Wikipedia:Peer review/Albany, Oregon/archive1

Albany, Oregon

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I have put in a lot of time working on this article in the past and I would like to work to push it toward being a higher rated article with the eventual goal of it being a featured article. I have got a lot of the basic information in the article and now need help refining it from top to bottom to make sure it can reach the mark. If I could get it reviewed for what is seen as missing content, incorrect grammar, spelling and just general style. I appreciate all the help from everyone and I look forward to finally perfecting this article.

Thanks, MathewDill (talk) 06:21, 8 March 2014 (UTC)

Comments by Cas Liber

Right, will jot a few notes in passing...something to think about is aiming for Good Article status. Take a look at the Good article criteria and think about whether the article fulfils them and maybe nominate after this peer review. Good Articles can act as "stable versions" in case of vandalism or long term article erosion. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 01:47, 29 March 2014 (UTC)

Given the article is 73kb, the lead should be bigger - think of another 2- 3 factoids to stick in it.

The lead shouldn't have any references in it - all facts in the lead should be expanded upon or mentioned in the body of the text and the inline references located there only.

Watch for repetition in prose, see how I tried rejigging here to remove some redundant words. There will be some other examples. For some good reading, take a look at User:Tony1/Redundancy exercises: removing fluff from your writing and User:Tony1/How to improve your writing. I found these very helpful.