Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Billy Bates (baseball)/archive3

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ian Rose via FACBot (talk) 30 November 2021 [1].

Billy Bates (baseball)[edit]

Nominator(s): Therapyisgood (talk) 02:33, 25 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

This article is about... Billy Bates. Pinging @Hog Farm:, as they did a great pre-FAC review. I've expanded this over the past few days, and hopefully this meets FA criteria. Expanded with new sourcing and information after a Newspapers.com search and roundup. Therapyisgood (talk) 02:33, 25 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I'll wait to post a review to let some other editors look at this first, but I feel like my comments in the pre-FAC review and in the last FAC have been well-addressed. Hog Farm Talk 02:43, 25 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments - support[edit]

  • "William Derrick Bates was born on December 7, 1963, in Houston, Texas, to a paint foreman" - to my mind, being born "to" someone suggests that person was the mother. Presumably his mother wasn't a paint foreman?
    • The source doesn't say which parent was a paint foreman, so I've reworded in the article to just say "the son of a paint foreman". Therapyisgood (talk) 20:32, 26 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He finished the season batting .296" - what does this mean?
  • "and drew a walk" - what does this mean?
  • "As of 2018, Bates holds" - that was three years ago, so if a more up to date stat is not available, I would suggest changing it to "held"
  • "Bates; and LaVel Freeman" - think that semi-colon should be a comma or possibly not even there at all
  • "stated Bates may make" => "stated that Bates might make"
  • "in a Zephyrs' victory" - no need for that apostrophe
  • Image caption is a complete sentence so needs a full stop
  • "though Bates stated he played at shortstop and third base last year" => "though Bates stated that he had played at shortstop and third base the previous year"
  • "was placed on the DL" - what is the DL?
  • "an error that allowed Boggs to reach" - reach what?
  • "and the Brewers won, 8–4" - don't think that comma is needed
  • "Bates came into the game as a pinch runner" - first mention in the body so should be linked
  • "with the Reds losing, 4–3" - don't think that comma is needed
  • "moved on to the World Series" - link World Series (probably the specific one)
  • "was not able take his spot" - word "to" is missing
  • "He was a physical education major at the University of Texas" - in 1984?
  • Think that's it from me..... -- ChrisTheDude (talk) 19:14, 26 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support - nice one -- ChrisTheDude (talk) 21:02, 26 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Support from GhostRiver[edit]

I will look at this when it is not 1:30 in the morning. — GhostRiver 05:29, 30 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

