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Wikipedia:Peer review/List of Russian saints (until 15th century)/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
This article represents Russian saints from the early years until the 15th century. Another part will be created about saints since the 16th century, so I am not sure whether the content should be repeated then.Tomcat (7) 12:18, 21 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Sotakeit

Language/grammar:

  • Great Martyr/megalomartyr (великомученик) – one who died of a most crude martyrdom. Unsure of your meaning here? Do you mean 'a particularly violent martyrdom'?
    • Reworded
  • A clergy who died for his faith. This should be 'a member of the clergy who died for his faith'.
    • Done
  • Monkmartyr. Not being an English word I would place this in quotations, as two seperate words, as you have done with 'Great Martyr' and 'New Martyr': 'Monk Martyr'.
    • I reworded to Monk Martyr
  • For the entry on the Apostle Andrew (first on the list), I think an explanation of what is meant by 'Natural canonization' is necessary.
    • This means that traditional Christian denominations automatically list Apostles as a saint
  • I may have missed where the explanation is, but the numbers given as 'period in which the saint was canonized' don't seem to mean anything? '1', '7', '5' etc?
    • The third paragraph of the lead explains this
  • I'd think about rewording the heading 'Short description reason for canonization' as it doesn't read very well in English. Perhaps 'Short description for reason of canonization' or simply 'Reason for canonization'.
    • I clarified, it meant Short description and the Reason for canonization

Content:

  • In the first paragraph of the Hagiology section, I think the sentence 'The Russian Church became less depended by the Constantinople Orthodox Church over the years' would be better placed at the start of the second paragraph.
    • Moved
  • In the second paragraph of the Hagiology section, I think 'made way for' is more idiomatic than 'made way to'.
    • Done
  • Perhaps an explanation of what is meant by 'Fool-for-Christ' as you have done with the other Saint Titles?
    • Explained, although I am not sure if it is understandable

References: Not speaking Russian, I'm unable to comment on the vericity of most of the sources used and although not strictly nescessary I'd look to find some more English sources. Also, some parts are missing references:

  • The whole first pararaphy of the Saint Titles section has gone unreferenced.
    • Added a reference
  • In the table, some of the text under 'short description reason for canonization' needs to be referenced. For example non e of the four paragraphys for 'Hieromartyrs Ephraim, Basilius, Eugenius, Elpidius, Agaphodorus, Epherius and Сapiton of Chersones (4th century)Священномученики Ефрем, Василий, Евгений, Елпидий, Агафодор, Еферий и Капитон, епископы Херсонесские' are referenced.
    • Most of the text is based on Lives of Saints, the references are listed below the article.

Sotakeit (talk) 15:57, 23 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for your comments. Regards.--Tomcat (7) 10:55, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]
@Tomcat. Over all a very interesting article. I enjoyed reading it. In regards to 'Fool-for-Christ'. How about something like: 'One who deliberately flouts society's or Christianity's conventions, hiding his piety from the word in order to avoid praise, in service of Christ'? Sotakeit (talk) 11:39, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I think it is too long. --Tomcat (7) 10:11, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]