Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Tropical Storm Carrie (1972)/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was promoted by Ucucha 03:12, 23 August 2011 [1].

Tropical Storm Carrie (1972)[edit]

Tropical Storm Carrie (1972) (edit | talk | history | protect | delete | links | watch | logs | views)

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Nominator(s): Juliancolton (talk) 19:44, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Call me Julian. Some days ago—never mind how long precisely—having little or no activity in my contribution history, and nothing particular to interest me on FAC, I thought I would browse about a little and see the watery part of the project. It is a way I have of driving off the boredom, and regulating the keyboard. Whenever I find myself growing grim about the fingers; whenever it is a blank, empty page on my computer screen; whenever I find myself involuntarily pausing before articles for deletion, and bringing up the rear of every stub-class article I meet; and especially whenever my typos get such an upper hand of me, that it requires a strong moral principle to prevent me from deliberately misspelling words, and methodically opposing people's nominations—then, I account it high time to expand an article as soon as I can. Juliancolton (talk) 19:44, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Nice. Nikkimaria (talk) 19:58, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
I try. :) Juliancolton (talk) 20:05, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Source review - spotchecks not done. Nikkimaria (talk) 19:58, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

  • Why "U.S. Weather Bureau" but "United States Department of Commerce"? Also, author and publisher data given here doesn't seem to match exactly what you've written
  • FN 19: hyphen should be dash. Nikkimaria (talk) 19:58, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    Think I got both of these. Juliancolton (talk) 20:05, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support - Honestly, I didn't see anything wrong with this piece. All could do was add a link and nothing more. Then again, my eyes may not be the best for looking for the minute errors within prose but from my standpoint, this meets the featured article criteria. Also, very inspiring opening statement :) Cyclonebiskit (talk) 22:26, 21 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

SupportComment, leaning to support: Professionally done, but I have a few quibbles:

  • The image captions need to be made a little more informative. I don't think "Storm path" and "Rainfall from Carrie" are adequate descriptions
  • "...a tropical wave that emerged from the western coast of Africa on August 15, 1972, and entered the Atlantic Ocean". Surely, when it "emerged from the western coast of Africa" it had already entered the Atlantic Ocean?
  • Can a wave be properly described as a "weather system" (as in "A relatively strong weather system, the wave progressed westward..."
  • There are a few over-complicated sentences. Here is one: "In response to the pressure gradient between Carrie and the high pressure area to its north producing gusty northeasterly winds, and by extension high seas, the National Weather Service issued small craft warnings starting on September 1 and extending from Massachusetts to the Carolinas".
  • "algae" is a plural noun, thus "The algae releases..." is incorrect.

Brianboulton (talk) 23:31, 26 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Brian, thank you for the review, as always. I've addressed your specific concerns, and while I can't immediately pick out any more instances of overly complicated sentences, I hope my fixes are to your satisfaction. Juliancolton (talk) 01:03, 27 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, I'm happy with what you've done and have switched to support. Brianboulton (talk) 22:44, 28 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Strong support I had some minor quibbles that I relayed to the nominator offsite, but nothing considerably detrimental to the FA status this article very much deserves. Excellent work! ★ Auree talk 22:52, 30 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for the review and support! Juliancolton (talk) 00:23, 31 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Comment. Some concerns with prose:
    • The influence of a nearby upper-level low pressure system caused the disturbance to further deteriorate, — find a link for "upper-level low"
    • The low pressure system maintained a cold core and had not yet established itself at the surface. — jargon; link cold core
    • For the first time, a low-level circulation center had been identified in association with the system,[1] — was identified?
    • reconnaissance aircraft flying into the cyclone reported sustained winds of up to around 55 mph (89 km/h).[1] — link to maximum sustained wind here and remove the link below
    • Post-storm reanalysis estimates the depression had strengthened into a tropical storm at around 0000 UTC on August 31.[2] — why present tense here?
    • At the time, it was located approximately 350 miles (560 km) east of Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. — while not wrong, the antecedent for "it" is located two sentences away. Restate it here.
    • Carrie had already reached its initial peak intensity with maximum sustained winds of 60 mph (97 km/h) and a minimum central pressure of 1,002 millibars (29.6 inHg), — central pressure is jargon; link to atmospheric pressure, pressure system or something similar
    • and strong wind shear inhibited immediate strengthening as it continue to slow to a drift. — unclear antecedent, and subject/verb agreement
    • At its weakest, the storm's highest winds were found far from the center, likely generated more by the increasing pressure gradient in relation to an anticyclone to the north than by Carrie itself.[1] — link to pressure gradient, and rephrase the "Carrie itself" clause to something like "than by Carrie's low pressure center itself" or something similar
    • A low pressure system moving through the Mid-Atlantic states pulled Carrie northwest, back toward the United States East Coast, at an accelerated forward speed.[5] — should East Coast be capitalized? Do you need an apostrophe? Would it be simpler to say "the East Coast" and link it somewhere?
      • I'm using "US East Coast" as a region rather than a geographical feature, so I think it needs to be capitalized. I could reword it to "East Coast of the United States", but then it's just switching stuff around. Juliancolton (talk) 00:23, 31 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    • By later on September 2, the storm had begun to show signs of reorganization, — remove "by"
    • Carrie quickly deepened under the influence of baroclinic processes, — jargon; link to baroclinity, and rapid deepening (or bomb (meteorology)); this sentence is also too long, split it.
      • It didn't RI though (there are criteria for what constitutes RI, so I think by piping it in, we'd be implying the criteria were met). Juliancolton (talk) 00:23, 31 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    • The pressure gradient between Carrie and the high pressure area to its north produced gusty northeasterly winds, — link to anticyclone or high-pressure area
      • I already linked anticyclone above, does it need to be linked again? Juliancolton (talk) 00:23, 31 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
        • Well, my concern here is that most people don't know that a high-pressure area is an anticyclone. So I would link it again. Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 19:27, 1 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    • Are there any suitable articles for small craft / gale warnings?
    • Ongoing, as well as the threat as continued heavy rainfall necessitated the issuance of flash flood watches throughout eastern Massachusetts…" — I can't even parse this sentence. Please rewrite.
    • Sustained winds were recorded at 28 mph (45 km/h), with only slightly higher gusts, although the Chesapeake Light reported unofficial gusts to near 50 mph (80 km/h). — what is an unofficial gust? Just say "unofficially reported"
    • Along the coast, rough surf caused beach erosion and swamped hundreds of small craft.[15] — link to coastal erosion
    • link Narragansett Electric Company
    • Total monetary damage was estimated at $1,780,000, of which $1,200,000 in losses was inflicted on Massachusetts. — was that 1972 USD or is it current-year USD? Same in the next sentence
    • Four fatalities were attributed to the storm, two the aftermath of boating accidents in Massachusetts, and two the result of rough surf along the coast of Maine. — this seems better handled with a colon and verbs on both of the sentence's latter clauses
  • Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 23:20, 30 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for the detailed comments; I've either attempted to fix all your points, or left comments where I don't necessarily agree. Juliancolton (talk) 00:23, 31 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support. I gave it a detailed GA review, of which Juliancolton kindly addressed all of my comments. It is a great article with great writing. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 17:33, 7 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support. All right, enough for me. Support. Titoxd(?!? - cool stuff) 00:15, 8 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Support. seems like an example of WP's best work to me.YE Pacific Hurricane 23:34, 7 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]


The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.
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