Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Part of Me (Katy Perry song)/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by GrahamColm 17:40, 16 June 2012 [1].

Part of Me (Katy Perry song)[edit]

Part of Me (Katy Perry song) (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Nominator(s): teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 23:33, 9 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because I feel that it meets the FA criteria and I personally think that its an interesting article and people will be interested in it considering the fact that Perry's movie will be released soon. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 23:33, 9 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

  • Comment: looks like some copyediting is needed here, some examples of problematic passages:
  • "Perry eventually finds herself reminiscing over her experiences with her ex-boyfriend, yet remains spiteful towards him, burning a love note next to a LAV-25 and venting frustration through the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program, the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program."
Done reworded. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:30, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Bill Lamb from About.com also gave the song 4 out of 5 stars stating; "In the wake"" The semicolon is wrong here.
Done , Removed semicolon teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:31, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Priya Elan of NME, gave a negative review of the song" No need for a comma here.
Done removed comma. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:30, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "On March 16, 2012 Capitol Records released an official trailer" Missing a comma here.
Done added comma. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:30, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "In Ireland, 'Part of Me' peaked at number 5, becoming her 12th single to reach the top 10 on the chart.[34] In Italy, the song was certified Gold by the FIMI with sales of over 25,000. [35] "Part of Me" reached number one " Inconsistency here, single quote vs double quote.
Done fixed quotes/references. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:30, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "So this is the complete special edition of my album for my fans" [6] On February 13, 2012, "Part of Me" received" Some other sentences don't have periods at the end, either.
Done added period and added period to other sentences that I saw needed.
  • "and a remix to be released on March 26, 2012. [5]" There shouldn't be a space like this between periods and citations. Mark Arsten (talk) 19:15, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Done Fixed all citation spacing issues. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 21:30, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Thanks for the comments, I did not see those issues and I fixed them the best I could. :) teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 23:44, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose at this time. Nikkimaria (talk) 15:03, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

  • General copyediting needed throughout - for example, why is "Military" capitalized? Why the duplication in "through the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program, the Marine Corps Martial Arts Program"?
  • Some WP:MOS problems: bracketed and spaced ellipses, song titles should consistently include quotation marks, etc.
  • Multiple inconsistencies in citation formatting - these need to be cleaned up
  • What makes this a high-quality reliable source? This? This? This? This?
  • File:Snapshot_of_Part_of_Me_video.jpg needs a much stronger fair-use rationale. Nikkimaria (talk) 15:03, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Ok, thanks for your feedback however I don't quite agree with your comments on the reliable sources, all of the websites that are used are websites that are commonly used on music-related Wikipedia articles. How can Yahoo! not be a reliable source?? If your look at Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) About.com was used there and all of the other sources are reliable music websites that not just anyone can write for. As for the image I agree, as well as the military being capitalized. I will work on cleaning up the references and working the MOS. Thanks, teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 15:46, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
The Yahoo! page you're using is a blog; though it's hosted by Yahoo!, there's no indication that they exercise editorial control over it. Nikkimaria (talk) 19:24, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Bill Lamb is a massively established writer and has been used in FA's in the past. It is a high quality reliable source.--(CA)Giacobbe (talk) 21:55, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
I have handled most of these requests. What Giacobbe said was Very true, and as with Yahoo! Yes it may say its a blog but its under Yahoo!'s publication which is needless to say a reliable source, therefore it should rule out the fact that it qualifies as a blog. Had it been written by some random guy in his basement, then yes i would understand, but its Yahoo! so I don't understand, Yahoo! hires experienced journalists with degrees. But since its a blog I guess it does go against the policy so it has been removed. As with the references style and bracketed and spaced ellipses can you please provide examples because I have tried to execute these requests but I cannot find what's wrong. teman13 TALKCONTRIBUTIONS 06:31, 13 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Oppose I honestly can't see how this passed GA, let alone be able to pass FA. It is not very well written. The first paragraph of the background section, for example, does not flow what-so-ever, and is basically a bunch of facts all put together that don't connect. "Part of Me" was initially written by Katy Perry, Dr. Luke, Bonnie McKee and Max Martin in 2010, during the same studio sessions for "California Gurls", "Teenage Dream" and "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)". Perry, who had been casual friends with McKee for years, requested her assistance in co-writing "Part of Me". McKee stayed up all night writing the lyrics, and when Perry read the third line she had written, she shouted: "We're buying you a car!". Perry's satisfaction with her writing ability led to further collaborations. --> Not even sure the "We're buying you a car!" should be here, but I put it in anyway. I think the fact that she was satisfied with her writing is good enough to say. And yes, About.com is an unreliable source for FA. Statυs (talk) 18:34, 13 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Oppose. Sorry, but I read some parts of the article and noted that the prose is not good at all. Some examples:
    • Part of Me" received a mixed positive response amongst music critics ---> How mixed positive? Mixed? or Positive? or do you want to say Mixed to positive? — Tomica (talk) 18:45, 13 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
    • The music video for "Part of Me" was directed by Ben Mohr, filming began on February 16, 2012, ---> reads awkward
    • while the music follows the chord progression of Dm–F–A♯-C ---> This is Wikipedia:OR
    • In "Part of Me", the song begins with Perry somberly ---> awkward
    • ...for the Teenage Dream era ---> This reads like a fan made sentence.

These are just some examples, the whole article needs lifting. For now this is far away from an article with a feature status. — Tomica (talk) 18:45, 13 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]


The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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