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User talk:Sbugden

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Welcome!

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Hello, Sbugden, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with the Wiki Education Foundation; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please check out the student training library, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing.

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  • You can find answers to many student questions on our Q&A site, ask.wikiedu.org

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 21:08, 14 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hey Sarah! Yellow Martin (talk) 13:11, 18 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Hey!! --Sbugden (talk) 15:48, 23 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review

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After reading your draft it is very evident that you know your topic well, and have done a lot of research. There are a few points I'd like to comment on:

1. Introduction: I would suggest avoiding a whole lot of information on predator mimicry, as this is covered already on Wikipedia (see Batesian mimicry). While it may be beneficial to include it in your article for comparison purposes, try to stay away from it throughout your introduction. Additionally, the definition you provided could be a little more clear.

2. Sources: After reviewing a few of your sources you appear to have a great start on finding articles related to your topic. I like that you outlined important research and information from each article using citations. It is very clear that you know you've read and understand your articles.

3. Format: Try using headings & subheadings to give readers an overall idea of what your final draft will look like. This would definitely be helpful when you are creating your article as well.

4. Additional suggestions: I would suggest providing more information about why this is seen in animals and what the purpose of this behaviour is. How do animals benefit from locomotor mimicry? Are there differences regarding intent of mimicry seen across species?

Overall, this seems like a very interesting and well researched topic and I am excited to read your final product! Sydneymanuel (talk) 19:51, 22 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you! Sbugden (talk) 19:27, 30 October 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Feedback

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Nice work on your draft. A few things you could improve

  • Wikipedia articles don't have introductions, they have lead sections, which are supposed to summarize all the major points of the article, and should not contain information that isn't present in the body of the article. For example, you mention salticid-mimicking moths in your intro, but they aren't mentioned elsewhere in the article.
    Check out pages 7-9 of the Editing Wikipedia brochure for more information on article layout.
  • Section headers use sentence capitalization, not title capitalization; only the first word of the title, and proper nouns, should be capitalized.
  • You might want to add a few more links to other articles. Consider linking terms that the average reader might not be very familiar with.

Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:18, 14 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]