Wikipedia:Peer review/Highland cattle/archive2

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Highland cattle[edit]

Previous peer review

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I have address all the concerns from the last review. I am wondering how this would swing at WP:FA? If it would not pass any suggestions?

Thanks, TheMagikCow (talk) 17:50, 25 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from starship.paint

  • I think the geographical distribution of this cattle should be made more explicit. Which countries in Central Europe - which probably don't include Norway. Does the United States and Mexico have it?
  • Is there any population estimate in any country?
  • Many also call the cows hairy cows, due to their thick coats. seems unsourced. starship.paint ~ ¡Olé! 05:07, 8 July 2015 (UTC)  Done[reply]

PR by RO[edit]

  • often farmed primarily for their meat
Maybe raised is better here that farmed.
  • They are a hardy breed due to their native environment, the Scottish Highlands.
You've already mentioned their environment, so link there and combine/ce to avoid this repetition.
  • their native Scottish Highlands which have a high annual rainfall and sometimes very strong winds
Watch for missing commas before non-restrictive clauses like which have a high ....
  • where they both graze and browse
As a casual reader, I don't know the difference between these two terms.
  • Most commonly a single calf is born, but twins are not unknown.
Are you using twins to denote two?
  • Highland cattle are known to have a history that dates back to at least the 6th century AD
Omit are known to as redundant excess.
  • There were two distinct types of Highland cattle first described in the 1885 herd book
It seems to me you touch on this multiple times when it should be consolidated into one point in the lead and one in the body of the article.
  • small farmers
Reword
  • Highland cattle can produce beef at a reasonable profit from land that would otherwise normally be unused agriculturally
Reword the end to avoid unused agriculturally. Maybe "unsuitable for agriculture" or something like that.
  • Conclusion

Not bad overall, but look for missing commas and repetition (particularly the breed stuff), which are two things that jump out at me while reading. Good luck, and thanks for your contributions! RO(talk) 16:38, 10 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you both User:Rationalobserver and User:Starship.paint. Addressing concerns now! TheMagikCow (talk) 14:43, 11 July 2015 (UTC)[reply]