  • Stats don't need to be cited in the lead if they're mentioned with a citation in the body
  • MLB year template should be used in the infobox
  • "Though defensively he played as a second baseman," >> "Though his defensive position was at second base,"
  • "4th round" >> "fourth round" per MOS:ORDINAL and MOS:NUMERAL
  • "and teams that he played for won multiple minor league titles." >> "helping several of his minor league teams win their respective league titles."
  • Name the second baseman who was injured in the lede
  • Delink "pinch hit" in the lede, it's linked above
    • Pinch runner is linked above, not pinch hitter, I believe. Therapyisgood (talk) 22:21, 30 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • No comma after "scored the winning run in Game 2"
  • "Minor League Baseball" should be capitalized as the name of a business, whereas "the minor leagues" would not be
  • He presumably played for the Reds and Cubs organizations, as those are major league teams
  • "After retirement" >> "After his retirement" or "After retiring"
  • Link "scout" to Scout (sports)
  • "8th round" >> "eighth round" per above
  • If he enrolled in 1983, he wouldn't have played until 1984, as baseball is a spring sport at UT-Austin and he would have enrolled in the fall
  • To determine which team would represent the Central Regional in the College World Series (CWS), the Longhorns played against the Mississippi State Bulldogs; the Longhorns defeated the Bulldogs and advanced to the World Series. Redundant sentence
  • "the Longhorns never lost" >> "the Longhorns remained undefeated"
  • "and, in the 1984 College World Series, lost in the finale to the Cal State Fullerton Titans 3–1." >> "and lost 3–1 to the Cal State Fullerton Titans in the final game of the 1984 CWS."
  • Link "Division I" to NCAA Division I
  • The quote with "if you just put the stats on" should have the period inside of it, per MOS:LQ
  • Link 1985 MLB Draft in the body
  • Switch the order of clauses so it's "Although they had 7 pitchers, there were only two position players"
  • Excise the parentheticals, as you have the WL for "position players" and it can be inferred that means "non-pitchers"
  • Instead of parentheses around "Bates and LaVel Freeman", add a colon after "position players"
  • "The eight home runs that Bates hit and his 75 runs batted in (RBI)" >> "Bates' eight home runs and 75 runs batted in (RBI)"
  • Delink "home run" in the "Rise to the majors" section
  • "for most steals in a single postseason game, with three." >> "with three stolen bases in a single postseason game."
  • I don't know why the "MLB debut" section is not called "Milwaukee Brewers"
  • ""[was] expected to join [the MLB team] by game time [August 16]"" goes beyond MOS:PMC and can be paraphrased
  • Link "start" in "first career start" to Games started
  • "and final" doesn't need to be in parentheses
  • Link "hit by a pitch" to Hit by pitch
  • the Sounds defeated the Buffalo Bisons when Chris Jones hit a double that scored Bates as the game ended after 18 innings. Too much going on in this clause
    • Reworked. 22:58, 30 October 2021 (UTC)
  • Add (NL) after "National League" in "National League West"; that way, you can say "1990 NL Championship Series"
  • "In Game 1, manager Lou Piniella put Bates in the game as a pinch runner for Ron Oester on first base in the bottom of the ninth inning with the Reds losing 4–3." >> "In Game 1, with the Reds down 4–3 in the bottom of the ninth inning, manager Lou Piniella put Bates in the game as a pinch runner for Ron Oester on first base."
  • Comma after "When the strike ended"
  • Career stats should be in the "Later career" section, after his reitrement is mentioned
  • Link "baseball at the Olympic games" to Baseball at the 1984 Summer Olympics
  • The part about being taunted for his height would make more sense if it were connected in the text to the fact that he was only 5'7"

That's what I have. — GhostRiver 17:54, 30 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Support by Lee Vilenski[edit]

I'll begin a review of this article very soon! My reviews tend to focus on prose and MOS issues, especially on the lede, but I will also comment on anything that could be improved. I'll post up some comments below over the next couple days, which you should either respond to, or ask me questions on issues you are unsure of. I'll be claiming points towards the wikicup once this review is over.

Lede
  • Surely he is a retired professional baseball player who played in the MLB, rather than just a former MLB player? Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 22:11, 31 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • I feel the lede needs to cover a bit more about how he lost his place in the Reds after he won the playoff game. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 22:11, 31 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
    • Tried to rework to emphasize he was signed to a one-year contract with the Reds. Therapyisgood (talk) 21:37, 1 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Prose
Additional comments

Additionally, if you liked this review, or are looking for items to review, I have some at my nominations list. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:58, 31 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@Lee Vilenski: and @GhostRiver: comments responded to. Therapyisgood (talk) 22:41, 1 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Source review[edit]

  • I gave this a pretty thorough comprehensiveness check as a pre-FAC review, and I think it's pretty good on source comprehensiveness front unless I missed something
  • "LaVel Freeman". ESPN.com. ESPN. Retrieved August 2, 2013." - no need to have ESPN.com and ESPN, just ESPN should be enough
  • You use MILB.com and milb.com, recommend consistency
  • Did some spot checks as I went along, things were fine

This is a pass for all effective purposes, but I would like to see the two minor formatting things fixed. Hog Farm Talk 17:44, 27 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hog Farm you posted above that you may be intending to do a full review, are you still planning that? (t · c) buidhe 00:12, 29 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Buidhe: - I don't believe I'll have time to do a full review for this one. Hog Farm Talk 00:18, 29 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Image review - pass[edit]

The sole image is appropriately licenced, positioned, captioned and alt texted. Gog the Mild (talk) 20:30, 28 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@FAC coordinators: Three supports, an image review and a source review. Can I add another? Therapyisgood (talk) 00:11, 29 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Go ahead. (t · c) buidhe 00:11, 29 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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