User talk:Sklupp1
Mendenhall Glacier
[edit]Hi Stephie, I saw that you are working to improve and expand the Wikipedia article on Mendenhall Glacier. That is a subject near and dear to my heart, as I spent two wonderful summers working there as a ranger/interpreter with the U.S. Forest Service, which manages the Tongass National Forest (including the glacier). I think it's awesome that you are taking on this challenge and I'd be happy to help out in any way that I can. NorthBySouthBaranof (talk) 03:34, 23 October 2013 (UTC)
Review by Sbonni1
[edit]This article is well written with appropriately placed evidence backing up the statements. There are minor spelling and grammar errors in a few paragraphs. The order of the paragraphs is logical and flows together well. The material is easy to read and understand and does not sound elementary. The material is also factual and unbiased. I would suggest going over the article to see how you could sentences that may be confusing or run-ons. Overall the article was very well written and fits in well into the overall Wikipedia page. Human Effects Grammar errors in first two sentences. Throughout the paragraph you need to switch "affect" with "effect". Be careful for run on sentences also.
Climate Change This is paragraph is concise and accurately explains how climate change increases the rate of retreat. There is a good link between the first paragraph regarding the human influence and how that leads to climate change.
Negative Effects of Retreat Avoid writing in the third person, specifically the first sentence. You may want to remove the first sentence because it is a question. Avoid using can in some sentences. For example you wrote "This can be a negative effect for the Alaskan economy as these areas can be a source of revenue." Make it a definite statement and change "can" to "is" instead. A few sentences later also have the same problem.
Benefits of Retreat The sentence following your 9th reference needs to be reworded. This paragraph is great! It is very interesting and has very few errors. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sbonni (talk • contribs) 21:03, 24 October 2013 (UTC)