (talk) 17:07, 15 October 2019 (UTC)

Classmate Feedback

Hi Elena! I made a couple of changes and notes about your article, but it looks good to me!

- I made small grammatical changes

- I added a link to Time Magazine

- I’ve noticed that the headings on Wikipedia have been in sentence case rather than typical title-case so I altered that

- The information box looks really nice!

- Do you have a source to put at the end of the paragraph that reads, “Jessie J overused her vibrato, powerhouse vocals and range which distracted from the song and its content”? (I also changed a bit there for clarity, those two sentences read a little funny to me)

- You have a missing link in your references make sure you take care of that -MichelleBir. (talk) 22:20, 3 November 2019 (UTC)

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Hi Elena, Upon reviewing your article, I listed some broader questions worth considering and suggestions for improvement; I've also made minor grammatical changes throughout.

- under Chart Performance, can you clarify when you're discussing Bang Bang, Burnin' Up and Ain't Been Done? I'm confused by the sentence structure and don't want to edit without knowing which song you are referring to

- did the song chart anywhere else? This section seems fairly brief -- perhaps consider making the section title more vague and adding more information to it?

- would it be helpful to include more information about when Jessie J performed the song live? (ex: on TV shows, at concerts, etc.). You mention one concert briefly, but I was thinking she might have performed it at large venues at least in Australia, given the success of the song

- in order to enhance the article as a stand-alone piece from the album as a whole, perhaps consider adding a section on the song's intended meaning/lyrics?

Great job! JessWeiss (talk) 05:04, 5 November 2019 (UTC)