Wikipedia:Peer review/A1 (Croatia)/archive1

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A1 (Croatia)[edit]

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to nominate it for GA. Any feedback is welcome and appreciated!

Thanks, Tomobe03 (talk) 15:36, 28 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Brief comment: I think the title needs to give a better indication of what the article is about. Although to UK readers "A1" might suggest a road (I live within a mile of the British A1), I doubt whether all readers will make the connection. Why not "A1 motorway (Croatia)"? Brianboulton (talk) 23:30, 29 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I agree, but this issue has been subject of a debate some time ago and it was apparently decided to change name of the article to "A1 (Croatia)". However there is a redirect from "A1 Motorway (Croatia)" to the article. Thanks for the comment though.

Finetooth comments: Thank you for writing an article about Croatia for the English Wikipedia. This was an interesting article to read. A lot of work has gone into it, and it has the potential to become GA. However, it is not ready for GAN yet and will need more work to get there. Here are some suggestions:

Copyediting

  • I did quite a bit of proofreading and copyediting through the top sections, but the whole article needs a careful line-by-line copyedit.
Agreed - the article has been submitted for WP:GOCE copyediting.
 Done Copyediting done by User:WikiCopter following a request through WP:GOCE

Map

  • It would be really helpful if the map had labels showing the major cities and towns. Also helpful would be a key explaining the meaning of the colors and shading variations.
The key has been added. I'll see what can be done about the labels...

Overlinking

  • There's no need to link things like Hrvatske Autoceste, Dubrovnik more than once in the lead and once on first occurrence in the main text.
 Done Additional links (and then only the third such link in the article) are left only in the exit list table in order to make the table more functional.

Lists

  • WP:MOS#Bulleted and numbered lists suggests turning lists into straight prose where feasible. Aside from tables, the article has five lists. At least some of these could be written in straight prose.
 Done

Lead

  • The lead should be an inviting summary of the whole article. The existing lead is a kind of introduction but does not summarize the entire article. A good rule of thumb is to include in the lead at least a mention of each of the main text sections. In other words, you need something in the lead about bridges, tolls, tunnels, the surrounds, the history, and so on. WP:LEAD has details.
 Done

Route

  • Some of the paragraphs in this and other sections lack sources. A good rule of thumb is to include at least one source per paragraph and to cite a source for any statistics, direct quotes, or claims that are unusual or apt to be challenged.
 Done
  • The Manual of Style advises against extremely short paragraphs or sections. Two of the last three paragraphs in this section are one-sentence orphans. It would be better to expand them or merge them.
 Done
  • "was reported to be 78.7 million Croatian kuna" - Could that also be expressed in U.S. dollars? Most readers of English will have no idea how much a kuna will buy. Or perhaps euros would be OK since you convert some later kuna figures to euros.
 Done
  • Shouldn't ENC be ETC? "most notably the ENC which is also valid for all other motorways in Croatia" - Abbreviations should be spelled out as well as abbreviated on first use; i.e., Electronic toll collection (ETC). Ditto for ECOSOC later in the article.
 Done

History

  • "However it must be pointed out that government of the Republic of Bosnia and Herzegovina" - What source says it must be pointed out? Probably it would be better to delete this part of the sentence and simply say, "However, the government of the Republic of Bosnia and Herzegovina... ".
 Done

Traffic volume

  • MOS:COLLAPSE advises against using collapsing boxes in the main text area of an article.
Replaced the table with a chart.
 Doing...Tried arrangements with the chart without and with data labels to find out it does not convey details as well as the table. Will retain the collapsible table, while addressing expanding issues with a thumbnail chart in the section.
 Done As described above.

References

  • The citations lack access dates. Usually these appear as "Retrieved September 1, 2010" at the end of the citation. Other citations like citation 15 lack author information that is readily available (Marina Biluš in this case). A good rule of thumb for web citations is to include author, title, publisher, url, date of publication, and date of most recent access if these are known or can be found. The date parameter in the citation template is meant for the publication date; use the "accessdate" parameter for the date of most recent access.
 Done
  • Since dates in Croatia are normally written in d-m-y (1 September 2010) format rather than m-d-y format (September 1, 2010), you might consider using d-m-y.
Since the month appears spelled out, I think there is no possibility for confusion so I left them in m-d-y format.

I hope these suggestions prove helpful. If so, please consider reviewing another article, especially one from the PR backlog at WP:PR; that is where I found this one. I don't usually watch the PR archives or check corrections or changes. If my comments are unclear, please ping me on my talk page. Finetooth (talk) 19:31, 14 August 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much, your comments have been most helpful!--Tomobe03 (talk) 22:24, 9 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]
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