User talk:GV1330
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I work with the Wiki Education Foundation, and help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment. If there's anything I can do to help with your assignment (or, for that matter, any other aspect of Wikipedia) please feel free to drop me a note. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:20, 4 February 2015 (UTC)
Group Project
[edit]Hey Gannon, just checking in for our group project. -Connor — Preceding unsigned comment added by Ctpen15 (talk • contribs) 04:37, 16 February 2015 (UTC)
Dimethyl Tetrachloroterephthalate Article Review
[edit](I hope I'm posting this review in the right place, if not, sorry!)
Overall, I thought this article was very well done; it’s very informative and it covers the full range of possible information about the topic in a way that’s very easy to follow. I have just a few suggestions that I think would improve it a bit.
Firstly, one small thing I think I might change is one sentence in the Environmental Degradation Section which seems to be worded a little bit awkwardly. The sentence is the following: “When DCPA degrades, it produces the two products of monomethyl tetrachloroterephthalate and tetrachloroterephthalate.” As the sentence is written, it’s a little bit redundant, it would likely flow better if it said “When DCPA degrades, it produces monomethyl tetrachloroterephthalate and tetrachloroterephthalate.”
I also think the article might flow a little better if the sections were ordered slightly differently. Since the section “Environmental Degradation” ends by listing the products of the degradation it seems as though the section “Degradates of Dacthal” would fit nicely directly after that section, since those two sections are related.
I think the article would also benefit from more links to other Wikipedia pages within the text, especially for terms that some people might not be familiar with. In particular, within each sections, I think the following terms would be particularly helpful to add a link to.
Environmental Degradation
- Half-life
Contamination
- Hydroxyl radical
- Volatilization (The title of the Wikipedia article is Volatilisation)
- Photodegradation
Toxicology
- LD 50 (Median Lethal Dose)
Degradates of Dacthal
- Hydrolysis
Dacthal as a Disruptor
- Microtubule
Regulation and the Future of Dacthal
- Safe Drinking Water Act
- United States Environmental Protection Agency
Other than that, I think the article is put together very well. I hope this is helpful!
AELie515 (talk) 13:54, 5 April 2015 (UTC)
Peer Review (already been posted on the talk page for the article)
[edit]Overall this article is well written and informative. There are a few things that can be added or moved around to help the article flow a little bit better. First off, I would recommend using either DCPA or Dacthal throughout the whole article after the abbreviated names have been introduced. This is probably not absolutely necessary, and you did seem to stick with DCPA for the majority of the article, but keeping with just one of those terms might help avoid confusion. The lead section does a good job introducing the chemical and what it is used for. If I were to make any changes to the lead section I would consider adding a sentence saying something about the major health effects seen in animals (decreased motor activity/poor reflexes), as this is a large chunk of the article. Also, I think there could be a few more wikilinks throughout the article. Some suggestions for links in the Biodegradation section would be words like bioconcentration, degradation, and groundwater. In the toxicology section I would recommend links on words like lungs, liver, kidney, thyroid gland, metabolites, microtubule, cell division, cell wall, chromosome, multinucleate, adrenal gland, mitotic. Not all of these are necessary but I think adding links to some of the more complicated terms like microtubule and multinucleate might help readers who are not as up to speed on biological terminology. In terms of the order of the article, I like how you have the headings split. In the toxicology section it’s good to have different subheadings for humans and animals. However, there is once sentence under the Animal Studies subheading that starts with “In humans…” and discusses how it is absorbed by humans. While this relates to what is being discussed about animal studies, you might want to consider putting that under the Humans subheading. Also in the toxicology section there is a paragraph about how DCPA kills plants. This paragraph is sandwiched between two paragraphs that discuss health effects on animals. It contains important information about how the chemical works so I would recommend either adding another subheading under Toxicology for Plants or adding another section titled something along the lines of “How It Works.” Under the Regulation section, if possible, add a list of the states that do have standards set for DCPA. And if there is any information about regulation in other countries add something about that. This is a good article that contains important information about this chemical. The major thing I would say is adding more wikilinks but overall it is very well done. I hope my comments help! Aukere (talk) 14:53, 23 April 2015 (UTC)