Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Manchester Mummy

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by SandyGeorgia 23:05, 4 April 2009 [1].

Manchester Mummy[edit]

Nominator(s): Malleus Fatuorum 04:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

A short but I believe nevertheless comprehensive account of the events following the death of Hannah Beswick, a woman whose pathological fear of premature burial led to her mummified body being put on public display in 19th-century Manchester. Please be kind to dear Hannah. Malleus Fatuorum 04:52, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Comments - I've always been intrigued by short articles at FAC, so here are a few quick comments. Feel free to ignore at your discretion.
  • Following her death in 1758 her body was embalmed and kept above ground, to be periodically checked for signs of life. - That comma could easily be removed.
  • The method of embalming was not recorded, but it probably involved replacing the blood with a mixture of turpentine and vermilion. - "Probably" → "likely"?
  • However, Beswick's will, dated 25 July 1757, less than a year before her death, states only that White was to receive £100 (£10,900 as of 2009),[8] and that £400 (£43,600 as of 2009)[8] was to be allocated for funeral expenses. - The commas are abundant in this sentence; perhaps some of them could be substituted with dashes?
  • Is there any more biographical information on Beswick herself?

I look forward to supporting. –Juliancolton | Talk 05:16, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Reply
    • The comma could certainly be removed, but I think it ought to stay, as there are two separate ideas here; that her body was embalmed and kept above ground, and the reason why.
    • I prefer "probably" to "likely", but the meaning is the same in either case.
    • You're right about the blizzard of commas, so I've slightly rejigged that sentence.
    • There appears to be no more biographical information on Beswick, or at least none that I've been able to find. Her fame rests on her mummification and subsequent display.
Thanks for your comments. --Malleus Fatuorum 05:33, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Provisional support, pending a final read-through in the morning. –Juliancolton | Talk 05:45, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Sasata

  • I think it should be mentioned in the lead that she was wealthy
  • Should not a period follow after the honorific Dr, or alternatively be spelled out?
  • "Some years before her own death, one of Beswick's brothers, John,..." Brother to John Beswick senior, or to Hannah? (Unclear because both are discussed in the previous sentence)
  • "Alternatively it has been suggested that White was considerably in debt to Beswick, a debt that would have to be repaid after the funeral, which was avoided by her embalming." How would he repay a debt to a dead person?
  • Is it known what relationship Mary Graeme and Esther Robinson had to Hannah Beswick?
  • "One of the few contemporary accounts is provided by Philip Wentworth..." Accounts of what?
  • "...it was decided that, despite Beswick's fear of being buried alive, she was "irrevocably and unmistakably dead". Despite is used to imply a contradiction between two propositions, but I fail to see the contradiction here.
  • Is the name of the Secretary of State who issued the burial known?
  • Why did the Bishop of Manchester have to give permission for the burial?
  • Why did the Bonnie Prince's arrival make Hannah apprehensive? Did he have a reputation for plundering money from the well-to-do?
  • What year did the weaver find the loot? What was the total $ he received from Oliphant's?
  • What year was Birchin Bower demolished?
  • MOS nitpicking: should ref 4 say pp. instead of p. (pages plural)
  • refs 18 and 21 missing ending period
  • no page # or year for ref 19
  • Bondeson 2001 does not have all-capitals title, unlike the others
  • Reply
    • I've added "wealthy" to Hannah's description in the lead.
    • The MoS allows for either Dr or Dr.[2]
    • Clarified that the John being discussed was Hannah's brother, not her father's brother.
    • He would have been required to repay the debt to the dead person's estate, but that was just listed as one of the various accounts of the events following Beswick's death. There's no evidence that there was any debt to be repaid anyway.
    • The source doesn't elaborate on what relationship Mary Graeme and Esther Robinson had to Hannah Beswick, and very likely neither did the will. The important point is that White wasn't one of the executors.
    • Resin now wikilinked.
    • I've changed "accounts" to "accounts of her" for clarification.
    • I've rewritten the "despite ..." sentence.
    • I would be pretty confident that the Secretary of State referred to is Gathorne Gathorne-Hardy, 1st Earl of Cranbrook, but the source doesn't name him, so neither have I.
    • Again, the sources don't say why the permission of the Bishop of Manchester was needed. I could speculate about consecrated ground and so on, but ... I'd imagine that a surviving next of kin would normally be asked to give permission for a burial, but she'd died 110 years earlier ...
    • I don't suppose that Hannah was apprehensive about Bonnie Prince Charlie himself, but about the invading Scottish army he was leading.
    • The sources don't say what year the weaver found the loot, if indeed he did find it in the way described. That's why I hedged it with "it is claimed". It's at least as likely that he was money-laundering I suppose, and just used Hannah's story as a convenient cover. I'm merely reporting what the sources claim.
    • The date of Birchin Bower's demolition isn't mentioned in any of the sources, but it was certainly before the 1980s, when the Ferranti factory was built.
    • p changed to pp.
    • All refs now end with a period.
    • Year and page number added to ref #19.
    • Title of Bondeson's book capitalised to match the other book titles.
Thanks for your comments. One of the significant difficulties with this article has been in sifting through "the innacuracies and contradictions" of the events following Beswick's death, propagated on all sorts of cooky web sites. Hard facts have been pretty hard to come by, and I really do believe that this article summarises pretty much all that can be verified about those events. --Malleus Fatuorum 14:46, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support I believe you, I tried looking for more info on some historical academic databases I have access to but came up short. Nice article. Sasata (talk) 03:24, 29 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Comments - sources look okay, links checked out with the link checker tool. Ealdgyth - Talk 14:04, 28 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Technical Review
  • The following ref (code pasted below) is duplicated and appears more than once in the ref section, use a WP:REFNAME instead.

Support - I read this fascinating, short article the other day, but I forgot to comment. This could have been merely anecdotal, but it is an engaging, concise, well-written and researched article. Graham Colm Talk 18:39, 31 March 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Image review: corrected some incorrect stuff on the two public domain images, both are okay now. Jappalang (talk) 01:50, 1 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]

  • Thanks for making those modifications Jappalang, very much appreciated. I owe you one. :-) --Malleus Fatuorum 11:48, 1 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support. I read this one when it went live, but didn't realise it was at FAC. Says everything that needs to be said about the subject, and couldn't say it better.Iridescent :  Chat  19:02, 1 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support -this article is fascinating and well written. 195.188.23.230 (talk) 09:47, 3 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Support great article! 123abcdoreme3 (talk) 17:56, 4 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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