User talk:Tmihalop

Please leave me comments with your signature , Thank you Tmihalop (talk) 04:23, 20 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Comments and Suggestions for Improvement:

Good job on your edits for the article "Adolescent Cliques". It is very appropriate that you added ten typical types of cliques to the subheading "Cliques in Highschool". Perhaps you can add a citation for each of the types of cliques that you included so that readers will know where you got each of your definitions from. I'm not sure that the subheading needed to be changed from "Highschool Cliques" to "Cliques in Highschool". The former name seemed to be fine because it was shorter and simpler.

In reviewing your edits, I thought it was useful that you added links to other wikipedia pages, such as Buddy Holly, and brand names.

When reading the section on "nerds", I'm not sure if the phrase "just isn't cool" is appropriate for an online source of information.

Good job summarizing the study on associations between clique membership status and internalizing and externalizing problems during late childhood. It is a good length for a summary and is clear to understand. My only suggestion is to omit the number of participants in the study [451 children (236 boys, 215 girls)], because readers will probably not need that kind of information.

The following reference in the section titled, "Cliques in High School" appears to follow APA guidlines. The name "10 Types of Teens: A Field Guide to Teenagers" may have to be italicized. Kelly, J. (2012, March 8). TLC Family "10 Types of Teens: A Field Guide to Teenagers". TLC "Guides". Retrieved October 31, 2012, from http://tlc.howstuffworks.com/family/10-types-of-teens.htm

Overall, great job with adding to the section on high school cliques, and with the new section, "Effects of cliques on the development of psychopathology in children". You will need to add a third edit to improve upon the article, because when you said on the article talk page that you would 1) describe some of the types of cliques and 2) create a new "cliques in schools" heading, these 2 improvements are basically the same thing, because the types of cliques are included in the "cliques in schools" heading. Perhaps you could correct grammer and spelling throughout the article as well?

Peer Review Marking Criteria:

1/1 The student has improved the quality of the information available in this article

0.5/1 The student has improved the clarity and/or organization of the content

1/1 The student has clearly explained the method and findings of an empirical paper

1/1 The student has correctly cited the empirical paper according to Wikipedia guidelines, and the paper is appropriate (i.e., it is an empirical study on development published the results in an academic journal) Rach23 (talk) 00:46, 8 November 2012 (UTC)[reply]