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Wikipedia:Peer review/Mustafizur Rahman/archive1

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I am nominating this article as it needs attention. Ikhtiar H (talk) 09:57, 1 March 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by David Fuchs

[edit]

{{doing}} Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs(talk) 14:11, 2 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@David Fuchs: Please do not forget about this one. :) --MrClog (talk) 11:11, 18 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I absolutely did (you coulda' pinged me way earlier!) My apologies. I'll get this done this week. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 00:16, 20 May 2019 (UTC)[reply]
@David Fuchs:? THE NEW ImmortalWizard(chat) 14:02, 23 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I thought I posted my review a while back, the edit must not have gone through. I should still have a copy of it on one of my computers, I will follow up on this. Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 17:07, 23 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Posting saved review as follows:

Overall:

  • Let me start off by saying I know next to nothing about cricket. So some comments might be a little basic, but I think it's generally helpful to make sure your articles can be mostly grok'd by a layman anyhow, so there's my perspective.
  • I think the lead could use some more details and some restructuring. There's nothing about his early life as covered in the body, and it's kind of strange it jumps to his international performance before doubling back to tell us what he was doing before that.
  • Why is he referred to as a fast-medium bowler in the lead, but just a fast bowler everywhere else (including the linked article about bowling?)
  • There's a {{update}} update-needed template on the article that needs to be addressed.

Prose:

  • He has taken the most wickets (13) in a debut One Day International series.—Does he hold a record here? How it's phrased doesn't make it clear.
  • Per MOS:CURLY, you should change the curly quotes throughout (’) into straight quotes (').
  • Rahman's interest in cricket rose when he started practicing the game 40 kilometers away from home every morning, with his brother Mokhlesur Rahman—this kind of begs additional questions I'm not sure if the sources can answer (why the hell was he going 40km to play the game every day?) Might be better to just say he started practicing with his brother and leave out the distance.
  • Rahman went on to get married on 22 March, a day after fellow teammate Mehidy Hasan married his fiancee—kind of strange to not mention the person he's married to by name. You have it later on, but that means you have two "personal life" sections, so I think this needs to get turned to one.
  • He was picked for Bangladesh A's tour of West Indies.[3][6]—it's not clear what Bangladesh A is. A team? A league? A ranking?
  • I assume ODI is "one day internationals" and T29 "twenty overs", but you should make it clear (and what is a twenty overs match? Age? Number of participants?)

Images:

  • Lone image looks fine, is appropriately licensed.

References:

  • Spot-checked statements to refs 3, 4, 5, 9, 10, 15, 24, 35, 50, 60, and 74.
    • [1] (ref 3) does not seem to support Rahman's place of birth.
    • [2] (ref 24) says he got three wickets against South Africa, not four as the wiki text says.
    • Otherwise statements seemed accurate without issues of plagiarism/close paraphrasing.
    • Copyvio detector didn't turn up any meaningful issues; possible violations are wiki mirrors.
    • Since I'm not a cricketer, I had questions about the following publications as reliable sources: theindependentbd.com, Cricwaves, iplt20.com, bdcrictime.com, crictale.com, cricketcountry.com
      • Citations should be fully formatted with authors, dates, wiki linked publishers, etc. Archiving them via archive.org or the like would also ward off linkrot.

--Der Wohltemperierte Fuchs talk 15:03, 24 July 2019 (UTC)[reply]