Wikipedia:Peer review/Ghosts I–IV/archive1

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Ghosts I–IV[edit]

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
This article just went through a very easy GA review, and I am interested in nominating the article for FA status soon. I would like a little more feedback before I take that step, however. Any comments or suggestions are welcome and appreciated. Thanks, Drewcifer (talk) 23:08, 18 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Ealdgyth (talk · contribs) -

I'd have asked these questions at FAC also, so consider this a prequel for FAC. 22:50, 22 April 2008 (UTC)

Cool, I love prequels! So, source by source: the Rock Band is indeed a blog, but that's not necessarily the kiss of death. The site is the official Rock Band website, and the interview is concerning a contributor to a band (NIN) that is closely associated with the game. The fact that they chose to release the interview on what can be most closely described as a blog doesn't mean it's unusable, it's just a matter of the source of the blog. Pop Matters and Tiny Mix Tapes are reliable since, based on the criteria of WP:RS, 3rd party sources have referenced/mentioned both sites as sources of information (link and link). Swapped out the cinemablend reference. Drewcifer (talk) 10:43, 23 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ruhrfisch comments: Interesting article, I will try to point out problems that would arise in FAC. I suggest you watch and participate in some FAC discussions if you are not already, and that my comments be treated as examples (so if there is one run-on sentence, there may be many more I did not note or even catch - please check for them too). Here goes:

  • Since In Rainbows is already mentioned as a comparison and it is already FA, I would look at it as a model article for this one. If there are other NIN albums that are FA, they would also make good models.
  • Possible run on sentence It contains 36 instrumental tracks and was recorded in ten weeks of autumn 2007 and is the first Nine Inch Nails album released without a record label contract.[1] How about Its 36 instrumental tracks were recorded in ten weeks of autumn 2007, and it is the first Nine Inch Nails album released without a record label contract.[1] instead (or something similar)? REWORDED
  • I have read this sentence several times and still do not understand it: Accordingly, the album was reportedly stripped of much artwork and accompanying visual interpretation.[4] The article does not make it much clearer. Also avoid "reportedly" - attribute (According to X, because of this the album was stripped...) REWORDED
  • Provide context for the reader - who are Atticus Ross and Alan Moulder - they seem to be producers, but the lead doesn't really say. See WP:PCR
  • Recording section has "Reznor" 3 times in the first two sentences - try some pronouns for variation DONE
  • Any reason not to name the album in The last Nine Inch Nails release on Interscope was a remix album based on material from Year Zero.[5] (I think Year Zero Remixed would be fairly clear that it is "a remix album based on material from Year Zero" REWORDED
  • The Appearances in other works section is very short - NPR is already mentioned in the Music section, any reason this can't go there too?
  • Could Artwork and Film festival sections be combined? Both fairly short and seem very related. Any chance of showing any of these artworks (not sure if they would be the right CC license, but perhaps Fair Use)?
Since Ghosts is licensed with the share-alike and non commercial clauses, any resulting art must be licensed similarly (share alike), which would mean it too would be unusable for commercial purposes.
  • Chart positions - I do not write music articles, but it seems to me that total weeks on the chart and date of the peak position could be included easily here (lots of room to expand the table)
This is generally discorouged. Please see WP:CHART.
  • Reznor described the music of Ghosts I–IV by saying "This collection of music is the result of working from a very visual perspective - dressing imagined locations and scenarios with sound and texture; a soundtrack for daydreams." needs a ref. DONE
  • Refs seem good in general, any chance of more images - free ones of Reznor or other musuicians / contributors perhaps?
Added one of Viglione.

Hope this helps, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 18:20, 23 April 2008 (UTC)[reply]

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