Wikipedia:Peer review/Phagocyte/archive1

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Phagocyte[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I would like others to assess my progress. This is an AP Biology project (we must get and article relating to biology up to GA or FA status)

Thanks, Eulemur2008 (talk) 20:58, 17 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Several small issues that jumped out at me:

  • "Antigen Presentation" and other headings - no need to overcapitalise unless you're talking about proper nouns.
"Fc Receptors" and related names/titles - capitalize everywhere or nowhere.
  • What is in "antigen?" I was not encouraged to seek it's meaning when it should be linked from the article
Along the same lines, what are "leukocytes" or "neutrophils?" You include neutrophils under "Types" but I still lack a fundamental sense of what they are. In short, you need to use more layman's terms because I, an AP Biology student, can barely understand what you are talking about let alone the average human.
  • Reference for "Resistance by pathogen"(?)

By a quick glance it appears decent, so far as a quick glance can go. However, I suggest you: take a look at WP:STYLE for some of your section headings; research for a greater field of resources (I see you cited one source some eight times... which is fine as long as it is reliable); wikilink and "dumb it down" for us simpletons. Take all of this with a grain of salt, though, as you know I am only a fellow student. FoodPuma 01:22, 18 November 2008 (UTC)[reply]