Wikipedia:Peer review/New Albion/archive3

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New Albion[edit]

Previous peer review

I've listed this article for peer review because I believe the New Albion article is ready to take the next step, namely FA status. I've had a few pieces of advice which I've followed, but nothing which is comprehensive. One particular editor recently stepped in and archived all the websites which were used as sources. All the sources are, I believe, high quality. I've author linked all that I can. I even wrote two new articles about authors just so they could be author linked. Those who are not author linked are of a very high quality, recognized authors in their field.

A GA was awarded after what I believe was a very thorough assessment. You can read it HERE. The article has been significantly improved since then, so I believe it is ready. Kind regards, Hu Nhu (talk) 03:30, 28 July 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Niagara

  • "Initially, details of Drake's voyage were suppressed, and Drake's sailors were pledged not to disclose their route under threat of death." — What was the reason for this? I'm assuming it was to keep the Spanish from finding it.
Completed.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "...concluded that the Indians believed him and his crew to be gods...", "Most likely the Indians..." — Is the term Indian the most accurate for this context? Unless Drake specifically refers to them as Indians, natives (or something similar) might be better.
Completed.I used people and Miwok.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • For centuries, you use both words (sixteenth-century and seventeenth-century), and numerals (20th century and 21st century). For consistency, I would choose one style or the other.
Completed. I chose numerals as they were already most prevalent.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Describing their lack of seamanship experience and navigational knowledge, Davidson recognises a plethora of confusion, chiefly from armchair historians which include distinguished persons such as Samuel Johnson and Jules Verne." — Who's lacking? I would reverse the sentence to clarify that it's the armchair historians.
Completed.Yes, this was a rather awkward sentence.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
    • Suggest: "Davidson recognises a plethora of confusion from armchair historians, which included Samuel Johnson and Jules Verne, owing to their lack of seamanship experience and navigational knowledge."
Completed. I re-wrote using a somewhat different phrase.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • Nice set-up for your references and the usage of WP:CITESHORT. To ensure consistency, I would make sure that consecutive page numbers are seperated with the En-dash, and only non-consecutive pages use a comma.
Completed. The En-dash is in all such places.Hu Nhu (talk) 19:08, 13 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Interesting article. The closest I've been to New Albion was a visit to Point Bonita. I hope this helps, if I notice anything else I'll add it here. Niagara ​​Don't give up the ship 00:35, 7 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hello and thank you Niagara. This certainly does help. I absolutely concur with you comments and will soon make the changes you suggest. And please do let me know of anything else you might see.
One other editor has indicated that in lieu of a FA mentoring that he also take a quick look at the article--which he will do when he returns from holiday. I look at FAs and think this one is close. I am excited to nominate it after it has some further comments from editors such as you. Kind regardsHu Nhu (talk) 20:22, 10 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

FAC peer review sidebar[edit]

STANDARD NOTE: I have added this PR to the Template:FAC peer review sidebar to get quicker and more responses. When this PR is closed, please remove it from the list. Also, consider adding the sidebar to your userpage to help others discover pre-FAC PRs, and please review other articles in that template. Thanks! Z1720 (talk) 17:19, 16 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@Hu Nhu: are you still looking for comments for this article? If so, I suggest posting details of this PR on Wikiprojects or asking editors to comment on it. If not, can you close this? Z1720 (talk) 00:03, 13 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for the message, Z1720. I've posted it on the WikiProject California/San Francisco Bay page. They have the article listed as high importance so I am hopeful someone will add to the review. Kind regards,Hu Nhu (talk) 17:55, 21 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]