Wikipedia:Peer review/Paul Kane/archive1

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Paul Kane[edit]

De-stubbed and turned into a real article. Could use more eyes: my grammar may be clunky at times. Lupo 10:09, 21 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]

Man, you are one crazy editor, good job! My main comment, that first paragraph needs to be reworked. Particularly the sentence In 1845...', which is very long and runs on. By the way, how do you manage to produce so much work in so short a time? I'd love to be able to edit like that. If you have the time give me some pointers at my talk page. Thanks. MyNameIsNotBob 11:22, 21 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]
Short time? Are you kidding? I've been working off-line on this for weeks now! You're right about that lead paragraph; I've rewritten it somewhat to get rid of this overly long sentence (a weakness of mine, I know). Lupo 11:45, 21 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]
Much better, although I think you could possibly better tell the reader about the purpose of the article a lot quicker or more precisely than you have. MyNameIsNotBob 12:23, 21 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]
Help me do it, take a shot at it yourself! I'm not feeling possessive about this article (if I did, I shouldn't have uploaded it here), and having spent so much time on this subject it may well be that I don't see the wood for the trees. Lupo 12:29, 21 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]
VERY nice. Just I would like to see more on his work (ie not random samples of his paintings, but some sort of development: like say he started in this style and later progressed into some other style). Or maybe some influence he had for future painters. That's if you really want to take it five steps further :) Renata3 21:15, 29 December 2005 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for this great suggestion. I'll try to place him in context within Canadian art history, but as I'm no art historian, I'll have to dig out some useful reference books. It might take some time. You wouldn't have access to Denis Reid, A Concise History of Canadian Painting, ISBN 0-195-40663-X, so you could look up what he has to say on that subject? Sadly, my library here doesn't carry that book... As to the images: they're not a random sample at all. I've amended the image captions in an attempt to explain why I have chosen these images, and I'll add a few more to illustrate the earlier paragraphs. Lupo 09:35, 2 January 2006 (UTC)[reply]
All right. I've added a section on "legacy and influence". It appears that there are very few clearly traceable influences from his style on the work of later painters. This is not surprising, as Kane's style was not particularly innovative; it was his choice of subject matter that was extraordinary for the time and made him famous. Lupo 08:24, 3 January 2006 (UTC)[reply]
That section is really something :) I like it a lot. I checked the book, my college does not have it also. I run out of comments or constructive critisism (well except that now there is a white gap between pictures in Works section, but that can be fixed in asecond). If you FAC it - let me know on my talk page and you got 1 support. Renata3 00:39, 7 January 2006 (UTC)[reply]
Oh, and so that you know: language flow is very very nice. One of the better WP articles I have read. Renata3 00:45, 7 January 2006 (UTC)[reply]